Other things may change us, but we start and end with family.  ~Anthony Brandt

Kyle helping with his dad's flowers. Pap's headstone is in the background. 5/26/12

Every year since I can remember, my mom and I have been going to the cemeteries to plant flowers at the headstones of deceased family members.  Specifically, my mom’s parents and her grandparents.  Before my Aunt Katherine passed away, mom and I would also take Aunt Katherine to plant flowers on Uncle Frank’s headstone, her husband.  Uncle Frank and my grand pap Chester were brothers, so there’s the relation.  Participating in this tradition has allowed me to have a comfortableness with final resting places.  Little did I know, what eventually was down the road, now the present, has helped bring a sort of peace to me with death, loss and tragedy.  I have practically grown up with such a familiarity for Saint Vincent and Bethel Cemeteries that they are like an extension to me, my peaceful place.  Planting flowers is one of those small gestures that really mean a lot, makes me feel like I’m doing something for someone else, even if they are no longer physically with us.  It is also a way of getting to know those who have moved on before my time.  You see, inevitably there is always a story or two that was brought about while tending to their occupied space.  So in a way mom and I have a good time planting.

This past weekend continued our family tradition.  Some years my dad and sister would join us and ever since Kyle was able to walk, we’ve brought him along.  He’s great company, a big help and it’s important that Kyle knows the family, experiences a family tradition and Kyle has the opportunity to visit his dad’s final resting place.  We talk about Ryan, but it’s another gesture to keeping his spirit alive and the with days going by so quickly, it’s easy to have an extended period of time pass before making an appearance.

Without sounding morbid or demented in any way, I will admit I truly enjoy this repetition in history.  Going to the greenhouse to pick out the flowers, visiting all the grave sites, digging up the ground and making them look cheerful and inviting.  Freshly planted flowers shows someone was there, someone is missed, and someone cared about them.

Kyle taking a break by Gigi...it was already getting hot out. 5/26/12

Each year I would pick a theme, either a certain color motif or specific flowers.  This year since we’ve already had such an early spring, and a hot one at that, I talked to the greenhouse lady and she suggested waxed begonia’s since they do well in the heat and they will bush out and fill up the space.  Sold!  This year we planted four colors of waxed begonias.  While at the greenhouse, I always get a variety of flowers to plant at my house as well, along with the left overs from the cemetery.

Kyle is always a big help, but this year he really pulled through for me!  He carried the flowers back and forth, watered all the freshly planted greenery, removed the trash, filled up and carried water containers and helped dig a few holes.  Now, I am not a big fan of direct sunlight, being fair skinned I burn!  To get around the inevitable and to ‘beat the heat’ so to say, we started our tasks early.  Getting up around 6:00 am, we were out the door by 7:00 – 7:30 am.  I think by that time, the temperature already reached the 70s.  At it’s highest on Saturday I think it topped off in the 90s.  Crap it was hot!  Most cemeteries are laid out in the open sky, under the direct sunlight, which held true for our locations.  By the time we hit our last stop, Bethel Cemetery on the ridge, it was HOT and it was around noon, the hottest part of the day.  Kyle was so kind as to hold a golf umbrella over both of us while I planted.  Believe it or not it made a difference, the sun wasn’t searing our skins and there was a noticeable temperature change in the shade.  Mom sat in the shade most of the day since her joints where talking back and she was showing clear signs of old age.  Mom acted as our GPS all day, getting me to the cemeteries and pointing where the plots were location.  As I’ve mentioned, I am Directionally Challenged.

Aunt Katherine and Uncle Frank's headstone

Going in chronological order, we first hit Saint Joseph’s Cemetery to address Aunt Katherine’s and Uncle Frank’s headstone.  Usually my cousin John takes care of his parents’ plots but he wasn’t able to make it out from Philadelphia this year.  That gave me the honor of taking the responsibility and gave me an excuse to visit, since I haven’t been there in quite some time.  My Uncle Frank died when I was in the third grade or so, but my Aunt Katherine passed away years later.  She was a great lady, very feisty, strong willed.  I loved her spirit!  She was an old lady with a fight left in her until she passed away.  My mom and I would help her get groceries once every few weeks or so, whenever she needed them.  She would walk through the grocery store and read all the labels.  As a kid I would get impatient, never showing that to her, but expressing it to my mom.  Looking back on it now, I’m turning into that person and I have to laugh because I really enjoyed going grocery shopping with Aunt Katherine.  Not only was she a spitfire but she was also hard of hearing.  Not to be rude, but most people who are hard of hearing crack me up!  She never understood what I was saying, I guess I didn’t speak loud enough, although my mom had no trouble communicating with Aunt Katherine.  Hearing them walk through the store was like two people using bull horns to communicate.  She was  such a great lady, she would always say something funny toward me to keep in included in their conversation.  Sometimes it was just an ornery grin and a nob of the head, but I understood and smiled.

As were planting the headstones, I remembered the times we would pick up Aunt Katherine.  She would never hear us knocking at the door and she certainly never heard us letting ourselves in. There was the occasional scare, which is not a good thing to do to an elderly woman, as we came around the corner.  However, Aunt Katherine did get us back, sometimes when we would pick her up, she would lay down on the couch to rest before the big adventure.  Naturally she wouldn’t hear us walking through the door as she laid on her back, on the couch resting.  I never wanted to be the one to nudge Aunt Katherine and wake her, just in case God made a visit.  I would observe from a distance to see if her chest was rising and falling as mom would try to be subtle.  Once after waking her from her nap, she told me and mom about a dream she had either that day or shortly before.  Now, keep in mind, I was preteen or in my early teens when she told the story, so I know I don’t remember all the details, but she talked about this angel who was hovering over her while she laid on the couch.  Actually that story never scared me, but was very intriguing.

Aunt Mary & Uncle Walter's headstone

Even as a kid I always enjoyed Aunt Katherine’s company and her determination. When she would talk to mom and mention how tired she was, mom would ask her, “Well Aunt Katherine, what did you do today?” with a reply of “I had to scrub down the walls.” or “I needed to clean out the cupboards.”  It was an endless cycle that my mom couldn’t understand, but I got it, I knew exactly where she was coming from.  Boy, I do miss Aunt Katherine!  One day I’ll also talk about Uncle Frank, I don’t want to shun him out, but that’s for another story.

Yep, once we hit Saint Joesph’s Cemetery we headed for Saint Vincent’s Cemetery.  This one was the big stop on our tour.  As every year dictates we stop at grand pap Chester’s, mom’s mom, and her grand pap and grand ma’s sites.  Days before we leave to go on our excursion, mom calls around to see if anyone wants us to swing by their family plot and tend to them.  This year my cousin Paula asked that we take care of her parents.  Paula’s dad and my grand pap Chester were brothers and she was Ryan’s godmother.  Again, it really is not a chore in the slightest, I do enjoy planting the flowers and visiting.  This year we stopped by my Aunt Mary and Uncle Walter’s headstone and added them to our list.

Two cemeteries down, and we planted eight plots, and that wasn’t even my big order.  Once we make our way to the ridge, that’s my last stop and one that consumes a good part of the day.  I do spend a lot of time at my brothers headstone.  Not to discredit the planting I do for everyone else, but I will admit I do take a little extra time and plant probably way too many flowers on Ryan’s.  By the time we wrap up pap’s, baby Piper’s and Dale’s- a friend of the family’s, I am beat and ready to call it a day.  But it certainly is a day of satisfaction and peace, always looking forward to it the next year.

Yep I truly enjoy this tradition.  As weird as it may sound I plan around it and look forward to it every year.  Pardon the pun, but I have a feeling I will be keeping this tradition alive, only I will have a few more stops to make.

I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.  ~Abraham Lincoln

Kyle on his beloved tricycle. He's wearing the Polar Bear book bag I got him in Alaska. c. 2003

Two Sunday nights ago, I finished reading The Help by Kathryn Stockett.  It’s a period piece written during the early 1960’s dealing with segregation and civil rights in Jackson, Mississippi.  Now I never saw the movie yet, but I can tell you the book spoke volumes.  There are so many conflicts I can’t even begin to count, husband verses wife, maid verses bossy white lady, inner struggles, and struggles between right and wrong.  With all this going on and the changing times, what bothered me the most were the lies.  The main character had to lie to her family, boyfriend and best friends about all the time she spent on the typewriter.  Not only that, people lie to themselves about situations when they turned a blind eye, or just sit back and did nothing in the face of injustice.  I think that’s the worst, standing by while someone tells a lie and not even interjecting or rectifying the untruth.  Lies can come in many forms and fashions such as exaggerations, ignorance, silence or skirting around the truth.

As I read, I couldn’t help but feel this overwhelming pride for Kyle.  He has shown to be an ethical young man.  Of course how can he not, since we don’t lie in our house.  In fact, we are pretty brutally honest, probably to an extreme.  Now, I am not naive enough to not realize that Kyle can be and will be, influenced by others, but through the eyes of my family, being caught in a lie would be the worst disappointment ever and Kyle wouldn’t be able to handle that kind of stress!  Now I’m not saying I never told a lie, I’m no Abraham Lincoln.  But I will say that I’ve never directly lied to my parents.  I may have not mentioned everything and chose to leave out key details, but I will say with confidence if they ever thought to ask me, I would have told them the truth.  Off the top of my head, I remember when I was in high school I wasn’t allowed to go to concerts.  I really wanted to go and see The Cure with my friends, Tree and Maggie.  Well, I fixed that.  I had my parents drop me off at my friends house and their mother took us to the concert, which by-the-way rocked!  All I told my parents was that I was spending the night at Tree’s.  Case closed!  No questions asked, no issue.  What was funny and kind of stupid on my part, I walked around the next day in my new Cure concert T-shirt, but no questions were raised, probably because mom and dad don’t pay attention to things like that, and at the time my sister was in college.  She would have busted me for sure and called it out to my parents in a heartbeat.  Even though I was being slightly reckless, I always told my brother where I was going and what I was up to, just in case of an emergency.  Making that pack, we would never tell on each other, we actually would brag about what each one got away with, that’s another story.  Does this make the situation right?  No!  But you live and learn.

Pap was teaching Kyle to spit. Idlewild 8/2004

I would never want Kyle to act as I have, but if that’s the worst he could ever do, then I think he’ll be just fine.  Admittingly, the worst lie that I have ever been involved in, was merely my presence of just standing by, letting someone tell a lie and not correcting them or making the real truth known.  Unfortunately, this has happened to me more times than I truly care to admit.  Either I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to stir up trouble, or the lie was a mix of truth and exaggeration, or I didn’t want the person committing the infraction to be called under the carpet.  What’s worse, and I have been known to do this a time or two, is my re-iteration of an “exaggeration” initially told by someone else.   I sometimes bring it up again to give that person a second chance to rectify themselves , it’s kind of my way of making fun, and calling out that I know, they are full of crap.  Regardless, it’s not right, even if the other party doesn’t even realize the taunting.  It’s actually very sad.

Although, Kyle kind of takes telling the truth to an extreme, meaning he will throw you under the bus in a heartbeat.  Example, dad and Kyle went to the grocery store and came back with some goodies.  You know, Nestle’s Drumsticks, apple pie and a mini cupcakes.  I said, “We don’t need these! Dad why did you get pie?”  Kyle flew around the corner to address my question before the sound of my voice reached the living-room where dad was sitting.  He answered me as if he had rehearsed what he was going to say in anticipation of the question.  He proceeds to speak very deliberately and directly to me saying, “I told pap we didn’t need these and he said we could have a little treat.  Aunt Heather I didn’t pick them out, pappy put them in the cart”  As I was digesting Kyle’s attempt to isolate dad’s shopping decisions, I began cracking up!  As I walked into the living-room, I noticed the look on dad’s face and realized he heard the entire conversation.  Dad just sat there chuckling over Kyle’s account of the situation.  Laughing, dad said rhetorically, “Ya you didn’t want cookies either?”  Then looked at me and said, “I guess I’m in trouble.”  We found it extremely funny while Kyle was still very serious in his confession and was willing to stand by it.  You go buddy!  Fact is fact.

I’m glad Kyle has developed this innate desire to always keep the facts straight and the truth told.  However, I do feel that much like me, he might stand by and let an “exaggeration” slip through, or worse a downright lie.   If I know Kyle, this will eat at him, but he also doesn’t like conflict or issues, especially if it directly involves him.  Sometimes Kyle does tend to exaggerate a bit when telling his accounts of a story.  Or the opposite, when he runs and taddle-tails like he is the justice police.  Now-a-days, mom picks Kyle up off of the bus on Friday’s, however I used to pick him up at daycare to bring him home.  Once he told my mom, “Gigi, Aiya drives a race car.  She goes back and forth.” all while making a side to side motion as if demonstrating my changing lanes.  Now on my defense I have always been extremely careful driving when my little Narrow is in the car. He’s always been the precious package. Of course I should never Under Estimate What a Child Knows or what they perceive to be reality.

I guess I can only pray for Kyle to always do the right thing, and in the meantime I will continue to try and set a good example for him.

If you treat a sick child like an adult and a sick adult like a child, everything usually works out pretty well.  ~Ruth Carlisle

Kyle with slushy & water in hand, ready for Avengers! 5/6/12

It’s no secret that Kyle’s been one sick child, mostly having issues with his hearing and his ears.  From the time he was about six months old or a year till he was about five years old, he was constantly in and out of the emergency room and hospitals with ear infections, pneumonia, bronchitis, scarlet fever, croup, and strep throat.  He was poked with more IVs, surgical equipment, and needles than any kid should be.  Now I understand that some kids have it much worse and we have been blessed, but it’s still hard to watch.

This past Saturday Kyle had to be put under again, this time for glue ear.  According to the Medical News Today website: Glue ear, also known as secretory otitis media, otitis media with effusion, or serous otitis media, causes a glue-like fluid to accumulate in the middle ear, which should be filled with air. Glue ear is a common cause of dulled hearing in young children. In the majority of cases symptoms resolve themselves in time without treatment being required. When symptoms persist the child will probably need some kind of therapy.

Now we’ve gone through a nice little break without any major incidences.  But don’t breath a sigh of relief.  Recently, Kyle has been getting a lot more ear infections.  The doctors had him on antibiotics for a couple of months, which did not make me happy.  Obviously, they were not working, and finally Kyle was seen by an Ear, Throat and Nose specialist.  This past Saturday, when the doctors decided to take a closer inspection of the problem, they discovered that his adenoids did in fact grow back, for a second time.  This was blocking his ears from properly draining.  Then, they added a permanent tube in his right ear, removed a polyp from his left ear that grew over his eardrum and drained it.  The left ear was so bad with drainage, they couldn’t put the permanent tube in.  Because of this, Kyle will need to go back in a few weeks for a check up and schedule another procedure to place the permanent tube, once it’s had a chance to drain and heal up.  All this to hopefully give him freedom from sickness, or at the very least decrease the issues and give him his full hearing back.

Did I mention he is back on antibiotics?  Poor kid, his stomach has been so upset from the variety of medications.  However, I am on it, I have been pushing yogurts on Kyle since he started this unfortunate escapade recently.  What really struck me as odd and kind of upset me, was that no doctor or medical professional dealing with Kyle mentioned this yogurt tidbit of information.  A really good friend of mine, who happens to be a nurse reiterated the yogurt eating necessity with ingesting such large amounts of antibiotics.  I’ve always said I love my nurses, their concern always stretch beyond their shifts for the good of people.

Now this brings me back to what Kyle thinks of all this.  I don’t care who you are, or what procedure you’re going in the hospital for, it’s nerve racking and scary.  Kyle was certainly no exception.  Early on in the week, he kept bringing up the surgery, but he said “I won’t need any needles, they are giving me a mask to make me sleep. No needles and if they do, I will be sleeping so I don’t care.”  That’s my man!  In fact, this must have bothered him so much, the idea of getting a shot that he mentioned it quite often over the week leading up to the surgery, and as they where walking him down the hall to get suited up.

On the day of surgery, Nicole and I were there waiting for him.  I could tell he was stressed, but he was in good spirits.  After all he had an ipod Touch…Mission Accomplished!  When the nurse came out to put his wristband on him, he practically shot out of his seat, thinking she had a needle.  From my understanding, all Kyle was worried about was needles poking him.  Of course, I don’t blame him, he has been stuck with so many IV’s and needles over the course of his young existence, I’d be a bit skittish too.

As I sat in the waiting room and saw the time fly by, I knew this is was not a good sign.  Once the doctor came out to give a summary of the surgery, I felt so bad for my little man.  They had to give him an IV since they were scraping his adenoids.  All I could think of was the anticipation of his pain he would be feeling when he awoke, remembering when he had them removed and scrapped previously.

Approaching his bedside during recover time was a familiar sight, laying in a hospital bed with tubes sticking out of his arm.  He was half out of it and wanted to rest, and was not happy in the slightest bit about the tubes and the IV.  Again, I would have taken advantage of a little R & R myself, since his body has been through so much.  On a side note, would you believe that once I got through the double doors into the recovery area, I got lost.  I was turned around going in to see Kyle, forget about making my way back out.  To me that’s shear anxiety!  I think you should have the option for a guide to walk you around hospitals, especially since I am Directionally Challenged.

Preparing for Kyle to come home was easy.  I stopped at the store and stocked up on ice-cream, Popsicles, Scooter Crunch Bars, soft food for breakfast, and fruit for smoothies.  My good friend Holsters, yep the nurse, even gave me her extra blender since ours has seen better days.  Even though I’ve witnessed Kyle after such experiences, it still doesn’t lessen the heartbreak I feel for his suffering.  He didn’t smile at all, not even an attempt.  At one point I was watching him sit in the chair and I swear it took him two minutes before he blinked.

The doctor said they encourage him to start eating, especially solid foods to work his jaw muscles and get things moving along.  As with everyone who has gone through a surgery, you get to pick what you want to eat, standard rule!  Kyle requested Jioio’s pizza with mushrooms and black olives, one of my favorite pizza’s ever!  You got it buddy!  I was just happy he wanted some solid food and he seemed to have a little bit of an appetite.

Kyle loves Iron Man and the Hulk, Avengers! 5/6/12

By the time I picked up the pizza and brought it back to the house, he was starting to doze off but woke up when he saw me looking like a delivery person.  He asked for a slice, but didn’t eat it.  Then he asked me to make him a fruit smoothie, but didn’t really want to drink it.  I felt so bad, Kyle was in pain and sore and miserable.  At this point, my heart was bleeding and I wanted to help in some way.  We were given a liquid pain medication, which normally I don’t believe in taking, but this time I think it was a necessity.  However, Kyle felt differently, he didn’t want to take it.  Convincing him to take his medicine certainly brought back memories of us encouraging a much younger Kyle to take the prescriptions.  We sat there holding the syringe type of contraption full of a pain killing solution, trying not to spill any, and cheering Kyle to ‘Hurry up, real quick’ and ‘Just shoot part of it in your mouth and take a drink of a smoothie’, the only words of encouragement we could muster.  At first we convinced Kyle to take some of the medicine and then take a bite of the pizza.  Win! Win! He would be getting food in his system, chewing and taking down the pain meds.  Well, that worked for two little sips.  Ok, onto plan B.  Next I took a small juice glass and mixed a concoction of fruit smoothie and the rest of the pain medication for Kyle to kick back quickly.  I don’t blame Kyle, I tried a drop of the syrupy solution, expecting to say it’s not that bad, but alas it was totally GROSS!  Yuck!  I would have had a hard time taking that stuff down, and I’m not a sick ten year old.

As the night approached and we finished watching Iron Man for the millionth time, Kyle started to feel the effects of the codeine and was ready for bed.  He slept all night and woke up almost back to normal, by 6:00 am.  That’s about the time we usually get up on the weekends, so I thought that was a good sign.  He was hungry, not quite one hundred percent, but he was on the road to recovery.  I made him a breakfast and we loafed around until we had to get ready for church.  Now I didn’t have him go to CCD, but I did forewarn him that if he didn’t go to church, then I was not taking him to the movies to see the Avengers, a movie I was also dieing to see.

This round of procedures wasn’t as bad as when Kyle was a young tyke, at least from my memory and from my observation, I’m not the one going through the hell.  He’s a strong kid and he seemed to bounce back pretty good, especially leading up to the movie.  Afterward our two hours of eye entertainment, Kyle was totally charged!  It was a great movie and he sat by his Aunt Nikki, who was home too.  Even on the way home, he wanted to make fruit smoothies. Yep, he’s making his recovery.

Some family trees have beautiful leaves, and some have just a bunch of nuts.  Remember, it is the nuts that make the tree worth shaking.  ~Unknown

Kyle's sumo look he was about 6 months old. 1/2002

Sometimes my thoughts can be kind of morbid. I’m not saying I’m a dark person because I’m really not. But every now and then my thoughts and humor turn toward the dark.  I think I’ve mentioned Laughing About Nothing is a favorite pastime for me and Kyle.  Sometimes on the spot we’ll make up a fictitious stories and basically just crack ourselves up.  Well this story is a spill over from Responsibility – More Than Dirty Laundry.

Mom was sitting on the couch folding the laundry and going through Kyle’s cloths to see what we can give away to Saint Vincent de Paul.  Mom looked like she was being consumed by all the arms and legs of the clothing.  As she kept chugging away, I commented that we were going to loose Gigi in the mess.  Just then Kyle took his attention away from counting his Pig money, gathering cold hard cash for the ipod Touch … Within Reach and ipod Touch…Mission Accomplished.  He said, “Wow Gigi!  You have a lot done.” and I started to laugh.  It was funny to see how mom morphed into the piles of cloths and was almost camouflaged on the couch.  She said, “Yep, and Kyle I want you to go through all these cloths and try them on.  What fits put in your draw and what doesn’t is going to Saint Vincent de Paul.  I’m tired of seeing the same cloths in the wash when you don’t even were them.”

Just then my mind went into overdrive.  I said, “You know, if you would happen to die in this mess, I would have to clean up first before calling anyone.”  Kyle started to giggle and said, “They wouldn’t even be able to find Gigi.  They’d have to dig.” Mom interjected and said, “Ya and about four hours later you would be calling the paramedics.”  Now I started to laugh, that sounds like me, I wouldn’t just put away the laundry, I’d start to clean the entire house.  Then I had another funny thought.  I said, “If we had carpet in here I’d roll you to floor and vacuum around you.  Then when the paramedics came, they’d see the vacuum lines stopping at your body.”  Ok at this point I really turned this conversation dark.  I continued, “And you know the way I vacuum, I hit everything with the vacuum.  Gigi you’d be laying there and I’d be hitting the vacuum off of you.”  as I made the motion with my hand as if I was holding the vacuum and moving back and forth on the imaginary carpet.

Mom just laughed and I think she rolled her eyes at me.  You see everyone has their issues.  Mom’s is her rebelliousness from organization and the ability to not care how tidy or lack there of, the house is. My issues are the antithesis from mom’s.  I cannot handle disorder and a mess, to me it’s utter chaos and I can’t think, let along function.  Kyle tends to be more like me, having things in their place, but just items he cares about.  Everything else can pile up.  Although I think Kyle just enjoys watching mom and me banter back and forth.

Family!  The only people who will accept you for who you are, make fun of you, then ignore it like it never happened.

If you’re not learning while you’re earning, you’re cheating yourself out of the better portion of your compensation.  ~Napoleon Hill

Kyle with is new ipod Touch, Apple Store Shady Side 5/2/12

Nothing is as rewarding as working toward a goal and reaching it.  Kyle has been working hard to collect, earn, and find enough money to upgrade his ipod Touch 4^th generation 8GB.  Well, needless to say he did it, in record time might I add, within a week’s time frame.  Kyle saved the four hundred dollars, plus the tax for his new ipod Touch 4^th generation 64GB.  He had his eyes on the prize and saw the finish line.  As of this past weekend Kyle re-counted his money to show me he was ready to go shopping.  He even said, “Aunt Heather could you count the money too to make sure it’s all there?” I said, “Nope, you are pretty good at math and I trust you can count accurately.”  He looked at me and nodded in a confident way with his little smirk.

On Saturday morning, my sister called and started to negotiate with him for his current ipod Touch.  Being on speaker phone, I heard the deals fly.  His mission was to get one hundred dollars for the 8GB device, while my sister’s mission was to teach Kyle about dickering back-and-forth.  I could tell he wasn’t quite getting it, then I had to step in and help the poor little guy out.  Nicole said, “Ok does the case come with it?”  Kyle looked down at his three dollar case and didn’t know how to answer her.  I stepped in and said, “The case is yours.”  He looked at me shocked! I said, Kyle I’ll get you another case, it’s minimal.  He nodded in agreement.  Nicole retorted, “Are there scratches?  What kind of shape is it in?”  Kyle tried by saying, “It’s in good shape, there are some scratches on the back.”  I couldn’t help myself, Kyle seemed like a sinking ship.  I said, “It’s the new 4th generation ipod in the coveted white.  The ipod just came out this past November and he got it for Christmas, so its only five months old and in great condition.”  That was an understatement, Kyle took very good care of his ipod.  Nicole started laughing and said, “I’m suppose to be negotiating with Kyle!”  I interjected again, “He needs a little help” as I gave Kyle a wink and a grin.  He takes the cue and said, “Ya Aunt Nikki, I looked online and I can get up to one hundred fifty dollars for the white one like mine.”  I heard her giggling in pride and amusement.  Nicole gave Kyle one last effort, “Ok does it come with a cord and wall charger?”  Kyle looked at me like ‘Help I don’t know what to say?’.  You see I got Kyle the wall charger separately, like his case.  Giving him the biggest ornery grin I had in me, and speaking very deliberately into the phone, I said, “You send us a hundred dollar check and get it to us by Wednesday we’ll give you the ipod, the case, the cord and the wall charger.”  Then Kyle interjected by saying, “Ya Aunt Nikki or cash.”  That’s my buddy!!!  I about died laughing when I heard that came out of his mouth.  I told Kyle we can take a check from Aunt Nikki since she’s mailing it and she’s a trusted source.  Nicole wrapped it up by saying, “Alright deal.”  Kyle smiled ear to ear, being excited about his negotiation skills and the thought of that new ipod in his hands by this past Wednesday.

Now Kyle wanted to know when I was going to take him to get his new device that was going to give him freedom to store eight times the ‘stuff’ in the palm of his hand.  Since he’s going into surgery this Saturday, he wanted his new ipod before he goes under.  I don’t blame him, that’s something good to look forward to, in the face of the hospital and doctors.  I also didn’t want him to take swimming this past Wednesday, right before surgery, so that’s when we both concocted the plan of ipod shopping.  How could I say no to all his efforts and hard work.

Obviously we could have ordered the ipod online, went to Best Buy, Target, Wal Mart or any of the local stores, but instead I wanted him to have a true apple experience.  I took Kyle to the Apple store in Shady Side, Pittsburgh.  I don’t really get to go into the city very often and I know Kyle has never been to Shady Side, so I thought it might be a nice little trip, something different.

On the way down, I had to stop and get gas in the car, treating this like a true adventure.  As we were at Sheetz fueling up, with overpriced gas might I add, Kyle decided he wanted an MTO.  We sat at the picnic tables outside the convenience store.  Kyle ate and I continued quizzing him on his history homework, knowing we wouldn’t be getting back till later and he had a Social Studies test the next day.  Also keep in mind, before this point, I had Kyle reading over his questions in the car.  Then that brings me to what happened next.  After he ate his wrap and smuffin, I kept quizzing until he looked a little green.  I said, “What’s wrong buddy?” and he placed his hand over his stomach and said, “I’m just feeling a little sick. Kind of like I’m going to throw up.”  Wow!  This happened quick, one moment he was fine all excited about our trip and now he is ready to blow chunks.  Kyle made a very good observation that it was pretty hot out and I tend to get sick too in the heat too.  “Ok, let’s get in the air conditioned car, please throw away the garbage and I’ll get you some cold water.” was all I got out before I turned toward his direction and saw the same food that was just ingested being upchucked into the trash can.  Yikes!  I ran and got him water and eventually moved him into the air conditioning.

Kyle opening his purchase, Apple Store Shady Side 5/2/12

Now it was time to make some hard and fast decisions.  “Kyle are you ok?”, he quickly retorted with a “Ya, I’m alright, I think it was the heat.”
“Do you want me to take you home?”
“Ya, maybe. Can we get my ipod before Saturday?”
“No Kyle, we have your baseball game tomorrow night, (referring to Thursday) and then you have guitar and piano lessons are Friday.”
“O, Ok, well then let’s just go now, I’m feeling better.”
“No, if you’re not feeling well, we can get it another time, you have an ipod to play with, I think you’ll be fine.”
“Um, ya but let’s just go now.  I’m feeling a lot better Aunt Heather.  I think it was also me reading when we were driving.”
Now that I know he was feeling all right, I did mention, “Kyle do you chew your food?  It looked like the entire smuffin in the trash, like you didn’t even bite into it.”  He gave me the Kyle grin and we both laughed.  I said, “Ok I guess the Battle at Tippecanoe and the War of 1812 are going to have to wait.”

After I made Kyle go in the bathroom and wash his hands and rinse out his mouth, I also had him get a piece of fruit to eat.  We got back in the car, cranked on the a/c and headed west toward out destination.  He was fine after that and started to become really excited the closer we got.  Naturally like a proud aunt, I video taped the experience and took a few pictures while I was there.

As we approached the store, Kyle saw the apple logo hovering over the doors welcoming us into our very own apple experience.  I let Kyle lead the charge; after all it was his money, his purchase, and his choice. As always the apple employees are seriously the nicest and most helpful, welcoming us as if we are their most cherished customers.  Kyle gave the young lady direction on what he wanted and they went right to work.  He picked the white one, fitting to replace his last one.  I tried to stay out his way and let him make the complete transaction.  But then I noticed after he gave Ashley, our personal apple assistant for the time being, all the details, he started to play a game on one of the demo models like no body else existed in the store.  What?   Like he’s never played a game on an ipod before!

Eventually, I managed to peel him away from the game long enough to pick out a new case and sign the receipt.  We were even going to have them set Kyle up, but he never backed up his purchases to the icloud and he forgot his ipod at home, which is strange because he drags that thing around with him everywhere.

After we walked around and got some answers to my questions, we exited the store in the same friendly fashion as we entered.  Then we decided to walk around Shady Side.  Kyle decided he was hungry, well naturally he really didn’t have a dinner.  We saw a few different places, one being a frozen yogurt place and I convinced Kyle to get some real food first, then if he wanted we could come back.  Kyle picked the place, Cappy’s.  Through dinner Kyle was talking to my sister and he she must have asked were are we eating because all I hear Kyle say, ‘Crabs, no I mean, crepes’ followed by some serious laughing on his part.  Then he looked at me and said, “Where are we?” and I quickly answered, knowing what he was trying to get to, “Cappy’s”.  He thought that was the funniest thing, he couldn’t stop laughing about being tongue tied Tim, even after he hung up the phone.

After dinner I fulfilled my promise and took Kyle to Happy Berry for his make-your-own frozen yogurt sundae.  We sat there sharing the bowl, that he made to reach the ceiling, and studied his homework.  He did a great job answering the questions.  Some lady overheard us and told us that she remembers missing the trick question, ‘What year was the war of 1812?’  Kyle just smiled like ‘really lady?’ but was polite and didn’t say anything.

We eventually made our way back to the car and headed in the opposite direction we came from.  Kyle played with his new ipod Touch the entire way.  You know I had an absolutely delightful evening with Kyle.  He is a great kid indeed!

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.  ~Stacia Tauscher

Kyle's ready to ride with Pap pap. He loved that hat! Courtesy of Uncle Sonny

I’ve always heard people say, “They grow up so fast.”  I know it’s true, I’ve been watching it happen right before my eyes.  Recently, I’ve been catching Kyle wear my white under shirts.  Anyone who knows me, knows I always wear layers, even with T-shirts.  I will put on a white T-shirt under a T-shirt, which is the opposite of Kyle, who rarely even wears a shirt and hates layers.  Anyway as I watch him march around in my T-shirts it strikes me that they almost fit him!  My little man is getting so big!  I can almost wear his shoes too.  Granted I do have smaller feet, but still I can’t believe how much he has shot up and out!  I think Kyle loves showing me he can wear my cloths.  It has become a ritual that when I see him strutting  around in my Tees I say, “Is that my T-shirt?” and he just gives me an ornery grin.  Now don’t get me wrong, Kyle still is not into cloths, not even close.  He could care less what he looks like, which drives me crazy.  Once he couldn’t find the matching his flip flop.  He had one from each set.  Now granted they were both black, but the one was fixed with duct tape, which that set was only suppose to be worn around the house. Would you believe that kid put two different shoes on, a left and a right flip flop?  Then said ‘I’ll be fine’ and got in the car and was ready to go to the store.  I was mortified and he didn’t care, he just wants to be comfortable and he hates socks and shoes.  He detests clothing in general, anything containing zippers, buttons, denim, laces, long sleeves are debatable and anything that is layered is avoided.  Yep, that’s Kyle, he loves just sitting in his underwear.  I am hoping this phase will be out grown soon, although I’ve been waiting for it since he started to form an opinion about clothing.

Last week Kyle was helping me in the yard.  For every bag of grass clippings he helps me bag up and takes to the curb he gets a dollar.  While I’m mowing, he pulls weeds and he is my extra set of eyes, keeping watch for bees.  We make a great team and I enjoy him helping me outside.  As we put on our work cloths I start getting the trash bags, the lawn mower and such.  I head out to the backyard and call for Kyle.  He is a slow moving individual, like my sister.  Just then, I turned around and saw Kyle with his headphones on, adjusting them so the cord runs under his T-shirt, correction my T-shirt.  He looked like such a young adult getting ready to help me out in the yard.  I just smiled and realized he is getting older and he loves that ipod Touch.  As I made laps around the yard I would peek over to see how he was doing.  He was almost bobbing his head as he pulled weeds and then I saw his lips moving.  While I was bagging up my first round of grass clippings, I heard Kyle singing, although I couldn’t quite make out what he was saying.  I yelled over, “Kyle what are you singing?”  His reply, “Alvin and the Chipmunks”.  I about fell over, watching this maturing young man appearing older, yet he still is a kid inside.

Me & Kyle at the movie theater ready to watch The Hunger Games 4/2012

A few weeks ago I took Kyle to see The Hunger Games.  It’s rated PG13 and with the violence I wasn’t quite sure I should.  My sister and I both saw the movie first and we discussed it.  I also reached out to other friends with children of the same age to get their opinion.  Since Kyle really wanted to see it and was really nudging me, I agreed and took him to the movies.  Keep in mind we made these plans early Saturday morning.  That kid cracks me up, he is certainly a child of twenty first century.  He took my phone and ordered our tickets through Fandango on my iphone app.  We were ready!

While watching the previews, which I will admit I like watching.  I think it’s fun to see what’s coming out and to get excited about another movie.  During the previews, the movie Dark Shadows appeared on the big screen.  Kyle leaned toward me trying to whisper, not really succeeding and said, “Um Johnny Depp, he’s pretty good.  I want to see that Aunt Heather.  I like Johnny Depp.”  What?  I didn’t even know Kyle knew who Johnny Depp was, let alone liked him!  All I could say was, “I like Johnny Depp too, ok we can go see it.”  We also saw the preview for Avengers, which comes out this weekend.  Kyle is totally pumped for this movie, of course so am I.  He already made our plans for Saturday.

Kyle's socks don't match & he can't manage to keep his shoes on 11/18/11

As the movie unfolded Kyle watched it in his usual Kyle way, squealing and talking the entire way through it.  I about died when he kept calling Peeta, Peter!  I corrected him but I don’t think he heard me and I gave up.  Right after the movie, Kyle decided he wanted to read The Hunger Games trilogy.  That’s my little man, he’s getting bigger.  He even asked me if the book was like the movie?  I went through some details and highlights just to give him an idea.  Then he started to give me a dissertation on how the Harry Potter books aren’t exactly like the movies.  He was comparing and contrasting, my favorite way to write!  ‘What is this?’ I thought, Kyle really does have a major opinion about books and movies.  It’s really fun watching his intellect grow and mature and hearing things from his point-of-view.  So far I’ve loved all stages of Kyle, but this one is really integrating me.

Gigi, Kyle and me at the Gutchess picnic at Idlewild Park

Kyle’s always been a thinker.  He truly thinks things through.  Taking you back about eight years when Kyle was in his twos, he was even a thinker then.  Loving my naps, one day I chose to engage in one of my favorite pastimes on the couch.  I guess while I was sucking up the ‘ZZZs’ Kyle turned to my mom and said, “Gigi I want long legs like Aiya.”  Mom said that I looked elongated laying flat on my back, not to mention I must of looked like a giant compared to Kyle’s miniature structure all stretched out over the surface of the couch.  Ever since then, his logic was to compare my legs to height.  He still does this today, standing beside me measuring his legs against mine.  His goal is to reach my height, my all of five foot six inches.  I’ve told him that he better hope for a few more inches.  After all he just may get it, my brother was about six foot.

Even though Kyle is such a little boy, and an immature one at best, he occasionally shows the adult peeking out in him.  Although, I hope he always keeps that inner child!  Of course if he’s really anything like me, he will!