Text Messaging Humor – Piper Style

Laughter is wine for the soul – laughter soft, or loud and deep, tinged through with seriousness – the hilarious declaration made by man that life is worth living.  ~Seán O’Casey

Since my posts have been pretty heavy lately, I wanted to come back to my preferred reality of fun and humor.  This post is a bit unconventional, but what the hay, life is short!

Yesterday, I was going through my photos on iPhoto, which usually originate from my iPhone, some from my iPad.  Looks like over a year or two, when there was a funny text message, I would take a screen shot.  Usually when I do this, it’s to be accompanied with a blog post, but some may have been forgotten or there wasn’t the space.  So in honor of these silly text messages, here they are for all to share.  Enjoy!

Warning:  These text messaging screen shots are really NOT funny, but they sure do bring a smile to my face.

5-12-12 Kyle Aunt Heather Piper

My little man… Kyle     Screen shot 5/12/12

This isn’t funny, but simply sweet.  I must have taken a screen shot of my phone screen.  Naturally, guess who always seems to take center stage.  This picture was accrued during a Santa Workshop at Kyle’s elementary school.   He always did love me showing up and helping out, believe it or not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here is one that cracked us both up.  My friend Kelly and I were texting back and forth and it appears I wanted to make a Barnes and Noble run, but I was already involved in another book serious.  I have a sneaky suspicion the “book” Kelly was referring to was Allegiant by Veronica Roth.  Usually, I order my books online, but sometimes I do swing by the store in a moment of book desperation.  This one I remember I ordered to begin upon completion of the Harry Potter books.  The show, which involved the auto correct is called Mike & Molly.  Auto correct struck again!

10-1-12 Kelly Berger Aunt Heather Piper

Wanting to read Allegiant but busy reading the Harry Potter books. 10/1/12

I remember this day very clearly.  For it was a day of disgust, intrigue and pure victory.  After much distraught and confusion, I finally found what was running rampant in my house.  I thought it was a mouse, a super mouse to be exact, but after I caught the elusive critter, I found out it was a chipmunk!  Gross.  Yes!  But victory was mine and I could now find peace in my own house. Of Mice and Me … Part 4

10-28-12 Chipmunk Aunt Heather Piper

Chipmunk Incident 10/28/12

Every year, Nicole takes Kyle for a week in the summer.  It’s been referred to as the ‘Aunt Nikki and Kyle’s Week of Fun’.  Sometimes they do stuff locally around the D.C. Metro Area or sometimes they go away for the week or a few days.  It’s a nice time for them to spend together.

This particular trip included a bunch of cold showers.  Kyle cracks me up!  We’ve been bribing and fighting with Kyle to take showers for as long as I can remember.  He never wants to!  I still have no idea what his aversion is to being clean, but there it is.

There were times when I wouldn’t get him for a week, and when I did, he was greasy and filthy!  Then, to only be resistant when taking the plunge.  You could tell it wasn’t an act that was reinforced regularly and instilled in him (not from my family, we love to shower and do it regularly, meaning daily).  I had the same problem with Kyle and brushing his teeth.

Recently, Kyle said to me, “I always take a shower, every night.”  What?  News flash buddy, who are you trying to kid?  He made it out like he’s been do this his whole life, but in reality it was this past week.    I’m on to you and I have proof!

11-13-12 Cold Showers Aunt Heather Piper

Kyle’s comment on cold showers during Aunt Nikki and Kyle’s Week of Fun. 11/13/12

This did crack me up.  While outlining Christmas plans for the year, out of nowhere, Nicole started the Soft Kitty song.  She cracks me up.  I showed it to Kyle and he was grinning from ear to ear, being a fan of the song and the show, The Big Bang Theory.

12-21-12 Soft Kitty Aunt Heather Piper

Nicole texting Soft Kitty to me.. for no reason just to be silly. I cracked up! 12/21/12

I read random things online.  Usually they are human interest stories, news articles, breaking news, politics and such, but there is the occasion, when I find something that catches my eye for pure entertainment.

I started writing blog posts about these interesting facts, eventually calling them ‘Random Fun Facts’.  They are simply information and statistics, which I was not aware of or did and forgot, or information I feel others might find interesting.  This particular blog topic was focused on flatulence.  Yes!  Farting!  I found it funny and entertaining, which I clearly replied to Nicole, after she evidently read the blog post.  Facts About Farting  Read it, it’s actually enlightening!

12-27-12 Farts Aunt Heather Piper

Our conversation based off of my blog post, Facts About Farting. 12/27/12

This conversation started out discussing business, Thrill of the Hunt, our start-up company.  Apparently, I needed a check for something.  If my memory serves me correct, it was to pay for our booth at either the Banana Split Festival in Latrobe or the Steelerfest at Saint Vincent College (Random Fun Facts: Saint Vincent College, Bertha Nesser’s Alma Mater May You Both Find Eternal Peace).

I am happy to announce the business has come a long way in a little over a year, yet we still have many more journeys ahead.

What cracks me up, in the middle of our presumably serious conversation, Nicole goes south.  Please refer to the previous screen shot and entry, where she makes fun of me and my flatulence topic.  Can’t tell we’re sisters?  At least mine was in response to an infographic I read, hers was due to an experience.  Notice how I instantly threw my dog, Seven under the bus!

8-7-13 Aunt Heather Piper

Nicole & I discussing our company Thrill of the Hunt & then the conversation quickly goes south! 8/7/13

These screen shots were my proof, I needed to sent to Kyle, showing I’m not a terrible chess player.  We both love to play the game, and as I’ve mentioned before I taught Kyle to play when he was just a little man. Checkmate – Game of Chess  Naturally, at that time I used to crush him, not so much in present days.  This particular instance, I was playing the computer and I won!  Twice!  I was on fire!  Granted, I’m sure if it was on the hardest or easiest setting.  However, come to think of it, it might have been on the hardest, since Kyle is the one who manages the controls.  Regardless, I took screen shots and IMed them to Kyle.  Victory was mine!

On a side note, I always have to be white and Kyle black, as per my little man.

8-11-13 Checkmate against computer Aunt Heather Piper

On the left 8/10/13 & on the right 8/11/13 I beat the computer… finally. I had to send these to Kyle! Victory was mine!

This conversation was between me and Kyle.  To be honest, I don’t really remember why he was asking about my legs or what book he wanted.  I wish I would have kept some of Kyle’s other text messages, even though they usually only consist of “Ya” and “Ok”.  Man of few words.  The funny part of this text is Kyle’s call out of “Bad Girl”, an inside joke (that I guess is not so inside anymore) WannaBe 80’s Scavenger Hunt & a Puppy In a Day.

8-21-13 Aunt Heather Piper

Bad Girl joke in our family… Kyle cracks me up! 8/21/13

Kyle strikes again.  He will only reach out if he needs something, and of course I always comply.  This time he needed a recipe for school.  I guess he was making something in Home Ec or they were reviewing recipes (I remember doing the same thing).  Later, I told Kyle we needed to work on his spelling, I guess his phone doesn’t have auto correct or it’s clearly not turned on.

I love being able to communicate with Kyle through so many different means!  My favorite is in person, but I’ll take what I can get when he’s not with me.

2-13-14 Cooking Aunt Heather Piper

Kyle needed a recipe for school. He needs to turn on his spell check! 2/13/14

This is my favorite of all!  At this point, every time I looked at Facebook through the app on my phone, this is what I saw.  It totally cracked me up!  Look at her face taking up the entire space!

What was really funny, this went on for a few days, every time I opened the app, there was Nicole’s head staring back at me.  It seemed to never update and push me through to other posts.  It was stuck on Nicole’s head!  Taking this as an opportunity to instigate, I screen shot it and shared it with her.

12-14-13 Aunt Nikki Aunt Heather Piper

Good old Aunt Nikki! 12/14/13

posted by auntheather in Books, Movies, Shows,Common Sense,Cooking with Kyle,Education & Learning,Family,Observation & Imagination,Random Fun Facts,Reminiscing,Thrill of the Hunt Scavenger Hunts and have No Comments

Everything is Awesome – The Lego Movie

Emmet: That’s the signal, but the shield is still up.
Batman: Then I guess we’ll just have to wing it.
Batman: That’s a bat pun.

Kyle-&-Duncan-at-5-Guys-Burgers-&-Fries-before-The-Lego-Movie-Aunt-Heather-Piper-2-21-14

Duncan & Kyle … two good kids… yet too addicted to video games! Five Guys Burgers & Fries before The Lego Movie 2/21/14

On Friday, I took Kyle along with his friend Duncan to see The Lego Movie.  For those who know Kyle, that’s certainly no surprise. His entire life (all of 12 years give or take for infancy age) has been one big obsession over Lego’s.  Even being a seventh grader, Kyle still enjoys putting those multicolored building blocks together and on the occasion, play with said structures.

We first saw the advertisement for The Lego Movie in the theater.  I’m not sure what blockbuster we were there to see, maybe Frozen.  Then it happened, a moment to change all of history, the trailer for The Lego Movie flashed across the screen and captivated Kyle instantly.  He turned to me, smiled and nodded his head saying, “We have to see that!”  I didn’t even get a vote.

Kyle-playing-with-Legos-2013-Aunt-Heather-Piper

Kyle lining up his Lego figures for battle. 2013

In all honesty, I too wanted to see this movie, thinking it was going to be really funny.  Well, that wasn’t the case, at least not in my opinion.  I know I’m not the target demographic, not even close, but come on, I expected a little bit more.   For the most part, I love watching kids movies.  Some I’ve thoroughly enjoyed include: Despicable Me movies, Cars, Finding Nemo, Monsters, Inc. (especially Monsters U), the Shrek movies and the Toy Story movies, but not so much this one.  Yes, there were some funnies, but nothing that had me rolling in stitches.  I was assuming with such popular characters as Gandolf and Batman there would be a ton of puns based off of their respected movies.  Nope.

Perhaps it’s because I watched the showing in isolation.  You see, Kyle and his friend wanted to sit closer to the front, which we all know I don’t like to watch a movie with my nose touching the screen.  Together Alone – Movie Night   Actually in Kyle’s defense, as we walked in, I assumed they wanted to sit without authority hanging over their heads, so I told Kyle “I’ll be up here”, I pointed to the back of the theater.  Kyle gave me a confused look at first, and then realized he could pick whatever seat suited him.  Smiling on my way up the steps, I lightly yelled to both boy, “Behave!”  I waited a few seconds till they got situated and then chose my seat, keeping them in my line of sight.  Kyle and Duncan were so well behaved I thought someone paid them off.

But back to this movie.  Seriously, the only humor I got a kick out of, was hearing Kyle laugh from five rows back and the little kid behind me singing the theme song, Everything is Awesome.  I found more humor in those two actions then I did the entire movie.

Kyle-&-Duncan-at-The-Lego-Movie-Aunt-Heather-Piper-2-21-14

Kyle & Duncan after The Lego Movie. Boys loved it, I wasn’t sold… 2/21/14

Slight Spoiler alert:  I can handle Legoland being an imaginary place the movie was centered around, but then to jump back and forth in and out of reality?  What?  I picked up on the lesson to be learned, but whatever.  Not a fan.  At least I have a new theme song to sing to Kyle, Everything is Awesome!

At least Duncan and Kyle enjoyed their night out on the town.  Prior to the movie I took them to Five Guys Burgers & Fries to eat dinner.  The entire time listening to them talk, mostly about video games, made me feel like I was in an episode of The Big Bang Theory.  I had my own Sheldon and Leonard.  Love those guys! (Kyle and Duncan and Sheldon and Leonard)  I’m truly glad they are friends who share the same interests.

I was telling mom about Duncan and how the boys interact, very well might I add.  I went off about the mind numbing conversations between the two.  Half the time I had no idea what they were talking about and when I did, I didn’t care to hear any more.  The conversations  were about video games, characters in video games, game trivia etc.  I wanted to scream, ‘Next topic, please!’

The way those two communicated, and I use that word communicated loosely, mom said Kyle reminds her of my sister when she was young.  Yep, Kyle and his Aunt Nikki are very similar.  The video games may have changed, but the clunky awkwardness remains the same.

On a side note, the plan was to take the boys the week prior, however, Kyle never told Duncan he wanted to go to the 5:00 pm showing which is what Kyle told me, and Duncan thought we were going to the 7:00 pm showing because he had piano lessons earlier but never mentioned anything to his parents.  I guess typical boys.  I assumed they had all plans figured out but I was clearly wrong.  This past night out on the town with the boys, before it turned into another fiasco, I spoke directly with Duncan’s mom to clarify all plans.  We were good to go!

Here are a few videos of Kyle putting together his Star Wars Death Star from Christmas 2011.

posted by auntheather in Education & Learning,Family,LEGO's,Observation & Imagination,Patience and have No Comments

Another Chapter to Face … Growing Up, Him Not Me!

Trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit.  ~Molière

Kyle-&-Aunt-Heather-Piper-Idlewild-Park-Pony-Ride-c.-2002

Me & Kyle at Idlewild Park for the Gutchess Picnic.  He always loved horses! c. 2002

“You knew this day was coming.”  My mom gravely reminds me.  What day is that?  The day I am no longer the coolest person to hang out with, the day Kyle doesn’t really want to plan his activities with me, the day when I find myself replaced.  Yes that day has happened, at least it’s on the verge.  My own person Apocalypse.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad thing, not in the slightest.  I’m more than thrilled Kyle has friends and he’s learned to build a relationship with someone other than me, his Gigi, pappy and Aunt Nikki.  Good sign Kyle is on his way to being a normal teenager.  We hope!

The issue doesn’t reside with Kyle but with me.  I personally need to adjust to this new standard and new way of being.  Kyle has always been by my side, for everything.  It’s pretty commonplace to find us together, no matter what we were doing, the movies, roller skating, snowboarding, cooking, grocery shopping, Christmas shopping…. you get the point.  Even going to picnics and parties at my friends’ houses, Kyle was always invited and he would tag along, mostly for the food or the idea of playing with other kids.

Aunt-Heather-Piper-&-Kyle-bedtime-pic-c.-2009

Me & Kyle screwing around at bedtime, taking selfies & texting them to Aunt Nikki. c. 2009

Why this sudden reminiscing about the good old days?  Because they are slowly slipping away and becoming a thing of the past.  Kyle is not wanting to hang out with his Aunt Heather as much.  Who am I kidding, soon it will turn into, ‘Not At All!’

The other day I mentioned to Kyle, “Buddy we still need to hit the slopes, before winter is over.”  His response, “Umm we’ll see.”  What is he the adult regulating my activities?  I added, “Why don’t you see if Duncan skis or snowboards and I’ll take you both up to the slopes.”  His comment, “Ok!  I’ll ask him, that would be fun!”  Yep!  I thought that was going to be his response.

Kyle-&-Aunt-Heather-Piper-Swinging-c.-2002

Me & Kyle at the Planinsek’s Pavilion, playing on the swings. c. 2002

It wasn’t just the snowboarding, although that’s always been our thing together, but it was the movies too!  Same story, I’d ask him if he wanted to go to the movies and the same blasé response, until I mentioned he should ask his friend to go, then it turns into a big deal and it’s exciting.  Again, I will reiterate, I am ecstatic that Kyle has friends and he has fun with them, but come on, throw the aunt a bone.

I knew this was going to happen, but it doesn’t make it any less depressing.  I should have seen it from that single moment when I dropped Kyle off at school and he wouldn’t let me walk him to his classroom in first grade.  That was the beginning of the this uncontrollable, unpredictable avalanche.  Yep, even as recent as this past June in the sixth grade, not even a year ago, he wouldn’t dance with me for his Folk Festival at school.  Denied!  No Dance For You!

Yes, I remember it wasn’t that long ago when Kyle was at daycare, one of his favorite places to hang might I add, and even though he had friends, when I walked in the door he was excited to see me!  He would come home and tell me all about his friend Luke.  He would say, “Aiya, my sviend (friend) Lutty (Luke).”  I remember when he first started talking about his friend Luke.  It was Luke this and Luke that.  Ironically, I did get to meet Luke and his parents and get to know his mom over the years.  I still talk to Sue Lander, the mom on Facebook from time to time.

Unfortunately, Luke was a grade younger than Kyle, so I’m sure they see each other, but aren’t glued at the hip like they once were.  Plus Luke is a lot like his mom, into running, not Kyle’s cup of tea.  He prefers his video games.  Different interests build distances between old friendships, I guess it happens.

His newest gang?  That would be Mr. Duncan, Kyle’s Very Own Big Bang Theory.  I’m happy he has friends he enjoys, and Duncan seems to enjoy hanging out with Kyle.

Kyle-roller-Skating-in-Latrobe-Aunt-Heather-Piper-c.-2009

Kyle at the Latrobe Roller Rink, roller skating. Look how flushed he is, working hard, skating like his dad! c. 2009

Kyle and I still have our interests, reading books and discussing them, church, sled riding and cooking.  All good activities to do together.  My favorite is our exchange of books.  Yes we swop books that we read and enjoyed (age appropriate).  We discuss the characters and the storyline and we use these new worlds for our own person inside jokes and funnies.  Example, this past weekend, yesterday morning as a matter of fact, Kyle and I took the dogs for a hike up through the woods, not Kyle’s suggestion might I add.  When we were walking back, Kyle was trying to uproot smaller trees.   Why?  No clue, but who cares, he’s a boy and he was having fun.  I said, “You better watch it, you might upset Treebeard!”  We both laughed at that one, for only someone who read the Lord of the Rings books would understand, I’m not just talking about watching the movies.

Yep, me and Kyle are two of a kind.  I only hope and pray we will always remain this tight.  He is my little man and I am his Aiya.

Here are some old videos of Kyle roller skating, he really worked hard at it.  Enjoy!

posted by auntheather in Books, Movies, Shows,Common Sense,Cooking with Kyle,Education & Learning,Family,Milestone,Observation & Imagination,Patience,Reminiscing,Snowboarding and have No Comments

Kyle’s Very Own Big Bang Theory Gang

Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I’m stupid!
Sheldon: That’s no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.  ~The Big Bang Theory

Kyle-at-LegoKidsFest-Pittsburgh-Pa-Star-Wars-Aunt-Heather-Piper

Kyle @LegoKidsFest at the David L. Lawrence Convention Center in Pittsburgh, Pa. He found his Star War friends! 12/1/12

Just about everyone loves the TV Show The Big Bang Theory, or at the very least has heard of the program.  Well, I am parked in that camp, as well as my sister and now-a-days, my mom and most of those I encounter.  For anyone who has been like Patrick Starfish, living under a rock, or who has just arrived to planet earth, The Big Bang Theory is about a group of four highly intelligent scientists who work together at the local university, two are roommates living across the hall from an inspiring actress.  The roommates,  Sheldon Cooper and Leornard Hofstadter are Caltech physicists; their co-workers Howard Wolowitz is an aerospace engineer and astronaut; and Rajesh Koothrappali, an astrophysicist.  Then there’s Penny, the always trying but never succeeding  actress who waitresses at the Cheesecake factory.  Yep, it’s about a group of geeks and Penny!

This year mark’s The Big Bang Theory’s seventh year.  I remember the first time I saw the show, the guys went to a Halloween party and Sheldon was dressed as the Doppler radar.  I almost died!  At that moment, I was hooked!

Why am I pouring my heart out about a television sitcom?  This past Saturday, I saw it unfold in real life.

Let me set the stage.  Yes my little man, who my sister and I always refereed to as a mix between Sheldon Cooper and Leonerd Hofstadter started showing interest in Dungeons and Dragons.  I’ve always made comparisons between Kyle and Leonard and Sheldon Food Has Many Tastes.  Recently, out little man was on a mission for the complete fantasy game and earned enough money to purchase one of the D & D boardgames.  Kyle has always loved the sci-fi type of movies and shows, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.  He’s been a Star Wars freak since I can remember, a Lord of the Rings fan, a Legoman and list goes on and on.  Not that I disagree with any of these, but Kyle, like others of his genetic makeup, who have been labeled geek status, takes these interests to a whole different level of obsession and experience.  After all, Kyle was the one who wanted to learn Elvish and looked it up to start and believed it would be too cool to know.  I might have had a hand in his interests, after all I was the one who bought him his first comic books, but on my defense I thought it was a great intro to reading books.  He loved them.  My sister also had a big influence too!

big_bang_theory_Logo Aunt Heather PiperWhat happened this past Saturday that gave me this epiphany?  After our Witches Brew Scavenger Hunt at North Park Saturday morning, which turned out to be a beautiful sunny day, Kyle wanted me to drop him off at his friend Duncan’s house.  Great!  Then, I was to retrieve him later on that day to hang for the rest of the weekend.  On a side note, I love Kyle interacting with his friends, he doesn’t do much of it, so when the opportunity arises, I am all for it!

Prior to Saturday, Kyle and I were making arrangements, trying to plan out times and such.  As I was talking to him on the phone, he was referring to his friend.  For the life of me I could not understand what the boy’s name was.  Kyle still has this very young child voice on the phone.  Even though he’s twelve, he sounds very much like a five year old.  He speaks very articulately just squeaky like a kid.  So as we were laying out the plans, I didn’t understand the name he was saying.  Deacon? Bacon?  Kyle was just laughing at my lack of understanding until he said, “Duncan, like Donuts.”  I died!  I said, “O, Duncan!”  We were both giggling.  Now don’t get me wrong, I love the name Duncan, a very old Scottish or English name, but at that particular moment Kyle and I were being Beavis and Butthead.  When I was talking, I kept throwing the name Duncan to see how many times I could say it in a sentence.  Ya, maturity runs very thin in the Piper line.

Kyle-at-LegoKidsFest-Pittsburgh-Pa-12-1-12-Aunt-Heather-Piper

Kyle @LegoKidsFest at the David L. Lawrence Convention Center in Pittsburgh, Pa. Yep he hit up the story for more Legos! The Lord of the Rings naturally… 12/1/12

On another side note, I saw the contact Kyle placed in his phone for Duncan.  He spelled it Dunkin, just like the donut!  I couldn’t believe it.  Laughing at his mistake I asked Kyle, “Is that how he spells his name?”  Kyle said, “I really don’t know.”  Trying to catch my breath and already knowing the answer, I said, “Buddy, I’m pretty certain he wasn’t named after a donut joint.  I think you have the spelling wrong, you might want to fix that.”  Kyle, usually assuming he is right (just like my sister) said, “Well, how do you know how to spell his name?”, as if I’m just a plain idiot wrong.  What a stinker!  Kyle must have asked about the spelling of the kids forename, because later he confirmed I was indeed correct.

Upon our completion of the Thrill of the Hunt Witches Brew Scavenger Hunt, Kyle and I headed towards Duncan’s house.  Naturally, I was not going to leave  my little nephew with complete strangers, so I followed Kyle up onto the porch to introduce myself.  Kyle was not happy about that, but I wanted to meet one of the parents and of course, Duncan!  As my little short Leonerd Hofstadter climbed the porch steps with his Dungeons and Dragons game tucked securely under his arm and his iPod in pocket (containing a list of games), out pops a tall thin Sheldon Cooper from the front door.  I was slightly taken aback and I couldn’t help but grin.

After meeting the dad, who seemed very nice and I gave him my digits in case of an emergency or issue, I left Kyle for a day of fun.  Once making my way to my car, I busted out laughing.  I had to share this realization of what just unfolded, with someone.  Who?  My sister!  She would totally understand, even if she never met Duncan.  Nicole shared in my vision and laughed when I outlined the scene.  She told me “Don’t pick on our little guy Aunt Heather!”, as she laughed along.

While reiterating the story with my mom, because you know I wouldn’t let it drop (dad would have never understood) I said, “I hope he finds his Howard and Raj, then they have their Halloween costumes set for next year!”

I love my little geek!  If he does turn into the real life The Big Bang Theory, I couldn’t be happier for him.  Kyle is who he is, and I hope he always remains that way and never compromises his principles and his true nature.  Plus, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.  Looks like I’m learning to play Dungeons and Dragons.  I even told Kyle we will go larping!  Bazinga!

big-bang-theory-bazinga-logo-Aunt Heather Piper

posted by auntheather in Books, Movies, Shows,Common Sense,Education & Learning,LEGO's,Milestone,Observation & Imagination,Reminiscing,Thrill of the Hunt Scavenger Hunts and have No Comments
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