Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose.  ~Kevin Arnold

Kyle sitting on his bed in his room (Ryan’s old room) with the quilt I made him out of Ryan T-shirts & flannels 2002

You know it’s funny how time flies.  It might sound cliché, but it’s so very true.  I can’t believe Kyle will be twelve years old in seven days, July 30, 2001!  I was there when he was born and I pushed his dad out of the way to let me hold my perfect little nephew.  True story.  I really wanted to hold the baby and Ryan said, “I want to hold him.”  Followed by me working the bundle into my arms and Ryan giving me his ornery grin.  I think it was more of joy and happiness than irritation, but Ryan gave in to let me hang with my future buddy.

Over the years, even long before the birth or our little man “stuff” seems to get collected.  Sometimes you’re not sure why you have all this “stuff” and sometimes you know very well why it’s kept, for simple sentimental reasons.  Regardless, that “stuff” does carry a bit of history with it and me being a history buff, I love to preserve history.

Ryan passed away on October 23, 2001.  Naturally, his “stuff” was kind of pushed into closets and stacked in corners.  No one really wanted to deal with it at the moment, or even months later.  Some of the piles included Ryan’s cloths, mostly his T-shirts and flannels, the staple of his wardrobe.

The majority of his attire was purchased by yours truly as gifts for Ryan.  Every time he changed the oil in my car, rotated the tires, cut the rotors, changed the windshield wipers, (the list goes on and on), I would repay him with cloths, since Ryan never accepted money from me.  Never!  It was a win win because Ryan didn’t really purchase himself cloths,.  So I took it upon myself to dress him in exchange for all is work.  He would graciously accept the articles of clothing, especially the jeans.

Tight shot of Kyle’s quilt, while it was being made. Those are all of Ryan’s T-shirts & flannels! 2002

You see Ryan was a tall lean beanpole, a strong one at that, still thin.  His jeans, which had to be Levi’s, needed to measure 29 x 34.  Do you know how hard it was to find those?  So every time I was in the store, I would raid the men’s jeans department in search for Ryan’s jeans.  This saved him the trouble of trying to find them himself,  a real scavenger hunt!

Yes, so all my shopping for Ryan, eventually made their way to untouched sad piles of fabric with an unknown future.  No matter how simple it may sound, those pieces of clothing showed their history and was a part of Ryan, every stain, every tear, every wrinkle, every shirt logo.   I mean, the shirts literally showed Ryan’s likes and interests, almost like they were a living ghost of Ryan laid before our eyes.  Some of the T-shirts were so worn out you could tell they were his favorites.  Now what?  What do I do those these simple treasures?

I had a lot of help with the final assembly of this massive quilt. Holly (Quilts by Reese) is in the lower right corner with her back turned, hard at work! Her soon to be husband to her right. 2002

Over the months of healing after Ryan’s passing, I held onto these small memories, which I had no idea what to do with.  I mean, I wasn’t going to wear them, but on the other hand it would have broken my heart to give them away or worse, trash them.  What to do?  What to do?   Then, my friend Christina, yes the same one I would run around like a bee and press cloths with our bums, (Gotta Dance!)  came to me and presented the best idea I have EVER heard!  She said, “I know what you can do with your brothers cloths!  Turn them into a quilt!”  Brilliant!!  Sincerely, the presented solution was like gold to my ears and for a brief moment, I remembered how to be happy.   Joy filled me and I couldn’t wait to share this revelation with my family.  I knew they were going to love the idea as much as I did.  And you know what?  They DID!

At the time, I don’t think Christina knew what that idea meant to me and my family.  Being in a state of loss, confusion and grief, any small ray of light was most welcome and needed!  Now, where to begin?  You see I never made a quilt before.  In fact, at the time I didn’t even have a sewing machine.

Kyle playing on the pillow I made him out of the extra fabric from the curtains I made, sitting next to the quilt made out of his dad’s T-shirts & flannels, given for his 1st birthday. 2002

Problem solved.  That Christmas my family bought me a sewing machine.  Like I said, they were excited about the future quilt.  Now I have the equipment, what do I do with it?

Over the years, I’ve sewn Halloween costumes, hemmed pants, and such, but never a blanket and certainly not a quilt.  Well, me being me, I decided to take on the challenge and make it my spring project.  It was now a mission to complete it and give it to Kyle for his first birthday.

It took me months to cut everything out.  On a side note, to actually begin cutting into these priceless T-shirts almost made me sick, but it needed to be done to get to the final goal.  Yet, it was hard.  Once I decide how I wanted the T-shirts laid out and how I wanted to incorporate the flannel shirts, then I painstakingly sowed each piece to the next to create smaller shapes.  Then, those smaller shapes turned into larger shapes until it started resembling a quilt.

Kyle’s full quilt, gave it to him for his 1st birthday. Loved how it turned out! Kyle’s dad’s T-shirts & flannels. 2002

All along the way I will admit, it became very therapeutic.  Sitting there by myself sewing for hours, holding onto pieces of Ryan actually made me feel better.  I’m not sure if it’s because I had such an intimate relationship with some of those shirts beforehand, or I was able to put my self in a different mindset, but the hard work gave me hope that things will be fine.  Never better, just different and manageable, and more importantly Ryan would never be forgotten.  Similar to writing in my blog.  Still neither are like holding Ryan’s son, the closest most dearest part of Ryan we still have.

Unbeknownst to me at the time, this perceived small project turned into a king size quilt!  Yes I didn’t have the heart to omit certain T-shirts, they were all so dear to Ryan.  To be honest, the final quit was actually larger than a king size.  On another note, I didn’t know that until I was pretty much done.  I kind of kept going and going, deep in thought until I reached the final edges of the quilt.

Holsters, Kyle’s Aunt Hot Dogs, playing with a 6 month old Kyle. 1/2002

Throughout the process, many of my friends helped me with the assembly of the quilt and supplied their opinions and advice, especially my friend Holly (Holsters).  Ironically, she now sews quilts, specializing in T-shirt quilts, as a side job.  Her quilts are far more superior than my creation.  Maybe I should have let her help more with my project.  She really has a talent with quilting, check her creations out on Facebook .  Her quilts are even sold internationally!

The quilt was by all means not perfect, not in the slightest, but that blanket was made with all my LOVE!  It was made to give a piece of my brother to his son for his first birthday.  It was made to preserve Ryan in a visual piece for the entire family to appreciate.

During the duration of the assembly, my place looked like a sweat shop. Literally!  Sitting on a stool in front of my sewing machine for hours upon hours, trying to get all the puzzle pieces together to resemble a bed covering, while maintaining the integrity of the fabric, was not an easy task.  I had stacks upon stacks of cut fabric and piles of miscellaneous remnants.  What drove me?  Kyle’s birthday deadline.

To give me an extra challenge, the end of May that year, I went on a cruise with a bunch of friends and than two weeks before Kyle’s birthday, I was in Korea.  Yes, I was competing in the World Haidong Gumdo Championships (samurai sword).  As part of my very memorable trip, I also trained and toured sections of the peninsula.  Great experience, even though I was completely off the grid and missing my little man so much!

Close up of Kyle’s quilt that I made for his 1st Birthday out of his dad’s T-shirts & flannels. 2002

Unfortunately, because of the timing of my Korean trip, I couldn’t give the long anticipated gift to Kyle on his actual birthday.  Believe it or not, that broke my heart, even though I know he would never know or care.  If I’m recalling correctly, I think I got home the day after his official birthday, but as soon as I got off of the plane and mom picked me up, we took a detour to head straight to see Kyle before heading home.  Even before I stopped to get some American food back in my system, we made a beeline to see my little man, who was already a year old.  Officially I gave him the quilt that weekend.

Kyle’s very first birthday gift from me was a homemade king sized quit, made from my very own fingers from his dad’s wardrobe.  I guess in a way, the blanket was from his dad too!

I’m really blessed to have gone through this exercise of making a quilt.  I’ve never made one since and I never plan on it.  After all, I have  to do that!  But I certainly do cherish the work I put into it and appreciate the opportunity to clear my mind.  Plus, I hope one day, Kyle will realize just how much he meant to me from day one, for me go through all that trouble and effort to make him a quilt straight from his dad, for his very first birthday.  In a way, that blanket started the tradition of giving Kyle unconventional gifts!

And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.”  And he answered, “What is it, Teacher?”  “A certain creditor had two debtors; one owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty.  When they could not pay, he forgave them both.  Now which of them will love him more?”  Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, to whom he forgave more.”  And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.”  ~Luke 7:40-43

George Zimmerman – Closing Arguments Held In Zimmerman Trial 2013

The entire human race sins!  Fact!  It is also our obligation to point out the sins of others and to have them answer for it, but it is not our place to pass judgment, especially after a court ruling.  Instead we should pray for one another and we should help our fellow brothers and sisters, getting them back on the right track.

Why the heck am I on this topic?  Simply because of the finger pointing, all the judgements and threats, and all the negativity and the violence and hate that has stemmed from this behavior.

Yep, I’m talking about the famous George Zimmerman – Trayvon Martin case.  Just to recap (since this blog is for my nephew to read later in life, I always try to give details to help him revisit history) on February 26, 2012, in Sanford, Florida, George Zimmerman, a 28-year-old mixed race of Hispanic American, fatally shot Trayvon Martin, a 17-year-old African American high school student.  The ruling was just announced this past Saturday that Mr. Zimmerman was found not guilty, it was an act of self defense.

Just to get this clear from my point-of-view, that if someone, anyone a teenager or an old person, attacked me, pushed me down and began to beat my head off of cement, telling me that he or she was going to kill me, I would take that seriously.  Hopefully, all my survival instincts would kick in and I would have done the same, without hesitation!  I would have pulled the trigger.

Was George Zimmerman completely justifiable?  Yes he can be faulted for approaching the kid when he was instructed not to, but he did what he was suppose to do, he called the police first and reported the suspicion.  He didn’t just go guns a blazing at this suspicious kid, wearing a dark hoodie, milling around between houses in the rain, at night, appearing as if he was on drugs.  If I was George, I would have done the same, especially since the neighborhood was experiences break ins and violence thrusted upon them.  Imagine if Zimmerman would have just walked way and later found out that the kid killed or hurt someone?  That’s what would be running through my head, especially in the case of the unknown at the time.  I would feel it was my responsibility to step in and help take action to protect my family and friends.

As for caring a gun.  He was completely legal and within his rights to do so!  Apparently, he never really felt safe if he always carried the firearm with him, except to work.  Sometime before this case, he was interviewed and said that a robber fled the scene in his neighborhood, right through his property while his wife was home.  Yes!  That would mean something to me too!  And that would stick in my mind forever!

Let’s step back and really get to the heart of the matter.  First of all, what self-respecting child, calls another a cracker?  I would have never done that EVER!  I was taught to respect others and their property.  So with that out in the open, I would never have been hanging out in the rain if I wasn’t up to no good.  And what kid, who is innocent, attacks another?  Sure, kids will be kids, getting into trouble, but if that was me and my cousins, we would have set off running, even if we just wrong on the account of trespassing.  But never in a million years would we have attacked another, unless there was more to it, than kids being kids.  I can’t help but think, Mr. Martin was up to more than just passing through.  Of course, it doesn’t make a difference now, and that’s total speculation and not my place to judge.

Rioting in LA from the George Zimmerman verdict 2013

So now my next thought, why are people rioting?  Seriously?  Especially in California, the whole way across the United States, not even close to Florida.  Does looting and destroying private property make everything better?  Does damaging those hard working citizens’ businesses help you get your own way?  When did two wrongs EVER make a right?  My guess there are some deep seated issues residing in some individuals and they are just looking for an excuse.  Again back to respect.  Respect for our fellow neighbor and our brothers and sisters!  Those property owners weren’t involved in the crime, they weren’t even in the same time zone!  I think there are a lot of unbalanced people and I believe there are a lot of lackeys who thrive on violence and supply this anarchy to those in control, simply for a good show.  The media and some celebrities make that list of the guilty.

On a side note, if any of those rioters are on welfare, then technically they are working for the government.  Then, that means the government, Mr. Obama who is the leader, is destroying our own country from within and its hard working citizens.  Isn’t that like a dictatorship?  If the government insists on getting its own way, and disregards the decisions made by a selected jury and our courtrooms, that means the people truly don’t have a voice.  That means one of our branches of government is ruled by the other, our president.  In essence a dictatorship. I know that seems far fetched, but is it?

On the same thought, why is the government stepping in?  What, they have a say so to overrule the judge and the fair jury because they don’t like the decision?  Wake up people!  The government is already spying on us, they have controlled us through our finances with the IRS, which insistently will be controlling our healthcare decisions through the medicare audits, and now you are welcoming them in to overstep the decisions of a fair jury?  We are just handing over our freedom left and right because some want the government to control the legal system?  I’m not saying any branch of office is one hundred percent fair and unbiased, but don’t keep throwing fuel to the already blazing inferno.  The court ruled and that should be the end of it!

Do I feel bad for the Trayvon Martin family?  Absolutely!  I know first hand the pain that comes from loosing a family member too soon and so suddenly.  My heart bleeds for them, but continuing this quest for their own way, still does not make it right.  Yes it’s tragic, but instead of selling your soul to the government to get your own way, maybe everyone needs to step back and really look at the situation.  Although, I know it’s hard, with the grief and the shock of the verdict at hand, but it will help to find peace.

Blaming race is also not the answer.  How can we, as Americans ever get past racial violence and issues, if it’s always thrown out there.  I mean, how is the next generation going to learn this, which is a learned behavior, if it is not taught?  Stop the hate lesson, then the hate will stop!  After all, George Zimmerman was not even a white man, he is Hispanic.  And if I am correct, that race is a minority too.  So what idiot started to play the race card, my guess because there was nothing else, yet got their facts wrong?  Is there really a need to destroy other lives through violence?  It doesn’t change anything, doesn’t stop life from moving on, and doesn’t change the future.  It just makes us barbarians.

I didn’t see any rioting when OJ Simpson was let off.  My opinion he was as guilty as guilty can be.  Nope, that circus courtroom and all the lies was accepted and ruled on, and there were two innocent murders committed on their own property.  Again, completely innocent people do not act out of control, violent and desperate for an escape.  So why the famous high speed chase in the white broncho?  When I heard that ruling all I thought was, ‘Well, God will judge’.  And look at Mr. Simpson’s life since.  Not a healthy one, maybe the guilt is consuming him?

Rioting in LA from the George Zimmerman case verdict

Ok, may that was too long ago for some of us to really remember or care about, but what about the Casey Anthony trial?  Casey Anthony was on trail for the murder of her two-year-old daughter, Caylee Anthony in Orlando Florida.  Again to recap and refresh the memories of many, the maternal grandmother reported the child missing for over a month and said Casey’s car smelled like a dead body.  That was on July 15, 2008.  Casey gave many falsehoods as to the whereabouts of the child including telling the authorities that her daughter was kidnapped.  On October 2008, she was charged with first degree murder and pleaded not guilty.  Later the court ruled on July 5, 2011, and the jury found Casey not guilty of first degree murder, aggravated child abuse, and aggravated manslaughter of a child.  However she was found guilty of four misdemeanor counts of providing false information to a law enforcement officer.  Using her credit for time served, she was released on July 17, 2011.

Was I mad?  Sure, but I also have faith.  I have faith that justice is always served.  I have faith still in our court systems, even though we know it’s corrupt at times.  I also have faith, that good prevails.  Never, did I ever even think of rioting or steeling from business owners.  Is looting an act of demonstrating or is it a selfish act for the personal gain of oneself?

Later that year on December 11, 2008, the little girl Caylee’s skeletal remains were found.  They were wrapped in a blanket inside a trash bag in the wooded area near the family home.  There was duct tape across the mouth on the child’s skull.  Did I mention that after all the lies, they were trying to prove the little girl drown in the pool accidentally?

Yet after all this, where people outraged?  Sure, but not like whats happening with the George Zimmerman case, with all the violence and damage and threats.  The Casey Anthony case was not in question of self defense, it was a blatant attempt of getting away with murder.  Yet she got off!  I was not in the courtroom, I was not on the jury, and I may not have agreed with the verdict, but I do agree with those who made the decision.  End of case, start moving on!

We need to continue to trust our court systems, albeit they are not perfect, but it’s better than anarchy and counter to radical thinking and radical actions of those on the streets.  That’s when the innocent are really going to get hurt, no matter their color.

Aunt
She isn’t my mother.
She isn’t my sister.
She’s one of the family
Who’s more like a friend.
Aunt
She has fun with me,
laughs with me,
listens to me, encourages me.
Aunt
She spends time with me,
believes in me,
shares with me, cheers for me.
Aunt
She understands me like a mother.
She’s there for me like a sister.
And perhaps best of all –
she loves me like a friend. ~Kimberly Rinchart

Me & Kyle at Idlewild for the Gutchess Picnic

My little man, what else can I say? I’ve reviewed how Kyle resembles my brother – his dad, my sister – his Aunt Nikki, my dad – his pappy, and my mom – his Gigi. There are a lot of cross over similarities and yet there are some traits that are distinctly a particular person.

Does Kyle resemble me at all? He sure does! Yes it’s true, Kyle is more of the engineering mind, but he is also a rare bread, complete with innovation, a strong personality, social skills and a  business visionary.

Obviously, Kyle’s physical traits don’t really resemble mine much. I will admit we do have the same type of skin, at least at this point in his life.  Also our noses.  We both have the perfect button noses.  A trait I’ve claimed as ours.  As for all other physical traits, you can’t even tell he’s related to me, our body types are different.  We don’t stand the same, or walk the same, and our outward presentations are not similar, not in the slightest.  If we talk about personality traits, now we’re getting somewhere!

As a baby just learning to walk, Kyle was always very structured.  What I mean is that everything had to be perfectly aligned.  Perfectly!  Kyle loved his Matchbox Cars, literally having hundreds of them. He would take the cars out one-by-one, examine them, and then line them up on the coffee table in rows. Every car was facing the same direction, front bumper to back, in perfect lines, until the entire coffee table was covered in Matchbox Cars.  That’s all he would do until it was time to put them away. Well, except if I was being ornery.

Me & Kyle screwing around with my sunglasses 11/18/03

Once when Kyle was nearly finished placing the cars, I waited for the perfect time for him to look away to retrieve another car.  I took my foot and pushed the coffee table over so the cars slid off and all landed on the floor. I know it sounds mean, but the look on his face was hilarious!  He was first in complete shock like he just witnessed an earthquake for his cars.  Then, as he noticed my foot still on the evidence, a complete realization of what just happened settled in.  His nose crinkled, his face soured, and he came over to me and begin to push my foot off the side of the table saying “No Aiya! No!”  Making it very clear that this was no acceptable behavior.  He looked like my sister when she gets angry with me!  I know, it’s not nice to tease, but it’s good to shake things up with these engineers.  Keeps it real.

Kyle not only aligned his cars but also his juice boxes in the refrigerator.  They had to be right side-up, facing front in a perfect line on the shelf. Let me tell you about convenience stores. If I would extract a bottle of water from inside the cooler, Kyle would realign the bottles making sure all the labels were facing out.  If the second bottle didn’t slide down to the front, then Kyle would help it along.  Bystanders that have actually witnessed this behavior, smiled at the precious narcissistic little boy.  I will admit, I tend to have the same disposition, everything orderly, tidy and aligned.  I do notice details, as does Kyle, and sometimes the smallest things drive me crazy.  Although, Kyle tends to be very selective with his details and neatness.  He is not always consistent but the natural tendencies are certainly there.

Granted as Kyle grows and as he is presented with different situations, he shows traits from all of us, including his business mind. Not everyone has the ability to be structured and think out of the box and use forward thinking.  My brother had a business mind, as does my dad and both equally have the work ethic to accompany such talents.  I do believe I possess these traits as well, similar to Kyle.  He has this unique thinking of setting and accomplishing goals and the ability to understand the idea of profit while maintaining the integrity of business.  A regular businessman.  How do I know?  I’m not just making a broad statement.  He has proved it through the interaction and assistance of my company The Piper Corporation (Thrill of the Hunt, SpyRing).  Yes with the little involvement he has had, he has shown me all these traits.  He is also a natural leader and he knows how to (and does without any quorums) delegate.  Once I teach him to properly follow up and address everyone with respect, and learn how to really utilize resources, he will be a force to reckon with.  I just hope I am able to instill a good work ethic and appropriate business practices with good moral intentions.

Me & Kyle at Idlewild… he is always a lot of fun at every age!  I love his perfectly round head!

Kyle’s people skills are pretty impressive!  He knows how to use his manners and speak directly to others.  Granted, sometimes he is a bit too direct, but like me, I love the candor and tend to steer in that direction.  Again as he matures, I can see his social skills tightening up and sharpening.  He already knows how to work a crowd to get their attention and to get what he wants, similar to his Aunt Heather.

As much as Kyle thinks, and he is a thinker, he forgets to think equally as much.  This behavior tends to get us both in sticky situations.

We both love to fish and I will admit, like Kyle, if I’m doing something I like, I want to perfect it and practice beforehand. Story time! Once when I was in elementary school, probably a little younger than Kyle is now, I decided to go outside and take advantage of the nice day and practice casting my fishing pole.  At the time mom had a dogwood tree in the middle of the yard.  Why is this relevant?  Because as I repeatedly cast my pole, I would caught a branch and have to pull my line out.  One would think that I would have just moved away from the tree, after all I had an entire yard.  But nope, I stood my ground until I cast my line in the top of the tree and couldn’t pull it out.   Yikes!  I didn’t know what to do.  Naturally the smart thing to do would have to cut the line.  Not me!  Instead I decreased the slack on the line and pulled the entire pole toward the top of the tree.  Yes, I let the fishing pole hang there in the dogwood tree.  Later that day, when dad came home from work, he noticed it instantly and asked no one in particular, in a very even toned voice, “Why is there a fishing pole in the tree?” I said, “I was practicing my casting and it got stuck.”  Nonchalantly dad replied, “Well don’t you think you better get it out?”  I knew I should, but for the life of me I didn’t realize at the time, breaking the line was an option, that is until weeks later when dad did just that.

Me & Kyle rocking the night away at Chad’s Wedding

Sometimes Kyle goes on his one track-mind and doesn’t bother to open his eyes to those around him.  I’m sure this will change as he grows, after all he is a sincere caring kid.  He is not malicious in anyway.  Although, I do the same, but it’s only because my mind is usually focused on other things, probably similar to Kyle’s.  At this point in his life, I would put my life on it, that it’s Legos!  Over the years, I can’t even tell you how many people would say they saw me, and I NEVER saw them.  Even if I walked right past them.  This happens a lot when I’m driving.  Hopefully, I’m concentrating on road, although I’m guessing my mind is wondering elsewhere, but not towards Legos.

Kyle’s a dreamer too.  Not just uses his imagination, which he totally does, but he is a visionary.  He always creates these grandiose ideas of how something should be, or how it will be or how it’s going to unfold.  I tend to be that dreamer too.  But I do believe that’s a great quality to have, especially being an entrepreneur.  Dreaming big is never a bad thing, just failure to act on it is.

There are so many more comparisons including the love of snow!  We both enjoy sled-riding, snowboarding and the crisp cool days.  Neither one of us like to be hot and we certainly don’t enjoy sweating, even though he does more than me.

We both love to cook and to experiment with ingredients.  Maybe more me than Kyle, but we love to try new foods and learn and understand different culture.

And like the rest of the family, there is one trait we all posses besides believing in God.  I don’t mean to omit the big Guy because to me that’s a standard, however I’m learning it’s not the case with most people.  But this time I’m talking about TRAVELING!  We are all equally intrigued by the rest of the world, new sights and the sense of adventure.  None of us has ever been afraid to explore and my parents have always encouraged this behavior.  Which speaking of, this week is ‘Aunt Nikki and Kyle’s Week of Fun!’  They are doing a road trip tour of the New England States.  How fun!  Next trip, I’m going to sneak my way in on the action!

I guess Kyle is a little bit of each of us, making him the perfect mix!  He’s a little bit country and a little bit rock n’ roll.  (That’s for mom’s benefit!)

Read the complete list of comparisons

Who Does Kyle Favor More, His Dad?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Pappy?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Aunt Nikki?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Gigi?

You educate a man; you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.  ~Brigham Young

Kyle’s 2nd day of Lego Camp at Saint Vincent College – Bricks 4 Kidz Program 6/25/13

Most people celebrate their birthday the day of their actual birth, or sometime close.  Others take a week or so in preparation and to celebrate the anniversary of their birth.  I really do neither, I’ve never been much of a birthday person.  Seriously, I could care less about my birthday, except it also happens to be my parents wedding anniversary (I was born six years after they were hitched).  Going out to eat, or birthday cakes and such never appealed to me.  Well, cake certainly peeks my interest, but not the celebration.  Yes, as a child I loved to get presents, but it wasn’t like it is today.  Even back then, I remember asking mom to stop the birthday parties.  Just not a big fan.

Kyle on the other hand is a big supporter of birthday celebrations, specifically his own.  Literally, from December 26th up until his day of birth, July 30th, he is preparing, scheming and throwing hints left and right.  Keep in mind, Easter falls between this time and he gets more gifts, not to mention his report card money that tends to go toward more Legos.  But his birthday, day, opens his eyes and fills his head with possibilities like no other.

Keeping with tradition, I never get Kyle toys or video games, basically what he asks for.  Nope!  I get him unconventional gifts.  They are items that I believe give him skills, introduces him to thinking differently, gives him life long knowledge or interests and helps him to grow as a person.  Others, mostly my parents and my sister get him the items that make his childhood bucket list of desirables.  (Happy Lego Birthday Kyle – 11 Years Old!, Flying Back to Kyle’s Ninth Birthday, Family Time Through an ipod Touch, Happy Birthday Kyle- 10 Years Old!)  I’ve mentioned it in the past about buying him piano lessons, swimming lessons, flying lessons, books etc.  So what to do for his twelfth birthday?

Starting to mill around ideas in my head back in May, which is when Kyle started to throw out hints, I really had no clue.  I’ve been known to give him a saving bond, again another practical gift to force him to save for the near future, but I really wasn’t sure.  Then, thanks to a family friend, Lori Planinsek Rodgers, she gave me the perfect idea!  Lego Camp!

She mentioned it while we were at the 24th Annual Planinsek Fishing Derby, Gone Fishing!.  At the time I just thought it might be something fun Kyle would enjoy, so I mentioned it to him.  Naturally, anything with Legos causes the kid to jump out of his skin.  Well, that is until he found out he doesn’t get to keep the Legos he builds.  Too bad!  Looking online into the programs, the light came on in my head and bingo, his birthday present was established.

Yes, another Lego even while at Lego camp – Bricks 4 Kidz at Saint Vincent College. That was his report card money courtesy of his Aunt Nikki 6/27/13

This gift accomplished more than just his gift.  Kyle always loved going to daycare (Come and Play) every summer.  He truly looked forward to hanging out with his friends and playing.  The kids not only played, but the daycare ladies  would make them bring books to read and they would have to go outside and run around and do some schoolwork.  Kyle’s days were very planned, very organized and very structured.  All the qualities that make for an enjoyable day for Kyle, truly!  Well, this summer Kyle didn’t go to daycare.  He was seriously bummed and bored!  I wish he was sent at least a couple of days a week, but nope, his summer consisted of hanging by himself at home.  That’s when I thought to send him to camp.  Granted the kid takes more vacations then any other child I know, but it still stinks to sit at home by yourself, not being mentally or physically challenged and being socially deprived.

Originally, I was going to sign him up for the third week in July, bringing it closer to his birthday, but alas that week was the ‘Aunt Nikki and Kyle’s Week of Fun’.  No good!  So I had to work backwards deciding on the week of June 24th through June 28th, last week.

Signing Kyle up for Animal Grossology in the am session (8:30-11:30) and Space Adventure – Star Wars for the afternoon session (1:00-4:00) at Saint Vincent College in Latrobe, all I could think of was how excited he was going to be.

Kyle received 2 certificates for finishing his Bricks 4 Kidz Lego Camp at Saint Vincent College. Animal Grossology & Space Adventure- Star Wars 6/28/13

Keeping the Lego camp a secret, I alerted the rest of the family and I made arrangements for us both to stay at my parents house all week, which made my parents really happy.  They were looking forward to his Lego camp too for two reasons.  One, to spend the week with Kyle and two, to share in his excitement, knowing how much he loves to build Legos and being challenged.

Leading up to the birthday present surprise, I started to prod Kyle a bit, although he never really took the bait.  Probably because he knew his gift from me wasn’t exactly what he wanted.  I did tell him he was getting his gift early and it involved animals and space.  That sparked one of our dashboard silly conversations Laughing About Nothing…Dog in Space.  Throughout Kyle’s short life, you would think he would learn to trust me.  Our activities are never items he’s thought about or thinks are fun, but he can never deny he loves the gifts I get him.

One of the hints I slipped him, was that he was going to college and it was an educational gift.  He politely smiled and gave me a grunt.  Then he said, “I can’t go to college, I’m not old enough.”  Love that kid!  I told him he’s going and he better pay attention!  I could tell he didn’t know whether to take me seriously or not.  Sometimes I can be such an instigator.

Sunday night, the eve before Kyle was going to partake in his Lego camp adventure, I told him where he was going.  His eyes lit up and excitement shot over his entire body, leaving his mouth ALL night!  To be honest, I was trilled at his enthusiasm but it was getting late and I was tired.  He kept speculating on  what he was going build and what he was going to do.  He commented, how much he loved animals and told me how much he knows about animals.  Then he went into his dissertation on space and Star Wars.  It was a long night until the sandman knocked Kyle out.

Kyle his a great little guy! Check him out helping another, at the Bricks 4 Kidz Lego Camp at Saint Vincent College! 6/24/13

The next morning and all week he was up early, got himself his breakfast and got dressed, all without incident.  The first day was a bit rough, especially at lunch.  I packed us a lunch and thought we could picnic at Saint Vincent College and then walk around a bit.  I wanted to share with Kyle, some of what I remembered Father Alred teaching us about the buildings and the history when I was in the sixth grade at Sacred Heart.  (I found out that I remember very little and need to research the college again to bring back what I knew.)  Kyle was very quiet and almost blasé about his morning and kind of complained about his lunch.  Then, he didn’t want to walk around, didn’t want to sit, didn’t really care to go back.  I was in complete shock and let’s face it, irritated.  Only because I thought Kyle didn’t appreciate this opportunity.  Keep in mind it was pretty hot and humid out.

I dropped Kyle off for his afternoon class and then picked him up at 4:00.  Same attitude, same almost lethargic demeanor.  At this point, I thought Kyle was getting sick or maybe he was tried from getting to bed so late and waking up pretty early.  That is until the next day brought me my answers.

As I dropped him off for his morning session, I spoke to the one teacher to see how Kyle was doing.  She informed me that the room was really hot and evidently since it was an old building, putting the air conditioning on cool meant they were turning on the heater!  Yikes!  Kyle was sitting in not only a hot room, but it was being heated too!  No wonder he was so miserable.  The kid HATES being hot.  Not that I can blame him.

Kyle loved the Bricks 4 Kidz Lego Camp at Saint Vincent College! 6/26/13

By the time I picked Kyle up for lunch on Tuesday, it was like he did a one eighty!  He was ecstatic, energetic and completely excited to tell me about his day and what he built!  I was so happy I didn’t make a mistake with the  Lego Camp.  I did not!  It was a hit, now that the temperature in the room was bearable.

What a great week!  Everyday, Kyle and I ate breakfast together; then I dropped him off for his morning class; picked him up for lunch, which we made and ate together; dropped him off for his afternoon session and then picked him up when his day was done.  Actually, everyday except Friday, mom picked him up for me since I was getting the Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt ready for the following day.  (For my company Thrill of the Hunt)  That was the start of the Dog Gone Irony!

Kyle had a GREAT time!  He not only got to feed his addiction of  building Legos, but he fed the brain too with animal knowledge and space talk.  As much as Kyle won’t admit to it, he loves to learn and discover new things and experiences, much like the rest of my family.  Lori, who introduced me to the  Program, messaged me this:

I see you’ve been busy dog hunting the past couple days, but I’m wondering if you’ve had a chance to see any of the videos posted for Bricks 4 Kidz! Looks like Kyle loved the programs! His teacher brought their entire class (5 or 6 kids) up to our class to show us how Kyle put a motor on the kangaroo (which wasn’t in the plans) and made it move – WHAT A GENIUS! I was proud of him and he’s not even mine!

Kyle surprises me all the time and makes me proud too!  He is a bright young man, that will no doubt shine in his future endeavors, whatever they may be.

He was an absolute jewel the entire week!  Seriously, the happiest and most non-argumentative child.  Everyday he came home and practiced his piano and read in his book.  Then he would watch some of his Lord of the Rings movies, watched a little TV or played with one of his many Legos.  He never complained about dinner and ate some of his veggies.  He even showered every night with little resistance and brushed his teeth without being asked, morning and night.  He was in a routine of structure, family, and good eating habits.  Believe it or not, it made the world of difference on his attitude.

I highly recommend the Lego camp or any of the offered classes!  The teachers are really great to deal with, they have such a positive attitude and the benefits the children receive are priceless.  I’m not just talking about learning to build, but the socialization, the structure, the added knowledge and the attention are so good for the kids.  Kyle was looking into other Lego classes and wants me to sign him up for more.  If he can fit it into his busy schedule, I totally will!

Thanks Lori!  You saved my birthday gift dilemma and brought so much more to one little boy than you can imagine!  You really are a true teacher through and through.

Below is a video I took of Kyle.  I creeped into the classroom, while he was still playing with his creation of the day.  The kid was in complete glory!

My little dog
a heart-beat
at my feet  ~Edith Wharton

They always say when it rains it pours.  Sometimes that’s the case, it certainly was this past weekend, starting Friday morning.

Let me set the stage.  I’ve been developing and organizing the Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt all month, getting ready to launch our first Thrill of the Hunt scavenger hunt event in Shadyside.  So if you can image, there’s a lot of details and last minute items that need addressed.  All week I was unable to take the dogs, Scooby and Seven, for their daily three mile hike.  That’s my normal lunch break now-a-days.  Plus, keep in mind, Kyle was at his at Saint Vincent College.  My lunches were consumed with Kyle, going to pick him up, getting him lunch and taking him back for his afternoon sessions.  Then, the rest of my day and evenings, I was consumed with plugging away at the Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt.  Busy, busy, busy week.

Then, Friday morning rolled around.  Naturally, I was up early with my head in my work, trying to wrap some items up before having to drop Kyle off at his Lego Camp.  I knew I had to make a trip to Shadyside and meet with the participating business owners before the work day ended, and I had to send brochures to the printers, pick them up and assemble all the Thrill of the Hunt bags for the participants before the day came to a close.  Needless to say, there was a lot on my mind and I was completely pre-occupied.  I’m not making excuses, just outlining the events of the day.

Roughly around 7:00 am, mom emailed me telling me to change Seven’s tracker, the battery was really low.  We use Tagg, which is a great service for tracking our freedom seeking dogs.  Only keeping a tracker on Seven, we’ve found that the buddies travel together so no need to weigh Scooby down.  My response to mom’s email?  “I don’t have time and I’m not planning on taking the dogs for a walk today, I have too much to do!”  Mistake number one!  Then around 7:30 am, Kyle was playing with my cat, Storm, on the porch and he had the front door wide open, without putting up the baby gate.  I was also going back and forth to my car loading it up with needed Thrill of the Hunt paraphernalia.

Then by 8:00 am, we both noticed we were two dogs short!  Around that time, I had to hurry up and update the Piper Reunion postcard and send it to press, since that was sneaking up on us; my friend Holly wanted to run hills and was calling; and mom called to ask me to bring her a large bowl to work.   Yikes!  Too much to do!  Not to mention I had to get Kyle over to his last day of Lego camp by 8:30 am and now the boys are missing.

Seven & Scooby getting some rest after the rescue mission was a success! Poor Seven still had those porcupine quills in his face. Tired pups after 3 days missing. 6/30/13

Right around this very hectic time, mom emailed me giving me the update on the already known missing dogs.  She saw his last check-in was in Ridilliatown, not far from our house, but his tracker died so we really had no idea where their actual whereabouts were.  My response?  They’ll come back.  Did I mention this was when I was in route, between Saint Vincent, to Latrobe and mom’s work?

You see the dogs have a track record of taking off, running through the woods for a few hours and then making their way back home after they are good and tired and completely muddy (Dog Gone).  So who would have thought they would have deviated off of the norm?  Certainly none of us did!  In fact, we thought they would show up on the porch before dark, ready to sit out there punishment under the kitchen table.  That’s were they go when they’re in trouble.  The thinner, crappy doggie beds reside under there, making them really suffer their punishments out. (sarcasm)

Well, needless to say nightfall came and left and no signs of the dogs!  I woke up Saturday morning around 5:00 am to get ready for the Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt to find the house still a little empty.  I hate to say it, but when I talked to mom, who incidentally slept on the couch so she could hear are late night arrivals, I said, “I bet someone shot them!”  Mom agreed.  I know what a horrible thought!  I didn’t say I wanted that to happen, I was just trying to be realistic and prepare myself for the worst.  That’s what happened to my cousin’s dog when we were little, it was terrible!  Jack the dog, came back with half of his jaw shot off!

Speaking of shooting dogs.  That might sound like an over active imagination and not a present day reality, guess again!  When we were going around to the local neighbors where the dogs were once spotted, a lady told us that someone in Youngstown, near Latrobe Pennsylvania is known to shoot stray dogs.  She said they shot one before and wounded another!  Can you believe it?  I understand dog owners have to be in control of their dog at all times, but come on, things happen.  There is no reason to shoot a dog!  Maybe if it was bringing direct harm to another animal or person, sure for self defense, but just because they are loose and running around?  Even if they were on your property, shoo them away!  Don’t just shoot them!  What is wrong with some people?  Apparently, they have no heart and we need to say prayers for them.

Wishing I could have stayed to help with the rescue mission Saturday morning, Kyle and I headed into Pittsburgh for the Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt.  Before I left I had time to make a missing poster and I distributed it to my social sites far and wide.  While we were in Shadyside, the irony of the situation hit me!  I was running a scavenger hunt for dogs, when ours ran away and were lost, called Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt.  Not funny at the time, but has brought new humor.

My poor Seven. Did he put his face directly up a porcupine’s butt? At least he’s home! 6/30/13

The scavenger hunt went really smoothly and was well received by all the participants and business owners.  During the hunt, besides reaching out to our participants via social sites along with my sister, we were  also helping to spread the word, on our very own missing four legged pals.  I was taking calls, and checking Facebook, keeping in touch with my friend Tree who was following up on leads and touching base with my family.  Talk about a lot going on!

As soon as I got back to the area, I joined the search and rescue team.  Getting in the car with mom, we rechecked the the last areas the dogs were spotted, and a few areas we thought they might have gone through.  What made this so difficult was the location of our runaways.  They were running through mostly woods, even worse, mostly unfamiliar woods to me, making their appearance every now-and-again near someones house or a main road.  Even though it was extremely frustrating, each report brought a bit of hope.  At the start of this all, the last place we knew the dogs were located in Ridilliatown, early Friday morning.  Keep in mind it is now Saturday afternoon.

The sightings included:  Someone saw them together off of route 30 near Sleepy Hallow at 6:00 pm on Friday.  Someone saw them near Kingston on Friday around 5:30 pm.  Someone almost hit them with their car off of route 30 near Ligonier around 6:30 pm on Friday.  What?  How did they make it that far coming from Youngstown?

Well, later on Sunday when I hiked the woods in that area, I found out it didn’t take me long to cross the ridges through the woods, only traveling about four miles.  Piece of cake for a couple of four legged travelers.

Then God gave us another bit of hope, Dave Planinsek saw them off his property Saturday morning around 6:15 am.  Great!  They made the night.  He did say it looked like the black one, Seven was foaming at the mouth.  That would explain why the others who spotted our pups said the one looked like he had porcupine quills in his mouth.  My poor Seven!

Seven in the car after we found him, he was lost for 3 days & apparently met a porcupine on the his travels. 6/30/13

Saturday night was fast approaching and nothing, no sign, no word.  I even walked back in unfamiliar woods of Sugarbush, calling the entire mile in and mile out.  Once darkness completely took away my sense of sight, I reluctantly left the woods.  I will admit, it was pitch black and I had about three quarters of a mile to go just to get out of the woods and meet up with dad, who was on the quad.

We arrived at my parents house Saturday night, feeling completely defeated!  Especially knowing the dogs were going to have to spend another night in the woods and knowing that Seven was hurt and possibly Scooby.

That did it!  I had a new game plan.  I woke up early Sunday morning, we went to church the night before because Kyle had to serve mass, and packed my book bag.  I was going to hike all the woods in the area to try and find them.  Our logic, since no one had seen them since Saturday morning, they were hanging out in the woods.  They were injured, tired, hungry, scared and lost.

I packed up my .22 pistol, some food and water, first aide kit and a few other essentials.  I made sure my phone was completely charged so I could check my location on my GPS.  Mom was nervous since I have a track record of getting lost, (Directionally Challenged) but I had no qualms about walking around the woods.  I knew I’d pop out somewhere.  To play it safe, as long as my phone was on, Kyle could find me on Find Friends apps.  Not to mention I was using my RunKeeper app, which Tree and mom had my login information to track my last checked in status.

Breaking some of my RunKeeper records I continued on foot, while dad was on the quad and mom and Kyle were in the car driving around and checking with neighbors and putting up more posters.

This went on for hours on Sunday, it seemed like a lifetime.  When I would make my way to a main road, I would have mom and Kyle come and get me, to drop me off closer to start again.  By Sunday at 1:30 pm, I was with mom and Kyle in the car.  We decided to call dad to see how his progress was going.  When mom was talking to dad trying to outline our next plan of attack, possibly take a break for the time being, dad spotted Scooby!  We were in complete shock!  He called Scooby, and after Scooby recognized dad, he came running over to the quad, leaping up in his lap.  All dad was saying was, “Bring the car around and get him!”  I said, “Where are you?”  His vague reply was, “By the woods.”  Really?  Is this a joke?  “What woods?” I said.  Again, vaguely dad replied, “The ones we were by last night.”  Really?  Again, we were all over the ridge on Saturday.

Scooby just woke up from hours of sleep after being lost for 3 days. He was looking for his buddy who still was not found at this point. 6/30/13

Trying to get dad’s exact location proved to be as difficult as trying to find the dogs because he just wanted to talk to Scooby.  He was even asking our blond pal where his pal Seven was.

Once we picked up Scooby, who had a few porcupine quills in his face, that I plucked out, Scooby fell asleep in the car on the way home.  Then back we went to track down number two doggie delinquent.  Apparently, the one house saw them, just before dad got to their house while he was on the quad, and they tried to call the dogs over.  Scooby came to our good Samaritans, (to my complete surprise)  but Seven was scared and took off (even more of a shock, I thought the opposite).  Now for the first time in days, the dogs are separated.

We looked and looked, to no avail.  Finally, as we were ready to make another pass at the ridge in the car, we got a call from the same house who found Scooby.  Seven was in their yard!  Mom drove like lightening to get there.  Once I saw my obviously distraught, disoriented and in pain pup, I welcomed him with open arms.  He reluctantly came to me, but eventually made his way into the car, for our ride home.

Seven and Scooby are safe back home!  Seven spent Monday at the vets getting those darn porcupine needles out of his face.  I was going to try and remove them like I did once for Scooby (Scooby Meets a Porcupine), but Scooby’s weren’t in for three days.  Seven was also really dehydrated and starving.  I thought it be best to wait out the night and take Seven to the vet first thing in the am.  They weighed him and it seems he lost nearly ten pounds!  Poor pup couldn’t eat or drink or even sleep for that matter, for three days.

The boys were gone from Friday at 7:30 am and Scooby was brought home around Sunday at 2:00 pm, while Seven didn’t make it home till Sunday at 8:00 pm.  He also had to endure another night with the quills in his face before we could take him to the vet on Monday at 8:30 am.  He’s still not quite himself, but he is coming around, at least physically.  Scooby’s really stiff and his paw is proving to be hard to walk on, but he bounced right back.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to call in the sightings of the dogs, and those that tried to help completely strange dogs and unknowns owners!   Your efforts made the world of difference!

While everyone was extremely helpful, I want to give a big thanks to specific people.  One being my friend Tree.  She gave me all the updates of the reported sightings, posted on Action for Animals Facebook, responded back to posts and inquiries, tracked me as I walked through the woods so I didn’t get lost, sent us phone numbers and helped to remind me to keep the faith and reach out to my inner Wonder Woman!  Thanks Tree, you rock!  She was saying prayers and asking for Saint Francis and Saint Anthony to pray for us too.  Then there was mom’s friend Mary, who called all the police departments, local and state and reached out to specific key individuals in the area to spread the word and retrieve updates.  All of the Planinsek’s were most certainly helpful and patient with us driving around their property yelling for our delinquents, and walking and driving our quad through their woods.  The Seminsky’s went out riding around looking for beasts.  Renee Yazvec Hall’s husband and son drove around after seeing the posts on Renee’s Facebook page.  They also offered their services if we needed them, and truly meant it!  And not to mention the fellows from Frowen’s garage went looking with trucks and quads.  Thanks everyone, and those who I did not mention, some taking it upon yourselves to make calls and assist.  Thank you!

Although everyone in the surrounding areas were more than helpful, a big kudos goes to PJ Self and his family.  That young man, saw the dogs and let us know.  Then joined our rescue team on foot and ran through the woods and made a huge circle to look for Seven.  He actually ran.  Seriously, I mean he actually ran!  He even kicked up some deer, I saw them leaping like gazelles through Steiner’s field, while PJ ran along the tree line, miles from his house!  We never asked, he just wanted to help out.  Thank you so very  much!

Thinking about it now, I wonder if our boys learned a lesson?  Somehow I doubt it!  But for now they are safe and sound!

Becoming a grandmother is wonderful.  One moment you’re just a mother.  The next you are all-wise and prehistoric.  ~Pam Brown

Mom & Kyle 8/12/01

Gigi and her Kyle.  When there needs to be a negative comparison it’s usually between these two, for those seemingly unfavorables, appear to stand out.  Yet there is more than meets the eye.

Kyle has always pointed out that he shares Gigi, his Aunt Nikki and his dad’s blue eyes.  I was told, “Ya not you Aunt Heather, you and pappy have brown eyes.”  Yes that’s certainly true, but I didn’t realize his blue eyes made him royalty.   Regardless, Kyle does have really pretty blue eyes and I’m glad that is a shared trait between him, his dad, his Gigi and his Aunt Nikki.

Does Kyle and Gigi both share their aversion for physical activity?  You bet they do!  Even so much as to mope around with their heads down when they have to do a little bit of work, or walk an extra two feet.  It’s complete torture for them.  They both drive me crazy when it comes to that.  Do they both like to complain?  Again, a big YES!  It’s actually kind of funny.  When neither one wants to do something or they disagree, they sort of grunt and make noises.  Dad calls it “Letting the air out of the tires.”  Just to share in this trait, so does Aunt Nikki.

Is that all the similarities between mom and Kyle?  Nope, not even close.  Even though he tends to favor my sister more, and there is no secret that Nicole and mom are a lot alike too, sometimes too much, Kyle did pick up more from his Gigi.

Kyle & his Gigi hanging out c.2003

Besides the physical traits of having the blue eyes and lighter hair color, Kyle also shares some personality traits as well as behavioral ones with mom.

On a side note, I do want to call out that Kyle shares mom’s, dad’s and his dad’s talent for having a sense of direction.  The department Nicole and I miserably fail in.  What a great quality!

Let’s start with innovation.  Yes, mom is such an innovator, if that’s the right word for her.  This goes on all aspects of life.  When it comes to cooking she doesn’t need a recipe, or specific ingredients.  Mom can make a great meal out of cupboard items and miscellaneous food found in the refrigerator, on the fly.  No preparation, no research, just mixing and matching and voila!  A unique meal, that is favorable to the taste buds (as long as she doesn’t burn it).  Kyle is following mom’s knack with food experimentation.  He is certainly taking her lead when he is mixing items together, even something as simple as a smoothie.  Kyle is already breaking away from the standard and the ordinary and is creating his own.  That, I must say takes, guts, talent and skills, maybe a little adventure, which I completely support and encourage.  There has been many a time when I wouldn’t have a said ingredient and mom would say, “Ahh just use this instead.  Not as good but it should be alright.”  The word “should” throws me every time, but I always trust the Gig (our shortened term for Gigi or mom).

Mom is also innovative with everyday household items and situations.  If something is broke or missing, mom can adjust accordingly on the spot to make it work.  Yes sometimes it involves the use of duct-tape.  Her substitutions, however crazy they may appear, usually work.  Kyle can also think out of the box and adjust to to solve a much larger problem.  What really cracks me up, both, mom and Kyle usually think this way to eliminate additional work.  They truly love to take the easy route.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that, except if you will not carry on with an activity because of the perception of it being too difficult due to the laziness mind set.  Once when Kyle was a much smaller tyke, maybe four or fives years old, he said, “I want to build Gigi a robot to help her do housework, so she doesn’t have to.”  Yep, somewhere the Olczak engineering gene resides in both of them.

Usually accompanying innovation are details.  Yes, the smallest part of a plan or story.   When mom is telling a story she will give every minor detail before she gets to the point at hand, always having to prod her along.  Now I know where I get it!  At least my details reside in the form of writing and event planning, another trait of mom’s.  Kyle follows all details, no matter how small, especially when it comes to putting his Lego’s together.  Yes again, that must be an Olczak thing, the tiniest of all details is never overlooked.

Mom is also a passive aggressive person, which is not my favorite by far.  Instead of getting to the point or spitting it out, she will go around and around till you figure out what she wants.  Not me!  I would rather just say it or have someone do me that favor.  I do tend to appreciate candor more than politeness.  Can you guess who else does this?  Yes!  The one and only Kyle Piper.  He will go around and around on a topic or subject without just asking the question or getting to the point.  There have been so many times I’ve said, “Kyle what do you want?!  Just spit it out, I can’t read your mind!”  I’ve always encouraged Kyle to ask, but also not to expect him to get his own way.

Gigi & a little bumblebee Kyle 11-18-03

There is one topic that will get Kyle and his Gigi to spit out their feelings, that’s blood and gore.  Yep, both have a really weak stomach for such things including needles, surgery and even a pronounced scratch.  Can’t say that I understand.  The only thing that really gets to me is feces, which can I be blamed?  I’m talking about real life and not TV drama.  Mom could never stand it when we got hurt, including dad.  Every time one of us broke our leg roller skating (Nicole), nail stuck up the foot (me), sliced our head open from the debarker at the sawmill (Ryan), mom would never look in our direction.  She would either call my cousin Paula who is an RN, or my cousin Karen, who doesn’t mind, or another one of the our family friends in the medical field to inspect the damage, seeing if it was hospital worthy.

Side story.  When I was around five or so, my grandparent’s dog, Lady, bit me along the side of the head, just missing my eye.  Not to mention scratched up my chest pretty good.  Naturally I had to get stitches, without Novocain!  As the doctor had my head turned sideways to apply the stitches that I could see go into my head, I also saw mom in the near distance.  She was sitting in the corner of the emergency room, with her legs crossed, bouncing her one leg up and down, and looking away from me.  Wouldn’t even come near me to hold my hand!  She kept her distance even after all the crying for her.  Yep, mom can’t deal with emergency situations!

Kyle on the other hand, is the exact same!  Last summer I got a bad case of Taking On Poison Sumac.  I had to go to the MedCare to have it looked at.  Yes, it was that bad!  The entire time Kyle, who was trying to be supportive said to me, “Boy Aunt Heather I hope you don’t have to get a shot!  I hate shots.”  Guess what?  Yes, they needed to give me a steroid shot.  Kyle took one look at that needle and about turned green.  It’s not just for other people he has no stomach for blood, for himself too.  If he flosses his teeth too hard and they draw a little bit of blood, forget it!  He’s in complete panic mode.

Maybe it’s the idea of pain that scares them.  Mom and Kyle are both babies when it comes to pain.  Pain upon themselves as well as others.  I’m not saying I like any physical discomfort, but I know I can take quite a bit.  I would rather have pain inflicted on myself than to watch another suffer.  Mom and Kyle, can’t deal with either.  If Kyle gets a scratch he is wailing and thrashing around with perceived pain and agony.  Even from a small one inch long thorn scratch.  Maybe they both have extra sensitive skin.

Dad, me, mom, Nicole & Kyle at Kyle’s First Holy Communion at Sacred Heart Church

Of course, dealing with real life situations are usually accompanied by chaos and panic, I get it.  Neither mom nor Kyle can handle such stressful situations.  They don’t respond to pressure.  But to see it on the big screen?  Even when it’s fake?  Nope, neither one has a stomach for it.

Usually gory and graphic is accompanied with suspense and thriller.  Words that most certainly are not accompanied with mom or Kyle.  Scary movies?  Forget it!  I’ve seen Kyle nearly rip the arm off of the couch when he’s watching a show, and it doesn’t have to be a thriller, any show that causes tension.  Kyle will almost get so engrossed into what he’s watching, it’s like he’s living it.  Mom on the other hand, will bury her face in a pillow like an Ostrich and cover he ears so she is as far removed from the sights and sounds around her.

I don’t get it really.  Mom and Kyle both have a flare for the dramatic.  Remember when I was talking about pain?  Yep that’s usually when their theatrical performances take center stage.  Even if something doesn’t go accordingly, and let’s face it, in life when does it ever, that is their time to drip in drama.  I’m sure many can say the same for me, however I am able to keep a level head in a crisis situation, at least the ones I have experience thus far.  Although, I won’t deny my love of the theatrical arts.

We may seem like we’re being mean because we are blunt and able to call out each others faults, however, I’m glad!  No person is perfect and to truly see another, even a family member, for who they really are is a rare quality.  No ego stroking in the Piper family.  We don’t put on disguises, or act like something we’re not, we accept each other for who they are, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

Read more comparisons

Who Does Kyle Favor More, His Dad?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Pappy?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Aunt Nikki?

Home is where the heart is.  ~Pliny the Elder

Mom, Kyle & dad are packed & heading to Parker Dam. The boys (Seven & Scooby) are in the back. 6/13/13

Making another voyage to Parker Dam this past weekend, proved to be as nice of a time, as our other trips.  It was funny though, for some reason I really payed attention to my neighbors.  First, I’d like to explain that we always camp in the area approved for dogs.  Our favorite spot is lot number 90.  A nice little section out of the way, just outside the woods and near the restrooms and not far from the showers.

On Saturday, when Kyle and I were coming back from the Parker Dam beach, while riding my bike waiting for Kyle to drop his attitude and catch up to me, which incidentally he was moving so slow he could have grew moss, I people watched.  On a side note, I was reminded of something said to me last time we were riding our bikes at Parker Dam.  Kyle said, “Aunt Heather, we are on self propelled two wheel transportation devices.”  I have no idea where that came from, but it shot out of his mouth and almost made me fall off of my bike.  Anyway, as I peddled along, for some reason I really paid attention to the eclectic group of individuals staying on the camp grounds.  Some visitors only stay a night and move on, while others set up camp for what seems like a lifetime.   As different and unique as our fingerprints, same goes for the camp site setups and their dwellings.

Sunday morning it rained at Parker Dam. Look at Nicole heading to the restrooms! I was dying when I saw her…yep she blends. Is she going to the bathroom or hunting? 6/16/13

Looking around at the different types of campers, meaning the vehicle they reside in while camping, not a reference to the person, I was utterly amazed!  Some camp sites are very rugged, getting back to the basics with a simple tent on the ground, while others set up a second home complete with satellite TV and a name plate posted in front of their temporary residence.  To be honest, I never noticed everyone else before.  We tend to stay to our own little rented out corner until it’s time to depart.  Personally, I really don’t care what everyone else it doing.   I, like my family, enjoy a little solitude and peace with nature, however as I peddled along my eyes were wide open.  I couldn’t believe what I saw!  I mean lights strung up in all shapes and sizes including chili peppers and ice-cream cones; a neon palm tree stuck in the ground with pink flamingos positioned all around; potted plants hanging from awnings; and huge tents to fit a wedding party staked to the ground.  Can you believe others take all that extra time for such embellishments while camping?  You better believe it!

I’m a pretty simple traveler no matter the destination Traveling Habits, only taking the essentials, not extra stuff.  That certainly holds true for camping.  Before we left and started packing up the camper, I thought to myself, ‘Boy this is a lot of work just for one weekend.  Is this really worth it for a two hour trip, a three day stay in a camper?’  I can’t imagine how long it takes those elaborate campers to pack up for their weekend stay, let alone set up camp.

You know, at first I can sit back and kind of make fun and laugh, but the more I looked, the more I noticed something, these little pieces of grassy lots holding all this stuff, is a home.  It certainly is that way for us.  In fact, there was a couple of times mom would say, “When we get back home”, meaning our camper.   It’s true what they say, ‘Home Is Where the Heart Is’.  And as I watched everyone have a great time, their heart was fully into camping, maybe not so ruggedly but the experience was there.  It almost made me feel like I was a part of something bigger.

Seven & Scooby are packed & ready to head out to Parker Dam. They love the ride! 6/13/13

My parents had a neighbor, the Davis’ who used to take their RV camping.  They even had an electric golf cart so they could drive around the camp grounds visiting friends and socializing.  We are not that outgoing, but we did manage to break away for our isolation to chit chat with a few of our neighbors, who were nice and very interesting.  The one lady was in a wheelchair, yet she liked to camp, so their beast of a camper called the Wolf Pack folded down in the rear, allowing her to drive her motorized transportation up into her safe haven.

There was another lady walking her dog and kitten.  Yep!  Kitten!  A cute little tiger striped eight week old kitten.  The fury feline walked alongside the lady and her husband, while he walked their dog.  Now that kitten got me to stop and make a friend, as did Kyle.  He was obsessed with the fur ball!  When I told her I also brought my cat, she said, “O ya!  I had to, she’s still on the bottle and I didn’t want to leave her with my other cats.  I thought people would think I’m weird, camping with a cat.”  I totally laughed and said, “Cats are as much apart of the family as dogs are!”  Yep, we were surrounded by interesting and really down to earth people.

The weekend turned out to be another enjoyable trip.   It started off on Thursday night.  Kyle rode up with mom, dad, Seven and Scooby and the camper packed full, while Nicole and I left Friday during the day.  We were suppose to leave Latrobe around nine, however my sister convinced herself it was Saturday and apparently she wakes up later on the weekends.  Me?  I prefer to get up the same time all week long so my body is used to it and it becomes habit. Now I’m not saying I do wake up at 5:00 am every day of the week, but I do set that alarm to keep me in the rhythm.  Anyway, Nicole didn’t get up until around 8:00 am and she had a four hour drive to get me.  What?  Really?  Yep!  She finally got to the house at 1:00 pm and we made it to camp around 3:00 pm.  Not bad, even though I was looking forward to fishing with dad and Kyle in the morning, but no harm done.  Dad said the fish weren’t biting anyway.

Throughout our time at Parker Dam, we did a little biking, a little swimming and playing in the sand at the beach, we traipsed around with the dogs in the creek, made mountain pies and s’mores over the camp fire and relived the last time we were at Parker Dam.  Somewhere between Kyle’s need of an attitude adjustment and the fun and pleasant young man I know, he was singing uncontrollably.  All sorts of songs, including Christmas tunes.  What really brought a smile to my face and a song to the my lips, is when we were cautiously walking around in the creek and Kyle started singing Señor Don Gato!  I love that song!  I taught it to Kyle when he was just able to speak.  What brought that on?  I have no idea, but it was the perfect song for singing, while splashing around in a creek, in the middle of the woods.

Saturday night they had movie night!  They played Brave at their outside amphitheater.  It was really cool watching a movie in the middle of the woods outside in the nice cool air, while sitting under a blanket.  I loved it!  Almost like the drive in, only better!  While we were there we met a lady who was originally from Latrobe.  Incidentally, she was good friends of my parent’s neighbor, who were also friends of the family, the Ferry’s.  What a small a world!

Check out the Piper bonfire! We never do anything small, not even hanging around a campfire at Parker Dam. 6/16/13

Funny story:  Sorry I can’t remember her name, but she is a manager of the park.  She also previously came across my blog, finding it on her Google alerts for Parker Dam.  She read my last few blog posts about our camping experiences at the park.  Smart lady, doing her homework and hearing first hand what others are saying.  I can only say good things about Parker Dam.  The facilities and amenities are very clean and really nice and the park rangers are very pleasant and respectful.  I’m not the only one who thinks so.  I have a friend who goes there twice a year, they’ve been doing since she was a little girl.  Well done!  Two thumbs up for Parker Dam!

Sunday morning rained.  Did we care?  Nope not at all!  We were in our very own dry safe haven.  It was just like being at home.  Nicole, Kyle and I played card games, Three of a Kind was the game of choice, although sometimes we broke out a mean game of war.  I brought the chess set, however it never made its appearance.  Kyle and I both read, I was working on Lord of the Rings The Fellowship of the Ring and his journey took place in Lord of the Rings The Two Towers.  Mom, dad, the dogs and Storm?  They laid around and nodded off and on.

With all this “stuff”, guess what also managed to make its appearance?  Yes you guessed it the Legos!  On Saturday night I sat with Kyle on our big rock by the camp fire and helped him set up the battle and played a little.  Funny story!  Kyle thought me and his Aunt Nikki were taking my car to camp so right before he departed on Thursday night with mom and dad, he loaded my car up Legos.  I mean loaded!  They covered the backseat, the passenger seat and the floor of all three places.  When I opened the door I thought I was at war.  Kyle said, “Ya that’s so when you get there, I would have already set up my battle and you can bring the reinforcements.”  Naturally, that’s exactly what I was thinking for our camping trip, to drag around a ton of Legos.  Only a few made the trip.

Now looking back on the weekend, and realizing what I am remembering are now memories, memories of fun, memories of togetherness, memories at our home away from home, I realize all the packing and hulling stuff, setting it up and tearing it down, ‘YES it was totally worth it!’  Can’t wait to do it again!

Read other adventures at Parker Dame

Fishing Towards Independence
Just Had to Take It to Parker Dam
Parker Dam State Park Story
Lego Love

How many legs does a dog have it you call the tail a leg?  Four.  Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg.  ~Abraham Lincoln

Kyle hanging out in the Air & Space Museum in Washington, D.C. 6/27/09

Yesterday was a great day!  Kyle played my assistant while we went to Shadyside.

Being located just outside Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania Shadyside is such a quaint, close-knit community that forces you to get out and walk around and explore.  My kind of joint!  We were down there to pass out flyers, meet with business owners and supply posters for the Thrill of the Hunt Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt. Obviously, the scavenger hunt is taking place in Shadyside, at the end of the month on Saturday June 29th.  If you are a dog owner, you won’t want to miss this event!

Traveling about an hour to get to our destination, allows for some serious dashboard time.  I couldn’t help myself, I told Kyle I got him his birthday gift.  I also mentioned that I will have to fork it over early.  He politely smiled and shrugged his shoulders.  I said, “Don’t you want to know what it is?”  He shrugged again and said, “Umm ya I guess but I know you’ll never tell me” without an ounce of enthusiasm.  I’m not surprised, he knows very well that I won’t by him toys or video games.  My gifts to Kyle have always been unconventional.  Meaning they are either educational yet fun, or a skill or an opportunity to try something new, which he may have never done so.  I’m all about the experiences in life.  Examples, piano lessons, guitar lessons, flying a plane, swimming lessons, the Harry Potter book set, Chess set, Monopoly game, tickets to see Lion King the musical with the family and so on and so forth.  Even though he loves the gifts, he is still a bit shortsighted by his love of Legos, video games and toys.  At least at this point of his life.

Yes, that’s Kyle in the Air & Space Museum in Washington D.C., holding a Lego set! He hasn’t changed yet. 6/27/09

Well, little does Kyle know, I purchased him a Bricks 4 Kidz camp for a week.  The morning session is Animal Grossology and the afternoon session is Space and Astronomy -Star Wars.  As we drove, I though I’d get him a little bit psyched up by offering clues.  He wasn’t about the guessing game, so I made him.  I said, “Ok, I’ll give you two clues, number one, it involves animals and number two it involves space.”  Now Kyle’s imagination and complete silliness took over.

He was saying, “You got me a dog in space.  You got me a cat in space.  You got me a dog shaped comet.  You got me a dog and a telescope.  You got me a telescope to look at dogs in space.”  Then the ultimate comment.  “You got me a dog shaped telescope!”  We both busted out laughing, for what came next took our breath away.  I said, “How does that work, you lift up its tail and look through its bum hole?”  We were dying!   And then, maintaining consistency with our wild imaginations, we took it to the next outrageous level.   I said, “Ya and to zoom in our out, you push the paw and when you’re done, you put the tail back down.”  Kyle was laughing so hard, no noise exited his mouth.

After a while we started talking about the sounds the dog shaped telescope would make, and it went on from there.  Good times!

It was one of those gut stretching moments that seems like only Kyle and I really appreciate.  We do have such a great time together and he has such a great personality and imagination!  Even if it is just riding in a car.

On a side note, Kyle was such a great kid the entire day.  Even as I met with business owners, he was polite, shook their hands and really sincerely helped me!  He even had a great idea of stopping those people who were walking their dogs to give them a flyer.  Great idea buddy!  Go straight to our target market.

Kyle never once complained about walking, however he did take advantage of the opportunity to window shop while moving through the streets.  I can’t blame him, I did the same!  We did swing by the Apple Store, of course why not we were right there, to take a peek at what’s new and exciting.

On a side note, Kyle mentioned he lost his ipod.  What?  Are you kidding me?  He said, “Umm well I know it’s somewhere in my room.  I just haven’t found it yet.”  O Kyle!

Another great day with the little man, totally unplanned and very productive on my end.  Kyle is excited about the Dog Gone!  Scavenger Hunt, as am I!  It’ll be a fun event.  More on that later.  So don’t miss the fun and go to the Thrill of the Hunt website (ThrillScavengerHunt.com) and purchase your Dog Gone! Scavenger Hunt tickets!

Catch all the ridiculously funny stories!

Laughing About Nothing
Laughing About Nothing … True Story
Laughing About Nothing … Cats!
Laughing About Nothing … Truck Horn!

If you got to work on your goals, your goals will go to work on you.  If you to to work on your plan, your plan will go to work on you.  Whatever good things we build end up building us.  ~Jim Rohn

Kyle built his new Legos. His favorite activity even at Parker Dam. 5/18/13

Kyle, even at eleven years old, ready to go into the seventh grade, still has a love for Legos.  Mentioning it a time or two, or three or four (Another Lego Christmas, Kyle’s Lego Dream @LegoKidsFest 2012, Shopping Spree, Kyle Asks for Prayers, Happy Lego Birthday Kyle – 11 Years Old!, Seattle – Twilight Pilgrimage Part 4 and the list goes on and on), Kyle’s love of Legos is even stronger now than it ever has been.  This past Easter was no exception, as well as our last camping expedition.  In fact, just about everywhere we go and everything we do includes this building block activity.

Let’s start with Easter.  Unfortunately, I missed this past Easter.  I was seriously sick and just laid there like a slug.  Actually, I felt bad for two big reasons.  One, because I wanted to enjoy the holiday with my family and two, because I promised Kyle I would wake up with him at the crack of dawn, like I have done every year, to watch him find the Easter eggs.  Yes, he instructed us to hide the eggs, even though he is well aware the Easter bunny is not real.  The kid didn’t want to miss out on anything and that included looking for the pastel colored plastic eggs, usually filled with change.  Kyle is anything if consistent.

Side story!  Kyle’s youth group held an Easter egg hunt.  While they were setting it up, Kyle had to serve mass and missed being apart of the assembly of the event.  They let him participate since he didn’t know where the eggs were hidden.  Naturally, Kyle found the golden egg, which allowed him to take this chocolate bunny wrapped in gold foil embellished with a dangling collar ornament.  Mom, who picked our little man up after he was done said, “You should have seen Kyle.  He was so excited about participating he forgot he was upset.  He showed me his chocolate bunny.  He even pointed to the collar and said ‘OOo Gigi, look!’.  I tell ya what, that kid!  He always manages to come out on top.”  And he certainly does.

You’d think this smile was from the excitement of heading to Parker Dam for the weekend. I’m not entirely certain. 5/17/13

Kyle and the rest of the family enjoyed Easter, while I laid on my death bed.  I’d like to call out an observation I made.  Easter used to be a celebration of Jesus and it is, but it has certainly taken on another form, an almost Christmas gift giving quality.  To counter act this new trend, I make sure I take Kyle to the Stations of the Cross during lent.  I even reviewed the Stations of the Cross with him independently, in addition to CCD class and going to church.  Kyle knows the true meaning of Easter and Christmas, however he also has this affinity for those Legos.

Easter, arriving on Sunday, March 31st of this year was the same.  Kyle was at no shortage of Legos to put together and play with.  Did I break down and fall into the Lego frenzy?  Nope, I purchased Kyle a few books on how to play chess and an Unofficial Harry Potter Cookbook.  I must say, even though he loves his Legos, that goes without question, he did like the books.  Since then we’ve made a few recipes out of the cookbook and we’ve perused the chess books while playing a few mean games, picking up new tips.  Even though he appreciates his supply of Legos, I think the chess books took him off guard and was a pleasant surprise.  He loves to play chess and he’s pretty good at it.  He even wants to join the chess club at school, if they have one.  Knowing that, I wanted to encourage him.

Did he use the chess books as much as he played with the Legos, nope but that’s fine.  At least he plays with his Legos and still uses his imagination and enjoys himself.

I’m just going to discuss his Lego love from this past spring.  Nicole and Kyle have this on going deal.  When he gets A’s on his report card, she slips the kid some cash to spend on whatever he chooses.  Can you guess what he had his eye on this report card?  Yep, more Legos!  Seriously, I thought he owned them all!  I guess not.

The ordering process is down to a science.  Kyle picks out the Legos he wants, emails the Lego name and sku number to my sister and Nicole usually orders the goods to be delivered to the house.  That way he can track the packages and there is no hold up waiting for my sister to come home to drop off the Legos.

However, this one particular time there was a flaw in the system and the Legos never showed up.  Even though the online receipt was claiming it was delivered.  Kyle was stressed!  Who had his Lego?  Is he ever going to get another one?  And so on and so forth.   That sparked emails back and forth between me, mom and Nicole.  It was really funny, even though I know Kyle was sincerely stressed over the situation.  Eventually, Nicole had me go to the store to pick up the Lego to cool his horses.  I did, reluctantly.  I don’t think we should jump every time Kyle says how high, although he wasn’t pushy with us, just distressed.  Also, he did do a great job on his report card and earned that money fair and square.

Would you believe months later, the neighbor realized they had the package all along and returned it to Kyle?  I’m not sure how someone doesn’t recognize a package delivered that has LEGO, written clearly across the top in bright letters.  I mean didn’t the sound of a million tiny little brick pieces give it away?  Not to mention, Kyle personally called and stopped over to see if Kyle’s mail found its way to the wrong house.  Whatever.

After the missing package resurfaced, I guess Kyle called my sister and asked what he should do with the Lego, since she already paid for this one and he got the same set, when I picked it up.  Another side note.  That was a nice gesture, Kyle could have just assumed he was getting that Lego or not mentioned it at all.  Yet, instead he called my sister right away to keep her in the loop.  Nicole told him to keep the Lego and have two.  A comment that sent pure happiness through Kyle.  A random surprise for the day.  For once no argument came from our little Lego lover.

Now let’s discuss this past report card, for the third quarter.  Yes, my little man got all A’s and a B in writing.  I’m perfectly fine with that!  He worked hard and did a great job!  His reward?  Ask his Aunt Nikki, who seems to be his Lego supplier.  He was rewarded with more Legos to build and play with, at his request.  His theme of choice for this batch?  Lego Star Wars.

On May 17 – 19, just a few weeks ago, we went to Parker Dam for camping and fishing.  (Fishing Towards Independence,  Just Had to Take It to Parker Dam, Parker Dam State Park Story)  Mom and dad left earlier on that Friday before us.  I had to wait to get Kyle off of the bus before making our journey.  While we were packing and making our preparations, the Legos Nicole ordered came in.  All along prior to this time, Kyle would call Nicole and mom to check and see if the precious packages arrived.  Can you believe him?  Yep, it’s true!

Mom instructed me to put the new, highly anticipated Legos in my car.  What?  Are you kidding me?  We were going camping and fishing, not hanging out putting together Legos!  Reluctantly, I did as instructed and added the Legos to the contents of my car.  As Kyle got off the bus, he peeked inside the windows to see the huge boxes, a total of three were present.   The smile that erupted from his face was contagious and truly delightful!

Kyle hid away in the camper to put together his Legos. Kyle brings camping to a whole new meaning. 5/18/13

As soon as we got on our way, Kyle did his usual inspecting of the packaging and reading the number of pieces in each box, the characters supplied in each Lego set and so on and so forth.  I think he does that on purpose to build his excitement even more.  He couldn’t wait to bust open the boxes and go to town.

Close-up of Kyle assembling his Legos. A new way of camping at Parker Dam 5/18/13

Once we got to Parker Dam on Friday night, after Storm took off for the woods to play Jeremiah Johnson, Kyle opened a box of Legos and began to assemble.  He didn’t want to head down to meet up with his pap to fish, he didn’t want to help me look for my missing cat, he didn’t even want to get out his bike and go for a ride.  He wanted to build!  It’s like an addiction for him.  At least it’s a healthy learning one!

Literally, I had to pace him with the Legos and force him to think about other things while camping.  Once Kyle is involved or introduced to something else, he has a great time.  It’s just getting him to that point that can be tricky.  Throughout the weekend, we did manage to get our bikes rolling and explore the campsite a bit, as well as an unmarked dirt road.  On Sunday, we took the dogs for a walk in the nearby woods.  Even though we weren’t suppose to separate them from their leashes, we did so the boys could stretch out their legs.  After all, they were used to running free in the woods while we hiked.

But I bet the highlight to Kyle’s weekend, besides trudging through the creek and splashing with the dogs and getting all wet, was building and playing with those Legos.  Ok, maybe out fishing me made the top of his list too.

Saturday, after fishing in the morning, became the Lego building time.  Our camp fire was positioned by a large rock.  Kyle used that to play on.  It was his base of his Lego war.  As we hung around the campfire shooting the breeze, Kyle played with his Lego characters and their flying transportation devices.  He really enjoyed himself!

I guess any situation is a perfect situation with Legos, and any situation can be made a Lego good time.  Even if it was an enjoyable one without the primary colored building blocks.  I’m looking to sign Kyle up for Bricks for Kidz camp.  I bet he would enjoy that!

There’s things that happen in a person’s life that are so scorched in the memory and burned into the heart that there’s no forgetting them.  ~John Boyne

Yep, that’s Kyle among a sea of kids, dancing around at his school’s Folk Festival. He was hiding from me after I busted a move to YMCA. Sometimes you just have to get it out. 6/3/13

It’s true, sometimes there are events and situations that occur, which can never be forgotten.  For those pessimists out there, I don’t believe these episodes are all bad and I believe any situation we encounter in life shapes us one way or another.  Heck, sometimes they are even really funny and will be brought up around the dinner table or campfire from time to time, just for a good laugh.  This is one of those stories, witnessed by many, remembered by me.

Yesterday was Kyle’s folk festival.  His very last assemble of elementary school!  Yes it was a bittersweet event.  In fact, Kyle, knowing I would want to see him and knowing that I would come, called me to remind me of the shindig.  He called me while I was meeting on the . The Chad Delier Scanlon Story.  While I was confirming the date and time with my little man, this crazy thought popped in my head. The Heel Toe dance!

The Heel Toe dance is a dance, done every year during their Folk Festival after the students perform their required practiced square dance or line dance.  When they announce the Heel Toe dance, the students go running into the audience to select a parent, sometimes a teacher or a friend to partner-up with.  It always looked like so much fun!  As the memories of this dance come rushing into my head, the excitement was already building.  I mentioned the dance to Kyle, to plant the seed, as I do every year.  He just ignored me.  When I asked him again if I could dance with him, he just sort of laughed and then moved off of the subject before getting off the phone.

Kyle with his other friend Logan. Logan danced beside me at the schools Folk Festival, while Kyle ran… Surely he wasn’t embarrassed? 6/3/13

On a side note, I new nothing about the Folk Festival until Kyle called to remind me.  Thanks buddy!  It’s a good thing I’m working for Thrill of the Hunt, a division of The Piper Corporation or I wouldn’t be able to take off work, on such short notice.  Although I’m glad he included me!

Mom and I made our appearance, armed and ready to take video and pictures and to clap and cheer him on.  It was a nice cloudy day and the Folk Festival was held out in the school yard.  All the parents and onlookers circled the kids in the lawn chairs.

Slowly, the show moved along until we got to the long anticipated for, sixth graders!  At this point it was nice to see the kids do their square dance and to pull their loved ones out of the audience to dance the Heel Toe Dance, but my patience and interest was fading with every grade.  That is until Kyle and his class took center stage among the trampled down blades of grass.

Instead of a typical square dance, they did a line dance, which didn’t seem to amuse Kyle, at all!  He was barely moving through the motions and seemed annoyed at the assembly.  Keep in mind this was a child who called me a few days prior, excited to tell me about the festival and wanting me to be there.  Kids!

Then came the big moment I was waiting for, the Heel Toe Dance!  Yes!  After coming to all his assemblies and watching years worth of Folk Festivals, I wanted to be the one picked to dance the Heel Toe dance with Kyle!  I will confess, I sort of practiced it prior to, only from watching others perform it and paying attention.  I’m ready!

Naturally, as the kids move around gathering up their partners, it was pretty noisy.  I stood on the sidelines waving my hands yelling to get Kyle’s attention to show him where I was standing.  (Just in case he didn’t see me.)  Then mom chimed in and said, “Go up to him so he can see where you are.”  At that point, we both thought Kyle would dance with me, and let’s face it, I was excited!  So like an idiot, I went running across the lawn, in front of parents, teachers and the entire school of kids, with my arms flailing around as I was yelling “Kyle! Kyle!”

Just as I reached Kyle, in-the-nick-of-time before he chose someone, I wrapped my arms around him, startling the little package.  Granted, I know better, hugging him in front of the entire school was not accepted, but I couldn’t help myself.  Beside shooting me a big surprised look, he did give me one of his ornery grins.  Admittingly, I was sporting a huge smile on my overly energetic body.  I said, “Kyle are you going to let me dance with you?”  Like an idiot, I had it all planned out in my head, mom was on standby to take the video, and my dreams have finally come true.

Until he looked me square in the eye and said as a matter of factually, “No.” then he elbowed me to get away from him!  What?  Denied!  Are you kidding?  I was instantly removed from my fluffy dream of running through the green fields toward Kyle, only to end up spiraling down a black pit!  Did I take the wrong road?  Pick the wrong kid?

Nope, it was all true and was witnessed by some.  One being Kyle’s friend Luke’s mom, Sue.  Kyle picked his friend Logan, right in front of me!  Not knowing what to do next, I walked away with my head held low, in utter shock.  As I got to my mom all I could say was, “He told me no!”  Just then Sue busted out laughing.  Not that I can blame her.  I mean I looked pretty ridiculous running out there among the kids yelling, to only get turned down.

After the shock wore off, I found the humor in the entire situation, that I incidentally created for myself.  After all, Kyle never agreed to dance with me and there wasn’t anything in the rule books on the subject.  So, excepting the situation for what it was, I join Sue in the laughter.  By then, she was really busting a gut.  Of course, so was I when I did a play-by-play account of the last few minutes of my life, adding in the part when he elbowed me.  We were both dying!

This was a good story for the books!  No matter, if he wasn’t going to dance with me, I was going to make him.  Just to pay him back, as the entire class danced in the grass to YMCA, I got up and ran behind Kyle to bust a move.  He had no idea I was there until his friend pointed to me and Kyle turned around, with a mix of humor and horror on his face.  He did get a little red in the cheeks, but he couldn’t help laughing at me dancing and throwing my arms in the YMCA letters.

Putting this silliness aside, I am very proud of Kyle.  He just receive a letter from the school stating that after an evaluation of his work and test scores, he was going to move into advanced math next year.  Yep, so he will be a seventh grader taking ninth grade math!  I guess those flashcards I got him and worked with him when he was two, paid off.  Although that may have been a start, he always had the interest and intelligence to do math.  He worked hard for that accomplishment and it is all his.  Way to go buddy!  God Speed to you in junior high!

Maybe one day, the Heel Toe Dance will be mine!

It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.  ~Mother Teresa

This post is dedicated to my cousin Chad Scanlon.  In loving memory of Chad, September 4, 1994 – May 25, 2007.

Chad Delier Scanlon, what a great inspiration!

This is a follow up to the Life’s Not Fair blog post.  After I wrote it, a certain someone came to mind, my cousin Chad.  He passed away on Memorial Day from a brain tumor, on May 25, 2007.  He was just 12 years old, about Kyle’s age.

Is that fair he didn’t have a chance to live his life?  Is it fair the family had to accept such an ordeal with the fight of cancer or worse, to loose a child?  Nope, but again it’s part of God’s ultimate plan I guess, even if we don’t understand it or really accept it.  So I guess life isn’t so bad when you spill your coffee or hit every red-light.

In all sincerity, I believe Chad lived a full life while he was with us.  How can you not growing up on the ridge?  The Scanlon family is a living testament to the type of person Chad would have turned out to be.  Jimmy, Marie-Paule and Sasha, Chad’s dad, mom and sister respectively, are all down to earth, good hearted folk.

The Scanlon’s and the Delier’s have always held their head high and never pitied themselves, nor did they expect that from anyone.  Nope!  They played the hand that was dealt to them and tried to handle it as best they could, even when Chad was fighting for his life and when he passed on.  Do they miss Chad?  Sure, everyday!  Everyday Chad is thought about, everyday they feel the grief.  Just like anyone who has lost a loved one, especially so young.  But they took this as an opportunity to help others while working through their pain.  They are the strongest of people, those that can move forward, face their grief and use it to help others, to reach out to those who need strength and support.

Chad & Sasha in their pj’s. 12/31/05

As a lasting tribute to Chad, they established the Chad Delier Scanlon Memorial Fund at the Community Foundation of Westmoreland County.  Every year the Scanlon family, and I mean the entire family, organizes the Chad Delier Scanlon Golf Outing at the Glengarry Golf Course in Latrobe, Pa.

Besides helping the healing process, which I can totally understand and relate to (ie the Aunt Heather blog), they support many of Chad’s activities.  Can you believe Chad was fluent in French, ever since he was able to talk?  Yes!  His mother, Marie-Paule is bilingual, being born and raised in Belgium.  I always thought that was so cool!  Maybe because je parle un peu de Francais.

Me, Jimmy & Marie-Paule Scanlon, Casey Olczak & Sasha Scanlon. The dream team! Chad Delier Scanlon Golf Outing at Glengarry Golf Course Latrobe. 2010

Chad went to the Holy Trinity Catholic School and he was a member of the church.  He enjoyed hunting and fishing.  What can I say?  All kids born into our family come pre-programmed for the outdoors.  Of course, I couldn’t speak of Chad without mentioning his love of jump rope.  Yes!  He was a member of the High Flyers Jump Rope Team.  In fact, while Chad was going through rehabilitation, he would work some jump rope into his activity.  Can I also mention he had a great attitude and never complained?  Never heard ‘It’s not fair.’

In addition to Chad’s activities, the Scanlon’s, raise money to help families whose own children are undergoing medical crises.  When I say the Scanlon’s, I’m referring to the immediate family and the rest of the family clan along with friends and neighbors.  Like I said, the Scanlon’s are genuinely good caring people.

It’s no secret, there are many more stories like Chad’s, but I’ve never heard anyone say ‘It’s not fair’.

Chad’s High Flyers Jump Rope Team. Sasha is in the back row on the far left & Chad is in the middle back row.

Instead of saying ‘It’s not fair’, do what you can to help.  Years ago, when I read The Book of Chad, I was pleasantly surprised to find out what the local friends and family did to help Chad and his family during Chad’s struggle.  This is amazing to me!  Family and friends got together to finish building Jimmy’s garage.  Yes, while the family was dealing with Chad’s sickness, friend and family finished building a complete structure!  The Scanlon’s came home to find a finished garage at the end of the driveway.  I bet that was an awesome sight!  Maybe it helped to shift their focus, even if it was for just a moment.  I’m sure it made Santa’s little helpers feel good to just pitch-in and do something, and I know Jimmy and Marie-Paule appreciated it beyond words.  Sometimes giving is completely unrelated, yet it means the world to both parties.

Kyle & Casey at the Chad Delier Scanlon Golf Outing at Glengarry Golf Course, Latrobe. Chad & Kyle share the same godfather!  2010

It’s easier said than done, and not everyone thinks that way or has the drive, motivation, resources or ideas to tackle their tragedy in the same manner, but there is much more to bringing comfort to others.  Instead of saying, ‘It’s not fair’ we should be saying ‘What can I do to help my fellow brother or sister?’

A few years after Ryan passed away, dad was back in the hospital.  Something about his oxygen in his blood being low, or something along those lines.   Naturally, I got a call from mom telling me to meet her in the emergency room.  On a side note, I walked in the room where mom and dad were, and dad was wearing a hospital gown for a shirt and he kept his jeans and boots on!  I almost fell over laughing at the sight!  Mom said he refused to get totally undressed, since they only needed his arms to take his blood pressure and such.  Only my dad!

Anyway, across the room from dad was a little boy, probably Kyle’s age at the time, two or three.  I’m not sure why he was there, but I do know he was sick, again the details were none of my business.  When dad heard about the little tyke, he immediately had my mom go and get the little boy a balloon and a stuffed animal from the hospital gift shop.  I know seeing that kid sick struck a cord with dad.  At that point, Kyle was always in and out of the hospital himself with phenomena, tonsillitis, ear infections, you name it, all respiratory issues.  We had a sick little man on our hands for quite some time.  I did peek my head in the room of the mystery boy, just to give the kid a thumbs up.  He was so happy over his spontaneous gift from an unknown source.  It made all of us smile.  And you know what?  The day was a little bit easier to take.

Chad helping his dad with building the beginning of the garage before he got sick.

Was it fair that Kyle was so sick for so many years or that little boy was in the ER?  No, but we are blessed that Kyle is healthy now.  Like I said, others always have it worse, like Chad’s struggle.  But I will admit those years of emergency room visits, made us all aware of the fears and battles other sick children tackle.  Let’s not forget, it helped Kyle to soften dad’s heart.  So much so, that he reach out his neighbor, literally, across the hallway to give back.  This time in the form of a milliard balloon and a stuffed animal.

You know I do believe Ryan and Chad are hanging out in heaven together, maybe casting their fishing lines side-by-side.  I also believe they are with my pap and Chad’s grandma, my Aunt Helen.  That’s how we are related, my pap and Aunt Helen’s dad were brothers, Jimmy’s grandpa and my grandpa were brothers.  Aunt Helen was another one of those great spirits we were all blessed to know.  Ryan had such a crush on Aunt Helen when he was little.  He used to say she was his girlfriend.  Maybe she’s sitting there too, fishing in the pool of heaven.

Me & Kyle working tickets at the Chad Delier Scanlon Golf Outing 2010

This year’s golf outing is on Saturday, June 15th at the Glengarry Golf Course in Latrobe, Pa., near Lycippus.  Every year the seats fill up fast, I guess that’s what happens when you come from such a large family.  It is a fun event!  All donations support the Make-A-Wish Foundation to help a child with a life threatening disease receive a wish; the Holy Trinity School in Ligonier; Hunt-of-A-Lifetime to help send a child with a terminal illness on a hunting trip; and Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh Foundation for travel expenses to aid children in getting to Children’s Hospital in Pittsburgh for treatment.

Sasha & Chad setting up the train for Christmas

If anyone is interested in volunteering or donating, please let me know.  Or visit the on Facebook.  Show your support for Chad and the family just by hitting ‘Like’.  Some donate in the form of monetary contributions; some sponsor a hole, which we do in memory of Ryan; while others donate their time and some donate baskets and prizes to be raffled off during the golf outing.  It’s a very well organized event that I am blessed to be apart of every year.

I do want to give a special shout out to the Glengarry Golf Course.  They have been exceptional to work with and they have treated us wonderfully.  Besides going out of their way to make sure the day runs smooth, not that Jimmy and Marie-Paule need any assistance, but they are easy to work with and they genuinely want the day to be successful.

To really learn the full story of Chad’s brain tumor, the struggles and obstacles he and his family faced, purchase The Book of Chad.  It couldn’t be more straightforward and spot on and educational.

I can do things you cannot, you can do things I cannot; together we can do great things.  ~Mother Teresa

Life’s Not Fair… sometimes you get a bloody lip from your walking stick. Kyle & Nick were acting like Jedi Masters…my little Yoda 2013

“That’s not fair!” has been exclaimed from Kyle’s mouth time and time again.  In fact, I heard it proclaimed this past weekend at the fishing derby Gone Fishing!.  “Why is everyone else getting fish?  That’s not fair!  Why am I the only one?”  and on and on.  It’s fishing, no one ever in the history of the world said that every fisherman was suppose to catch the same amount of fish, let alone at the same time, all being the same size.  It’s called life!

I know, I’m guilty of muttering those words too, for various reasons, mostly from my youth.  Being an adult, I really don’t care to keep tallies and to track fairness.  I realized long ago, everyone has their cross to bear and what may seem unfair, is ultimately in the hands of the Almighty One.

Is life suppose to be fair?  It was never promised, by anyone at any time, not even in the bible.  Yes, it’s true it talks about being fair and just to others but that is instructed of us, the ones with free will who sometimes stray from what’s right.  Even with dictatorship rulings and socialist countries, everything is seriously not fair.  There are always going to be those born into wealth or have status and opportunities that others don’t.  Some are more intelligent and have great ideas etc.

Dodge Ball, sometimes you win… sometimes you loose… sometimes you get smacked in the face. Kyle did twice! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Two Friday’s ago Kyle lost his molar.  Yep, poor kid will be going into the seventh grade and is still loosing baby teeth.  Maturity is not a strong trait in the Piper family.  Anyway, we went to see Iron Man 3, which was great!  He always has to get popcorn, except this missing tooth threw a monkey wrench in his behavior.  He said, “O man, now I can’t have popcorn with the movie!  Not with my sore gum.  That’s not fair.”  My parents said, “Just eat to one side.”  He wouldn’t hear of it.  That’s not the way you are suppose to eat, and he would not do it.

On a side note, Kyle is a bit of a weakling, putting it mildly, when it comes to any sort of physical pain.  No matter how minor.

As we drove to the movie theater, he commented again on how that wasn’t fair.  Really?  With all the poverty, starvation and lack of proper nutrition in the world and him not eating popcorn for a movie on opening night is not fair?  Someone needs to reevaluate his position.  Better yet, let good old Aunt Heather put it in perspective.  Keep in mind, this whole conversation was based on the fact he couldn’t eat popcorn!  He could very well eat the snack, he just needed to adjust his chewing.  That too ticked me off.  Before the whining could begin, and before I seriously lost my temper, I go into one of my rants of how children are starving and don’t have the opportunity to go to the movies, especially on opening night.  Kyle quickly dropped it, only because he didn’t want to listen to my ‘Everyone has it worse’ dissertation.  I stopped because I didn’t want to hear his ‘Poor me’ arguments.

Kyle at the Friday night showing of Iron Man 3, we are big fans! 5/3/13

That got me thinking, life just isn’t fair.  And I’m grateful for that!  God made each and everyone of us unique in our way.  Every person has strengths and weaknesses, which means there will never be complete “fairness”.  He made us that way on purpose so we rely on each other to exist, to socialize, to be his children, his family.

Let’s discuss physical traits that can and cannot be helped.  Some people are short, some are tall, fat, skinny, fair skinned, dark skinned, and the list goes on and on.  Some may say, that’s not fair she has prettier eyes or a better smile than I have.  Those, ‘That’s not fair’ comments is what makes us all unique and different.  It brings variety to life.

Since the physical traits are all different, doesn’t the same principal go for all other aspects of life?  Example time.   Does everyone need to have the same amount of money as their neighbor?  I don’t think so.  I love the fact that I always worked, and worked hard for what I have, never accepting hand outs.  Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve received assistance in one form or another, but isn’t that what life’s about?  Helping our neighbor when they’ve earned it or in time of need?  I also don’t believe a ‘time of need’ is every minute of every day.  Sometimes you have to stand on your own two feet and pave your own path.  After all, how can you feel a sense of accomplishment, a sense of purpose, a sense of giving, when you are always taking?

Since everyone is different, and to the best of my knowledge that is a very true statement, wouldn’t each person treat all situations differently?  Maybe some people need to be driven or they can never accomplish anything or learn.  You always respect and appreciate the rags to riches story.  The person who came from nothing and made a better life for themselves.  Maybe that person needed to be put in a poor scenario to establish drive and motivation.  If that was taken away because of even distribution of wealth, then how would that life have ended?  Also wouldn’t the starting out in humble beginnings allows one to appreciate the flip side of life?  It may or may not instill a humility, but the option is now there,  as well as all the other lessons of life.

Sometimes you get the toy you want… sometimes you give your turn up to another kid with only 1 prize. Way to go Kyle! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

That’s what drives and motivates me, knowing I can reach a goal and be rewarded for it.  When I see a challenge I want to tackle it, taking it on ten fold.  If I have a goal to reach, I will work myself silly trying to reach it.  However, if I was just handed “things” and never felt the sense of pride or contribution, then I would not respect the handout as much, if at all.  I would never want to strive for what I think is better.  Worse, if what I worked for was taken from me, not by my choice, and given to someone else.  How would my actions change?

Sometimes lessons of life do not create a fairytale ending.  Sometimes they are just horrible and tragic.  But doesn’t that give us the opportunity to turn such darkness into light?  It’s not fair my brother died so young and sudden, for no apparent reason except God said it was his time.  It’s not fair that my nephew will never know his dad or grow up without a father.  Our family has made the most out of the cards we were dealt.  We never walk around saying, “It’s not fair.”  Never!  Instead, we’ve all stepped up our game, as with other friends and family.  I’ve been blessed to witness and be apart of such acts of kindness and sincerity over the years from others.  Sometimes it was just a pat on the back or words of encouragement and sometimes it came in the form of action and activity.  Even a simple invite or inclusion into an activity makes a world of difference.  I’m blessed in my life, and no it’s not fair but I’m fine with that.

I made Kyle pose in the Monster’s Inc. display before we saw Iron Man 3. I was cracking up! 5/3/13

This is a bit silly and simplistic, but I think it’s just the story to put my thoughts into plain English, common sense.  My cat, Storm believes she is one of the dogs, our Labradors.  She want’s to do everything they do, including taking hikes through the woods.  Alas, this would not be safe for her if she ever wondered off while we were hiking, or worse, adventured off on her own at night.  She meows at the door and angrily flips her tail to show her disdain for the situation.  It’s just not fair.  Nope, it’s not but it’s the way it is.  Storm is allowed to do things the dogs can’t, like being on the furniture and she gets to take more car rides than the dogs and so on and so forth.  The dogs get to take hikes but get more attention than the cat.  I understand I am making a rather feeble attempt at an Aesop’s Fable (I have no idea if there is one similar to this story) but certainly worth the calories burnt to ponder the simple thought.

Instead of focusing on “Life’s not fair”, shouldn’t we be exclaiming the obvious question?  ‘What can I do to help my fellow brother or sister?’

My CCD teacher told us this story and I always come back to it.  Forgive me for butchering it, but the lesson is the same.  He was in a very poverty stricken area, I can’t remember where, maybe South America doing missionary work.  He told us of this small child who was bouncing a ball.  Just playing with this rubber ball up a dirt road, which overlooked a very steep bank filled with garbage, sewage and rats.  As the child was self entertained, the ball happened to hit a rock sideways and was projected out of control.  Yep, you guessed it, the fun bouncing ball made a direct course of action for the filth down in the ravine.  Lost forever!  Did the child whine or cry?  Nope!  The young person, wearing only rags, continued on their route toward their straw hut with a dirt floor.  That was the only toy the child had, and now there was no more.

Sometimes you win the race & sometimes you take it slow and enjoy the sights & conversations! Me & Holly at the Great Race 2012

My teacher was actually on the way to visit the family, helping with the child’s sick sibling.  That’s how he knew the living conditions.  What my teacher witnessed made an impact on me.  I can’t even imagine the thoughts that would have erupted, if I witnessed this story first hand.  Is it fair that some live in extreme poverty?  Nope but that’s why we are called to reach out with what resources we have, to make a difference.

Mother Teresa is a perfect example of that.  She wanted to make a difference.  She never said, “It’s not fair” that no one is helping me with the sick, or no one is giving me money.  Nope, she took the resources she had and made a difference.  Is it fair that she had such a strong relationship with God and I’m not that tight with him?  If I want that, then I need to work for it.  God gave us plenty of opportunities to establish and build that relationship.  Each one of us have a different purpose in life and are called for specific reasons.

So really, maybe ‘Life isn’t fair’ should be tied directly to respect?  If we truly respect one another and respected all the things we have, then we wouldn’t be saying ‘Life isn’t fair’.  We would be more willing to lend a helping hand or give generously.

If a friend bought me something, more often then not I would take extra special care of it.  However, if I was given the same gift without a face or a reason behind the charity, then it would loose some of its value and not be treated with equal importance.  Charity and giving is all about the intent.  Not the notoriety and certainly not for selfish reasons.

It’s our job to help our brothers and sisters far and wide.  To help, from one person to another.  That’s what really makes the impact.  Not being forced to give my money in the form of taxes or some other undercover way, even if it is to assist those in need.  Yes, helping others is the end game, but the road traveled to get there is equally as important.  Giving, should be benefiting both parties involved, those that gave and those that received.  Naturally, the rewards are very different, yet equally as important.

So I guess, when I see that something “is not fair”, that really means, there’s an opportunity there to make a difference.

Each time you step off your path and give someone an act of kindness…then your road to happiness just to a little smoother.  ~Donna A. Favors

Marty, Jenny & Jimmy Singer beating the rain at the Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

This past weekend, yes Mother’s Day weekend, was the 24th Annual Louise Planinsek Fishing Derby.  This much anticipated event, is talked about and prepared for all year long.  It’s one of those activities that is automatically added to the calendar and you plan around, taking priority over everything else.

On a side note, happy late Mother’s Day to all those mother’s, guardians, role models, and anyone who has nurtured, raised and helped make a difference in the life of a child.

Kyle trying to crack a smile at the Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Friday night, me, mom and Kyle headed up to the Fishing Derby with our covered dishes.  I made brownies and Kyle requested my pasta salad.  We sat around the bonfire eating, drinking and chit chatting with everyone.  Some individuals I see every week in church, and some I see once a year.  Regardless, it’s always a good time with a great group of friends and family.

At this time, we usually pitch the tent, set up our camping gear and get out our fishing stuff.  However, this year I did not brave the rain and thunder storms.  I wimped out and broke the news to Kyle that we were going to be sleeping in our warm beds, under the protection of the roof.  He didn’t seem very thrilled with arrangement, but when he saw most others had the same idea, he reluctantly went along with the game plan.  Originally, Casey and his family invited Kyle to stay in their tent.  But with the threat of high winds, severe rains and thunder and lightening, camping indoors became the trend.  I can handle camping out when it’s cold and such, but when the skies are screaming and barreling in like a freight train, and the electricity is turning night into day, camping under trees on the ground is not not my cup of tea.  Although, Beth Planinsek informed me that everyone is instructed to camp out for the 25th Anniversary Fishing Derby next year.  For a special occasion like that one, I’m game and I’m sure Kyle won’t complain.

Dave (Boo) Planinsek, Shaun Rodgers, Jimmy Singer at the Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

The kids ran around playing dodge ball until it got dark, then they started playing tag.  Kyle came up to me and said, “Boy Aunt Heather, it gets hard to play tag in the dark, especially when I don’t have my glasses on.  Sometimes you have to tag someone even if you’re really not sure if they are playing or not.”  I laughed at that statement thinking, ‘Wonder who he tagged that wasn’t playing?’  I love seeing Kyle running around, playing with other kids, and I mean playing hard.  Abandoning all electronic devices and games and running in the mud and dirt with a game of old fashion tag.  That is what being a kid is all about!

Kyle finally caught a sun fish. Pappy is always on hand to help. Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Bob Dowler, longtime neighbor of the Planinsek’s, (his parents owned Sugarbush restaurant) made the popcorn in the big iron kettle on the fire.  The best popcorn ever!  Kyle assisted him in years past, but this year he was burning off a year’s worth of energy.  Eddie who was seated by mom administered the bag and Lori managed the salt.  They cracked me up!  That family is too much!

Before long, mom and I wanted to call it a night, yet we didn’t want to put a damper on Kyle’s fun, so I took mom home and had Kyle call me when he was ready.   Sure enough, as soon as I got home, which was only a five minute drive, Kyle called and said he was ready.  So back up over the ridge I drove, to pick up my little package.  Not that I mind at all.  He was getting out in the fresh air and hanging with a good bunch of kids.

Jimmy, Nina & Lisa hanging out at the Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

While winding down for the evening, Kyle instructed us that we, were to be up at 6:00 am, allowing us enough time to get ready and be back at the Planinsek Pavilion when breakfast was served at 7:00 am.  No worries, we are all morning people and usually I get up between 5:00 am and 6:00 am every day, anyway.  The hardest part of the evening was getting my “cruddy” nephew into the shower before he fell asleep in front of the fireplace.

Kyle pouting while Olivia looks on. Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Reluctantly, Kyle got up a little after 6:00 am, with some assistance from my dad and the dogs.  He was tried!  All the cool air and running around really knocked him down, in a good way.  Slowly but surely, we packed up the car and headed to our all day destination.  Mom and dad, who were really slow moving, met us later.

Earlier in the week, dad purchased Kyle’s bait so once we packed up the car we were good to go.  Before departing, Dad gave Kyle direction where to set up his fishing spot, to the left of the pond.  We were ready!

Once 8:00 am rolled around, all the activity from the night before resumed, kids buzzing around, adults gabbing and shooting the breeze, people eating and setting up their fishing spots.    Love the Fishing Derby!

Casey holding son Owen Olczak. Dave (Boo) in the background at the Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

The Derby officially starts at 9:00 am.  As part of the announcements, they gave a moment of silence to Robert Scavnicky, “Bobby”.  He pass away on December 15, 2012 at the age of 60.  They gave a very nice heartfelt account of Bobby’s life and his contributions to the Fishing Derby.  Being a member of Sacred Heart Church, and living on the Planinsek ridge, I knew Bobby.  Mostly in passing and to see him at the Fishing Derby and other local events.  He was always a truly nice guy.  That’s what I can sincerely say, he was a nice guy, very warming and welcoming and laid back.  Mom and dad knew him well and have always talked highly of him.  I can see why.  In fact, technically Bobby was my mom’s step brother, if you will.  His mom was married to my grandpap Chester for a brief period of time before he passed away in 1980.

Kids are braving the rain to catch their trophy rainbow trout! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Bobby’s sister Michele was part of the attendance.  At one point, Michele and mom were talking and mom commented that Michele used to babysit me when I was little.  Michele said with conviction, “O I remember this one, I don’t really remember the other ones but I remember Heather!”  Yikes!  Was I that bad?  Michele said I would cry a lot and I never wanted to be separated from my mommy.  That’s too funny, I was a mommy’s girl!   Mom said it wasn’t until about second grade did I become independent and I remained that way since.  I guess the big bad scary world was a bit too much for me to handle at first, until I got used to it.

While I’m still on the subject of Bobby, Friday night while sitting around the campfire, Mick, mom and me were shooting the breeze and we started talking about dates of those who have passed.  Fun topic of conversation I know, but it is what it is.  Lori interjected with dates that no one could remember.  Boy she is good!  We talked about my Uncle Walter and Aunt Mary Olczak, Casey’s grandparents, who passed in 1993 and 2002 respectively.  My Aunt Mary was a Planinsek, so that’s another branch of the tree that intertwines the Planinsek’s through marriage.

Ryan Hiles accepting his trophy from Dave Planinsek, for the largest rainbow trout at the Planinsek Fishing Derby Congratulations! 5/11/13

Naturally, Ryan always comes up in these conversations.  He passed away on October 23, 2001, being 24 years-old.  Mom commented to Mick that Nicholas, Bobby’s son, came to Ryan’s burial and stopped up at the house to help unload food and such, wanting to help out.  Really?  You know, sometimes I think I completely stepped out during that time, because there was a lot that happened and a ton of people around that I truly don’t remember.  Mom said he came down to the house right after we left the cemetery.  Sincerely, I have absolutely no recollection of him being there.  Still, I am grateful for the support!  Little acts of caring and sincerity can really make an impact on a person, even nearly 12 years later.  Thanks Nicholas!  I guess Bobby was able to instill some good attributes in his kid.

Now, getting back to the announcements.  Just before reviewing the rules of the fishing derby, it started to rain.  They blew the bugle and then it was a downpour.  In all honesty, I thought all the kids were going to take off for shelter and skip the fishing.  Nope!  These are tough ridgers!  All the kids stood in the rain, along side their parents, friends and relatives fishing.  It went on for a few hours because before I noticed it, it was around noon!  The rain was cold and continued off and on for most of the morning.  No one really cared how muddy they were getting, or how wet.  They were catching fish and having fun!

Casey’s family fished to our right including Grant and Olivia.  Little baby Owen was nearly a year old, so maybe next year little Olczak can participate.

I handed dad my umbrella. The pink polka dots really make it! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Dad mostly helped Kyle, who as tradition dictates was difficult at first.  He keeps making excuses for not casting right, and not catching anything and on and on and on.  At one point, I thought dad might throw Kyle in the pond.  Not literally, but he was pushing our buttons.  Saying Kyle was being difficult is me being nice.  His attitude was out of control, he needs to listen to what he’s being told and not assume he knows everything.  Plus he needs to be patient!  He has to realize that every time you cast your line in the water, you might not get a fish.  Apparently Kyle didn’t get the memo but I’m here to say, that’s part of the sport!

A little while later, Lisa Singer or her Sister Nina Enfinger came up to me to check in and shoot the breeze.  She said, “It would be nice if Kyle won.”  What a sweet comment, after all, almost all of the kids present, were her nieces, nephews and cousins.  To be concerned for Kyle was way too nice!   I turned to her and said, “I don’t, not with the way he’s acting.”  She understood where I was coming from, no judgement placed!  I certainly want Kyle to do good and win, but I don’t want him to be rewarded for acting like a spoiled brat.

Eventually, Kyle did manage to catch a small sun fish.  He was more thrilled that he was no longer in the category of ‘not catching anything’, over actually catching the fish, even if the fish was not impressive, not even good enough for the frying pan.  I’m was just happy he was happy.

I will admit, later after dad had enough of Kyle’s complaining and attitude, and once we took a lunch break, Kyle tried his had at fishing again.  This time he was like a different person.  He was being good, listening and fishing better.  His casting was getting pretty good, his patience was stabilizing and his attitude was now sportsmanlike.  Maybe it had something to do with me telling him, his pappy left because he was fed up with his behavior.  Kyle was in shock.  It never occurred to him that dad wasn’t going to listen to him all day.  Maybe that’s what he needed to straighten him up.

The day moved along as it always does with a lot of food, drinks and conversation.  In order to cover all costs, ensuring the Fishing Derby continues year after year, they raffle off prizes and such.  I won a ceramic 2013 Planinsek Fishing Derby mug, which I realized as I was writing this blog that I left it there.  Note to self, I will need to try and retrieve it!

Kids are anxiously waiting for their names to be drawn to pick a prize! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

There is a 50/50 raffle and the day doesn’t come to an end until the children’s raffle.  Throughout the day, parents and kids alike put a ticket in for a kid with their name on it.  All the prizes are on display.  Once a name is called, the child claims their prize until all the toys and such are gone or all the tickets have been drawn.

During this time, I will shout of my pride in Kyle.  With all that went on during first part of the day, Kyle really redeemed himself.  Without me saying anything and only noticing through observation, Kyle began to pick out toys for Grant.  He wanted to get him prizes that he would like.  Kyle even told Grant to go to the table and pick something out, on Kyle’s turn.  I stood there off to the side, unbeknownst to Kyle and watched the giving pour forth from my little man!   Boy that kid can act like an ungrateful spoiled child one minute, and a sincerely giving little man the next!  Maybe he is listening to us after all.

The rain couldn’t deter these fisherman from their trophy rainbow trout! Planinsek Fishing Derby 5/11/13

Then to really steal my heart, as his name was called yet again, Kyle looked around and gave his turn to one of the Enfinger kids because at that point the little boy only had one prize.  What?  Love was just overflowing from my heart toward Kyle’s small actions.  As I’ve always told Kyle, it’s the thought and the intent that really count!  Personally, I was just impressed that he thanked Casey for putting in more tickets on his behalf.

Then, the acts of kindness don’t just stop there, he picked up this kitchen utensil, brought it to me and said, “This is for Gigi”.  What a sweetheart!  He also assigned a few prizes for others, beside himself.  That’s what being part of a family is about.  That’s also what good sportsmanship and being a good person means!

The day was a success!  This year the new record came in the form of a brother and sister team.  Ryan Hiles caught a 23 inch rainbow trout and his sister Jenny, who was fishing right beside Kyle, caught a 12 and three quarters inch large mouth bass.  Great job guys!  Can’t wait for next year!  The 25th Annual Louise Planinsek Fishing Derby!

Read about last years Fishing Derby Want to Go Fishing? 

A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.  ~Bruce Lee

Casey, holding Kyle & Nicole at Kyle’s Baptism 10/28/01

When Kyle was just a baby, he would throw the typical child temper tantrum.  Nicole used to say “2.2″ every time this happened.  Meaning, Kyle’s attitude would change from pleasant little boy to screaming little demon in about 2.2 seconds, literally.  It was actually hilarious.  Kyle would be a happy baby one minute, then he would get this wrinkle between the eyebrows just before the tears flowed.  2.2!  This behavior didn’t last very long, usually, nor did it happen frequently.  But enough to notice the signs and recognize the storm brewing.  Of course, it was a very short window of detection, if at all.  Then again, sometimes I provoked the winds to start brewing.

Certainly, once the tantrums started, I couldn’t help but antagonize the clearly upset child.  Not so much when he was an infant, but definitely by the time he was able to walk.  Then, there were those other occasions, when I would nudge his behavior just to get a rise out of him.  Not to be mean.  No!  I was teaching Kyle valuable life lessons, early.  Sort of.

Example time!  I know, I’ve talked about this before, but it warrants another pass.  Kyle loved his matchbox cars.  Yes, he would drive them around but mostly he would line them up on the coffee table, very precisely bumper to bumper, trunk to hood.  He did this in long perfect, well thought out rows, until the entire coffee table was covered in cars.  It was quite amazing watching him spend all that time creating a used car parking lot.  Every now and again, just to throw him off his game, I wait for him to turn around to retrieve another car to add, and my foot would happen to tip the coffee table over so all the cars rolled off.  Now it’s not as bad as it sounds.  Yes it was hilarious, especially the first time when he was in utter shock and didn’t understand what had happened.  Then he got wise to me.  2.2!

On a side note, what was the life lesson for tormenting the child?  I wanted him to get used to things disrupting his perfection, his obsessive compulsive behavior.  I wanted him to be able to handle things not going his way, and throwing a monkey wrench in his system so he would learn to adjust.  Did it work?  Yes and no.  I’ll talk about that one day.

Nicole holding our bottle lover while I took a picture at Chad’s wedding

It would be completely inaccurate to say that most tantrums were not caused by me, or involved me to some degree.  But I will admit, they were not all started because of my antagonistic personality.  Kyle played a role and lent a helping hand to bring on the 2.2.  But then again, I may have prolonged the fit of rage, a bit.  Especially when the tantrum involved his bottle!

You see, Kyle loved his bottle, much like myself when I was a baby.  When he would get mad, to show his disdain, he would get up, walk out the front door onto the porch and toss that bottle as hard as he could into the yard.  This was done with a permanent scowl look on his face.  We would all laugh, just because he was too comical.  Seriously!  I would say, “I guess he’s mad” and then Nicole would turn to me and say, “2.2″.  Usually that was my cue to torment a little.  He was way too adorable to pass up and hilarious.  I couldn’t resist!  Always retrieving the discarded milk vessel, I made sure it eventually made its way back to Kyle.  If he was really upset or angry, he would show me, with a glare that could have melted ice, while going back whence he came, and tossing the bottle off the porch returning it to the grassy plain.

What caused such behavior?  Usually, it was due to a misunderstanding between me and Kyle when we were playing.  He wanted me to play a specific way and he misunderstood me for someone to follow his orders.  Hence, I wouldn’t play the way he wanted me to, usually with his cars or Thomas the Tank.  In not bowing down to his direct orders, I was teaching him to play with others, learning to take turns and share in the fun and not being such a bossy little boy.  Actually, let’s get to the heart of the matter.  I was not going to have a two year old tell me how to play cars, I didn’t care where he threw that bottle.

If  there was a second demonstration of his attitude, I would again retrieve the bottle out of the yard and put it up on the mantle where he could see it.  That ticked him off even more, especially when I would act like I was drinking from it.  Ok, that’s a bit of teasing but he needs to learn to deal with all kinds of people and situations throughout life.  I was giving him a head start.  More than not, this action ended with mom and dad yelling at me to stop teasing the baby.  Who was the child and who was the adult?

It was all in good fun and he was just so stinking cute, I couldn’t stop myself.

Kyle wasn’t happy at his Baptism 10/28/01

Luckily, we have gotten past the bottle throwing demonstration and moved into the most annoying, not even slightly cute, world of whining and back talking.  If this was a kingdom, Kyle would rule over it.  Don’t get me wrong, Kyle is a great kid!  He truly and genuinely is, except for that part of him.  It’s a minor part, but it will devour us all if left untreated.

After we participated in the Ropes Course at the Ligonier Camp & Conference Center for Kyle’s youth group, last weekend, dad said he needed our help.  I will admit I was tied too, after all we were there from 9:00 am till around 12:30 pm.  But when there’s chores to be done, we need to get them tackled.  My motto, dive in and get it over with as quickly as we can.  Kyle’s motto?  Whine about it and complain the entire time, and let’s not forget move as slowly as humanly possible.  It was a long morning and the afternoon was going to get longer.

Dad wanted to chop some firewood and stack it.  Ok, not an easy task for Kyle on a normal day, not to mention he was physically tired before we even started.  But he just wouldn’t stop with the attitude and the back talking.  All you hear is “Why do I have to do that?” Whhhhyyyyy?”

Let’s also get this straight, I have no issues with Kyle asking questions and understanding what is being asked of him and why.  But what I can’t handle, is when you give him an answer and he continues asking the same question over and over.  Plus you add in the whining, only for the sole purpose of being irritating.  Now that I can not deal with!  He only asks and asks again because he doesn’t like the answer.  Tough!  Sometimes I believe Kyle thinks he’s going to get his own way if he continues on the same course.  Nope!  Not on my watch.  I’ve always told him ‘I invented stubborn.’

Joel holding Kyle at the Planinsek Pavilion

For part of the day, Kyle was a real treat, especially on the ears.  I truly hate it when he doesn’t appreciate what he has and what he gets.  Would you believe, during his whining and back talking, he had the audacity to ask me to take him to the store to get some of his playing cards?  Seriously?  I don’t know what person in their right mind would do such a thing after his behavior, except Kyle!

Helping to raise Kyle since he was just three months old, I know for a fact, that I, nor my family have ever tolerated such acts, completely spoiled.  Does he genuinely think this tactic is going to work?  Loving Kyle with my whole heart, I can not in good faith allow this to happen.  Yes, that’s my way of saying he got in big trouble. No video games, no computer, nadda and he still had to continue with the work, no matter how slow he was moving.

It’s weird, sometimes, not all of the time, this happens on Friday and Saturday, but by the time Sunday rolls around again, he is back to being a normal child.  Manageable.  Odd. I’ve actually noted this for some time now.

Kyle has been whinnying for years now, and I am at a loss of how to stop it.  Even mom said that none of us have ever whined.  We would have most certainly gotten the belt.  Plus, it really was not in our nature to act like that.  Back talking?  Yes.  I will admit I did participate in that activity when I was younger, but certainly not at Kyle’s age and not to the persistence that he does.  Even then, mom would literally wash my mouth out with soap.  Maybe I should try the bubble method?  Although softy pap pap would probably stop me.

I’m going to have to get crafty and come up with a new method to conquer his madness, before I go mad.  Hopefully this weekend brings a new attitude with our little man.  After all, Iron Man 3 came out today and we both really want to see it.  Plus, we’re ordering Jioio’s Pizza, bonus!!

If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell?  ~1 Corinthians 12:17

The Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia Youth Group got together at the Ligonier Camp & Conference Center to participate in the ropes course 4/27/13

This past Saturday Kyle’s youth group had a fun activity, the ropes course!  What is a ropes course?  I had no idea at first.  Before the day began, all I knew was that Kyle signed me up to join him and the rest of the Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia youth group on their chosen outing.

Sometimes, I am just amazed how God works, even blessing us and our outing with such a pretty sunny day.  Enjoying the cool bright morning drive, we headed out to Ligonier, making our way up a secluded side road just outside the town.  The ropes course was held at the Ligonier Camp and Conference Center.  Great!  I was never there, and what are we doing again?

Mikaela Milko showing how to wear a babushka at the Ropes Course in Ligonier 4/27/13

After meeting our counselors, Marty and Jeb, they led our group about a quarter of a mile up a hill towards the woods.  Unbeknownst to everyone at the time, our real journey was about to begin.

We started off with the standard, ‘get in a circle and introduce yourself’.  However, they added a fun twist.  We were to introduce ourselves and tell everyone what our super power would be.  I chose flying, while others chose super strength, invisibility, mind reading and such.  Ok, neat idea to get everyone thinking and listening to our neighbor.  Where’s the ropes course?

Next, we completed a serious of individual and small group exercises.  We did the listening game of Shlaw and a fun sword game.  Comical as it may seem, and it was, we ran around with one arm acting as a sword and the other hand positioned in the middle of our backs, acting as our week point to be struck with an opposing sword.  Yes, we ran around in a large yard that was marked off, trying to strike each other down.  This is what really cracked me up.  When a person was slain, they were not permitted to just kneel down and be out of the game.  O no!  We had to act out a dramatic death scene, dropping to our knees.  That was just getting us warmed up.  There’s more!

The Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia’s Youth Group participating in the Ropes Course 4/27/13

Let’s not forget when we teamed up in groups of four and acted as a dragon, trying to get the other dragons tails, a.k.a. the handkerchief.  Then, there were the teams of two.  Only one person could see to guide the other.  Toward what you may ask?  To pick up stuffed animals and propel the soft ammunition at our opponents of course.  At first, we were allowed to speak to our temporarily blinded partner in crime.  That was just for practice.  The second time we played, there was no talking, only reading body language.  For me, I had Mikaela who is about Kyle’s age.  So I basically drug her around the large grassy area and used her arms as extensions of mine.

Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia Youth Group figuring our the Ropes Course in Ligonier 4/27/13

When do the ropes course come into play?  That’s what I was wondering!  Not that I wasn’t having fun and learning the hidden lessons with each of these games.  But I wanted to swing like Tarzan.

Then came our first group activity!  Marty and Jeb borrowed a water bottle and gave us instructions to move the water bottle of its current position on the ground to Marty’s hand.  Everyone was to use at least a pointer finger and a pinky finger to move the bottle together as a group.  Yes all at once, all eighteen of us around a small water bottle.   That certainly took teamwork, and everyone following the called out instructions from those with strategic insight.  Did we do it?  Yes!

Me assisting Kyle on the Ropes Course in Ligonier. A fun activity with his Youth Group! 4/27/13

Seriously, the entire time that we were working on this challenge The Wonder Pets song was playing in my head.  Kyle loved that cartoon and he used to sing the theme song all the time.  Indulge me for a moment…
Linny: “The phone, the phone is ringing!”
Ming-Ming: “The phone, we’ll be right there!”
Tuck: “The phone, the phone is ringing!”
Linny: “There’s an animal in trouble…”
Ming-Ming: “There’s an animal in trouble…”
Tuck: “There’s an animal in trouble somewhere!”
———————
Tuck: “A baby [animal]
Ming-Ming: “This is se-rious!”
Tuck: “We have to help him/her”
Linny: “Let’s save the [animal]!”
Tuck and Ming-Ming or All then All: “Let’s save the [animal]!”
———————
Linny: “Linny,”
Tuck: “Tuck,”
Ming-Ming: “And Ming-Ming, too!”
All: “We’re Wonder Pets and we’ll help you!”
Linny: “What’s gonna work?”
Tuck and Ming-Ming or All: “Teamwork!”
Linny: “What’s gonna work?”
Tuck and Ming-Ming or All: “Teamwork!”
———————
All: “Wonder Pets! Wonder Pets! We’re on our way
To help a baby [animal] and save the day!”
Ming-Ming: “We’re not too big,”
Tuck: “And we’re not too tough,”
All: “But when we work together we’ve got the right stuff!
Go, Wonder Pets! Yay!

Part of the team building exercises including using your blind partner as a bomber 4/27/13

Naturally, at the time I couldn’t remember the entire song, but regardless, it seemed to fit our situation.  Anyway, once we accomplished the first water bottle challenge, we were given the same activity only with another twist.  We needed to have someone place their nose, two people add their elbows and two pinkies (I believe) on the bottle.  All while EVERYONE, was touching the bottle in some way.  We needed to lift our object off the ground with a nose, two elbows, two pinkies and thirteen fingers on the bottle, at the same time.  Then move as a group toward our goal, Marty, to deliver the object of focus.  It was a bit awkward, but we did it!

Now the ropes course?  Not quite yet.  We had to sit in a circle among the trees and discuss the lessons we learned with all the previously executed exercises, including the themes of strategy and teamwork.  This was a way to encourage everyone to speak up and continue to be an integral part of the team.  Not to mention ensuring everyone was learning the lessons taught.

The Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia Youth Group working out a strategy to the Rope Course 4/27/13

We started moving toward the theme of the ropes course when Marty and Jeb were talking about safety, teamwork and strategy.  Something along those lines.  I was too excited for the long anticipated “ropes course”.  I had already built up this grandiose idea of what we were going to do.  Better yet, how I was going to fly among the trees and jump from one set of ropes to the other hundreds of feet in the air.  Or climb a rope with one hand that was over fifty feet high.  All of which did not happen, it was much harder than that.

We’re just getting started on the day. Ligonier Camp & Conference Center 4/27/13

After I was forced out of my dream state, I realized the time was at hand.  Our team cheer was the youth group motto, Helping Hands.  On the count of three we broke and headed toward our next destination.

Now the ropes course!  Eighteen of us lined up standing on a log.  We needed to shimmy around a bit to get our group to fit, but we managed.  Then, we needed to split into two groups to tackle the course from each end.  Simple enough.  No!  No one, not from either side was allowed to touch the ground and the adults were not allowed to talk.  If we touched the ground, then everyone would have to go back to the beginning and start all over again.  Did that happen?  O many many times.  I was the reason we started over once, jumping into the side of a tree as I lost my balance.  Kyle fell at least once, not to mention all the other participants who followed our lead to the ground.

Sacred Heart / Saint Cecilia Youth Group at the Ligonier Camp & Conference Center 4/27/13

The ropes course was a serious of balance type of obstacles we needed to cross, working our way back to the starting line, the log.  No one was allowed to touch the ground, and everyone had to make it back.

Team building exercises before the Ropes Course at the Ligonier Camp & Conference Center 4/27/13

Along the way we realized the strengths and weaknesses of our team members.  With every start, we learned more and more and realized how to adjust to make our plan work.  From the very beginning, I knew I could help Kyle.  It was just like we were snowboarding and I was helping him with his balance.  Although, I will admit Kyle started to do pretty good on his own with each pass.  In fact, at the one intersection where we had one rope to walk on and one rope to hold on to, I lost my balance and went backward, holding on for dear life.  Please keep in mind we were only about four or five inches off the ground but it was the fear of touching the ground and making everyone start over.  No one wants to let the team down.  Kyle held his position, whereas I could have completely thrown him off balance.  He used his body to project us forward allowing both us a steady passage to the tree.  Nicely done buddy!

There was a lot of teamwork and “helping hands” along the way.  Ultimately, since one big challenge was crossing paths with the second half of our team, we sent the shortest of the group through first, while helpers were posted along the way.

Without my help, but with the assistance and guidance of others, Kyle, along with the rest of our vertically challenged kids made it to the end.  Great job guys!  We nearly got everyone through, then we biffed it again and unfortunately ran out of time.  I spent the majority of the exercise on the double ropes, which I think I mastered.  Although the cramping in my feet and the burning in my thighs might argue the opposite.

We ended the day with another recap and a prayer before tackling our lunch.  By that time everyone was mentally and physically exhausted, but in an good way.  What a great idea!  Asking who presented this activity to the group, Isaak raised his hand.  This was a perfect way to really get to know your group and allow everyone to make a contribution to the team!  I would love to do it again.

We left there feeling pretty good about ourselves.  It was the teamwork and the ability to lend a helping held and accept assistance from others.  God made us all differently so we will rely on one another.  Simple as it may seem, that’s exactly what we did!  As Henry Ford once said, “Coming together is a beginning.  Keeping together is progress.  Working together is success.”

When I was younger,  had to learn the fundamentals of basketball.  You can have all the physical ability in the world, but you still have to know the fundamentals.  ~Michael Jordan

3rd Place in the 2002 World Haidong Gumdo Championships in South Korea, Pyeong 7/2002

I know we just wrapped up March madness, but I do have a good story related to the season.  Please don’t be mistaken, I don’t watch sports, and yes that includes basketball.  Being a Latrobe graduate, basketball seemed to be the gym class activity of choice.  So I can certainly play b-ball, not well and not with the grace of our professional athletes, but I can dribble while running and shoot hoops.  The basics.  Actually, I find the activity of standing in front of a basketball hoop and shooting over and over again relaxing, not that I do it much.

Did I ever watch a live basketball game?  Yes I have.  When I was in high school, my friend Maggie’s mom took us to watch a basketball game at St. Vincent college.  Granted that’s not the big time, but I did have fun.  In fact, we were sitting in the front row on the bleachers and one of the players tripped, took flight and flew into the air and landed directly in my lap.  Being in high school and never watching a real basketball game before, made that experience all the more exciting!  I truly felt apart of the game and I did my part to assist, even if it was just cushioning a fall, even if I had no choice.

Over the years I was given tickets to basketball games but I was always busy.  Once when I was heading to Boston for a karate tournament, a good friend of mine offered me four tickets to watch two of the big six play or the final four or whatever. (don’t quote me on that, I do remember the season was approaching the end).  I would have actually taken him up on the tickets, except my Haidong Gumdo (sword) competition was taking place the same night and I didn’t want to miss that.  Placing third and being the only junior belt at the time and competing against black belts made that win all the more memorable.  Go me!

Haidong Gumdo (sword) training in South Korea with Master Han with a thousand year old sword. Bamboo Cutting 7/2002

Well, I think I’ve established that I am not a sports person and I pay no attention.  So now the anticipated story.  For a few years in my very early career, I worked as an assistant manager at a clothing store called Aeropostale.  At the time it was owned by Macy’s.  Periodically, we would have sales throughout the store.  Usually the sales and specials were accompanied by gimmicks.  The themes were decorated among the stacks and racks of garments as well as the front window displays.  The one year, corporate sent all the stores large basketball stickers.  We were instructed to stick them on stacks of cloths on the tables and on the displays and write the price of the item.  Simple enough, I can handle that, playing with stickers!  No big deal.  That is until someone questioned me on these themed embellishments sprinkled throughout the store.

Aeropostale was located on the upper level of Westmoreland Mall, where it remains today.  Just as I was walking toward the front of the store, a man was walking past and stopped to look in.  Nothing unusual, it happened all the time.  However, this gentlemen turned toward me and asked what’s with the basketball stickers.  At the same time my sales associate, Tony was within ear shot of me.  Tony was a sports fanatic, especially loving basketball.  He also knew I was not.  At that moment I took it upon myself to show my sports knowledge and answer the passerby-er.

Me cutting straw with a thousand year old sword, Haidong Gumdo (sword) training in South Korea 7/2002

With almost a cocky ‘I can answer that one’ type of attitude I blurted out, “It’s for the NFL!”  Would you believe I didn’t think of what I was saying and nodded my head like, ‘I know what I’m talking about’, when clearly I did not. The man gave me a puzzled look, looked around for another moment and just walked away.  I turned around with a huge grin on my face like I just did something good.  Tony on the other hand was trying so hard to hold in laughter I thought he was going to burst.  His face was all red and he actually needed a minute to compose himself before addressing the conversation he just witnessed.

Tony said, “Heather, the NFL?”  I gave him the world’s biggest smile of sheer pride, being truly proud of myself for knowing the answer and said “Ya March Madness! B-Ball!”  He busted out laughing and said “The NFL?  The National Football League?  You mean NCAA?”  As he was saying it, my self assurance was deflated and I was fully aware of what just unfolded and how stupid the entire conversation was.

We both had a good laugh.  No wonder that man was completely puzzled by my comment.  Personally, I didn’t care I gave him incorrect information and I looked like a knucklehead, because if he was so smart he would have never asked me in the first place.  I guess it just goes to show, watch where you get your information because no matter how confident or adamant a person is with their answer, they could still be one hundred percent wrong!

He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland

Kyle & his pappy for his first Christmas… love the red long underwear. Dad has the same pair 2001

Kyle and his pappy.  What else can I say?  They are like two peas in a pod.  Without question, Kyle looks up to his pappy, and my dad shares the same admiration for Kyle.  They definitely have a unique bond, its strong and very reminiscent of the relationship between Ryan and dad, but is truly more like my pappy and Ryan.  It must be the grandfather, grandson combination.

Ryan and dad were tight, both having such a passion for hunting and fishing.  Now don’t get me wrong they were typical father and son, but really pretty close.  I guess it helped that they spent hours in the woods together on hunting trips, countless fishing opportunities, and too much time in the garage working on cars to have been anything other.  But before Ryan really truly got into any of these, he had a tight bond with our pappy, my dad’s dad.

Ryan and my pap’s relationship, very much resembled Kyle and my dad’s.  Ryan and Kyle are both lifesavers, whether they knew it or not.  After my pap had his second leg amputated, Ryan stayed with him, a lot.  After my brother passed away suddenly, Kyle stayed with us, a lot.  My pappy died when Ryan was in the third grade, so our interaction with him stopped at a young age, but thankfully Kyle and dad are still going strong.  Both boys helped with the healing process.  After all, who can stay depressed or upset or even stationary with a little man running around.  Not in our family!  Both Ryan and Kyle indirectly helped my pap and my dad, respectively, carry on through horrible situations.  They were both air to our lungs, both gifts from God to help us survive.  Kyle was, and continues to be a reminder of Ryan and what a special gift children are.  I guess that holds true, not just for dad but for the family as a whole.

Kyle grabbing pappy’s hat. Aunt Mary is in the background. Piper Reunion 2002

Well, I think you get the comparison between Ryan and his pap and Kyle and his pap.  Like anyone in the Piper family, they hunt and fish.  Yep, dad has already taken Kyle two years in a row for mentor hunting.  The second year, bringing home a deer.  Dad couldn’t have been more proud, just as he was with all us.

Kyle does like to deer hunt, but maybe doesn’t carry the same passion as dad.  Now fishing is a different story.  Kyle really seems to enjoy fishing.  In fact, every year he inquires about the start of the fishing season, especially the annual Planinsek Fishing Derby (Want to Go Fishing?).  The cynical side of me says, it’s a favorite with Kyle because the sport requires a lot of sitting as opposed to hunting, which sometimes involves a bit more hiking.  Either way, dad takes Kyle fishing whenever he can.  We all join in on that fun, but like I said, I have yet to meet anyone else with such a devotion for hunting and fishing like dad.

Dad & Kyle watching TV…. this picture says it all!

Even though dad is a hunter, he loves and appreciates animals, like another little someone I know.  There’s no denying it, dad is an outdoorsy man.  It’s also noted that Kyle really is not, although he certainly shares the love for all of God’s creatures.  Growing up, dad couldn’t get enough of National Geographic and Marty Stouffer! Loyal Traveling Television Kyle has seemed to adopt this intense interest in animals as well.  Seriously!  Some of Kyle’s top picks for shows include Too Cute!, Weird True & Freaky, and Big Cat Diaries (one of my favorites too).  Basically anything on Nat Geo and Animal Planet.  Dad takes his love of outdoors and his eagerness for hunting a step further and enjoys watching  Outdoor Channel, Sportsman Channel or the Trophy Hunting Channel.  Kyle, like the rest of us, doesn’t really enjoy watching people pull fish from a pond or shoot a Mountain Goat.  But we do like watching the hibernation of bears and the strength of ants.

Sports and sports teams have never been big in our house.  The Piper’s have been known to play a mean game of baseball, but that’s about the extent of it, at least in our immediate family.  Dad never played any sports, having to start working and making posts when he was nine-years-old.  The option wasn’t there for him to have that interest.  Now Kyle has had every opportunity to participate in sports, but he has chosen another path.  Forget it, if there is football, baseball, basketball or even hockey on the TV, no one in the family is watching it, including Kyle.  I’ve had Kyle involved in Pee Wee football, basketball (which what a real treat for the eyes) soccer, gymnastics, running and swimming.  Nope, no real interest.  Don’t get me wrong, he had fun playing with the other kids and getting out, but there is definitely no love and desire to play these activities for the sport of it.

Kyle and dad, what a pair.  You should see them watching TV together.  They are always leaning and snuggling between the two, truly enjoying the company of the other.

Dad was always like that with us as kids.  I personally used dad’s arm as a pillow and fall asleep.  But I must admit, dad has fallen victim to the grandson rule and monarchy.  Dad doesn’t always let Kyle get away with things, but I would have to say more than not.  Certainly, ten times what we were able to get away with as kids.  Yep, Kyle owns us!

Kyle & his pappy napping…I think I caught dad nipping into Kyle’s bottle c. 2002

Now back to the similarity.  I’ve mentioned it a time or two, Kyle loves math.  Dad has always been good at basic math and measurements.  Now dad never had the opportunity to be education to the level Nicole was, but I bet dad could have done so.  Kyle and dad are both quick with numbers, rattling off and adding up prices and such.  Quick story time!  I know I’ve mentioned this one a time or two, but what the heck, it’s a good one.

Once, when we were visiting Nicole, we decided to tour one of the Smithsonian Museums.  Naturally, Kyle’s pappy had to buy him a souvenir.  Whatever the item was, dad got him two.  As dad and Kyle walked up to the register and before the lady could ring them up, Kyle spitted out the total.  Not only was it the total of the two items but Kyle figured in the tax.  He was actually off by a couple of pennies and that didn’t fly with Kyle.  He questioned the register and unbeknownst to Kyle, the tax was different then ours locally, so that explained the discrepancy.

Dad does the same thing when figuring out mileage and measurements, especially board footage.  Yep both quick with basic numbers!  I guess it’s there thing.

Pappy & his Kyle on Kyle’s 1st Birthday 7/30/02

Dad and Kyle are also super friendly people.  For Kyle to be that way as a youngster, made me a bit nervous, but now that he has grown into a young man, it’s nice to see.  Dad will say ‘hi’ to any stranger on the street with a sincere smile, just like Ryan used to.  Kyle shares that trait as well.  Dad will look anyone in the eye, give them a good strong handshake and present a warming smile, before beginning a conversation with anyone.  Kyle with start up conversations with adults and kids alike.  He is learning the proper way to shake hands with someone and to greet them, but he always had the ability to make friends and be inviting.  All good qualities.

Dad is not like the typical ‘guy’ when it comes to directions.  He hates being lost and has no trouble stopping to ask for assistance.  Kyle has always joined dad in that demeanor.  Even in the grocery store, Kyle is the first to speak up and say “Can I just ask Aunt Heather?”  That’s my man, never has been shy about asking for anything!

I guess I’ve discussed personality traits and interests but I haven’t addressed body types.  Kyle is build exactly like my dad.  They both have a wide thick body, solid stocky legs.  Funny enough, their feet are even shaped the same.  Even when dad was at his thinnest when he was in the army and Kyle was at his leanest, neither one were built like Ryan, long and lanky.  They both have a study structure.

Kyle and his pappy, what a pair!  They certainly both need each other and even though they are similar in many ways, their opposing nature truly helps the other out.  They are a good team!

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Who Does Kyle Favor More, His Dad?
Who Does Kyle Favor More, Aunt Nikki?

Only an aunt can give hugs like a mother, can keep secrets like a sister, and share love like a friend.  ~Unknown

Kyle & his Aunt Nikki at Kyle’s First Holy Communion 3/2009

There are so many other instances in which Ryan was channeled through Kyle, but there are more noticeable ones between Aunt Nikki and Kyle.  The resemblance is borderline scary.

Kyle, mirroring his Aunt Nikki is not a new concept.  Actually, that’s an understatement.  We’ve been observing this behavior since Kyle was able to walk.  Even at a very young age he began to show his personality and specific traits.  These unique traits really stood out and continue to do so, giving us glimpses of who Kyle is going to be as time passes.  Unaware and unintentionally, Kyle has personified my sister, proven true time and time again.  Before I get into details, I do want to make note that Kyle is certainly his dad but really shares a resemblance to his Aunt Nikki, behaviorally and physically.

Let’s start at the beginning, puzzles.  Yes, those pieces of curvy cut cardboard containing sections of an image, to be put together by a patient soul, resulting in a complete picture.  Kyle has always loved puzzles!  From the time mom gave him his first small puzzle, he seemed to graduate to thousand piece sets by the age of three.  Kyle would sit there and put them together for hours until completion.  For the record, I want to say I hate puzzles, definitely not my bag but my sister has the patience for such entertainment.  At one point, Kyle referred to himself as “Puzzle Boy”.  While putting a puzzle together, as we all watched him because he expected us to, Kyle turned to my dad and said, “Look pap pap I’m puzzle boy!”  Way to cute! Later on, unbeknownst to us at the time, this behavior would escalate to Lego’s.

Nicole was not much of a builder like Kyle or Ryan, but just like puzzles she can figure out the pattern to put it back together.  She has the even temper to sit and sort out all the pieces and group them together for Kyle, acting as his assistant.  That’s one of the ways they enjoy spending time together.  Me?  Heck no!  I’ve tried to sit with Kyle and sort puzzle pieces and Legos and I’ve found out that I have no patience and no desire.  I enjoy watching Kyle’s progress and seeing his satisfaction of another job well done, as we all do, but to actually get into the thick of it, nope!  Nicole, Ryan and Kyle all have that engineering gene, which seems to run in mom’s side of the family.

Kyle loves his puzzles & Aunt Nikki is there to assist

Much like my sister, Kyle always did have an engineering mind.  He thinks things through and always tries to come up with a better solution to a product design.  Seriously?  Yes!  He tends to examine objects as if dissecting them to see how they work and how they would be better if designed differently.   I’ve heard Kyle countless times say, ‘It would be better if they just did it this way or do it that way’.  I wish I could remember an instance, but they are escaping me at the moment.

Going hand-in-hand with engineering is math.  Let’s just discuss Kyle’s love of math.  It’s always been his subject of choice and much like Nicole, they both love the structure of numbers.  As of now, Kyle has made known his talent for math and is proud of this skill.  They both appreciate art, but that’s clearly not their bag.  I tried for years and years to get Kyle into drawing and painting, nope.  It wasn’t who he was suppose to be, and I accept that.  He loves math!

Kyle and Nicole are both ‘play it by the rules’, ‘play it safe’ type of individuals.  Neither one physically can’t break the rules, literally, without being sick about it.  Once when Kyle and I were hiking up through the woods, we came across a No Trespassing sign.  He was probably four or so.  I knew the marker was placed there by my neighbors.  I also knew I was allowed on their property.  Kyle stood there, right below the sign and would not continue on our course of action.  In fact, Kyle usually never leaves my side, but this time he would not follow my lead.  It became a stand off, he wouldn’t cross the invisible line, made by the No Trespassing sign.  He just pointed to the instructions outlined on the white paper in bold black letters.  I laughed and challenged him.  On this particular walk, we brought our quads and parked them off the path before deciding to explore on foot.  As I disappeared into the thicket to try and pressure Kyle to follow, he turned around and headed back to his quad to wait for me.  He upheld the rules, no matter what!  What really cracks me up, is he wouldn’t stand there waiting for me, he wanted to sit down and wait.  Very Nicole!

Now don’t get me wrong, Ryan and I never completely disregard rules, but we didn’t hold them to our heart either.  Some rules are to protect us and our neighbors, and some rules have a little bit of wiggle room.  At least that’s how I view them.  I’ve always taught Kyle, if you choose to break the rules (ya right) know the rules and know the consequences to your actions.  If you get busted doing wrong, then you have to accept the punishment, no question.  That might not be a good thing to teach a child, but I also wanted Kyle to be able to think for himself and do what’s right, even if it is ultimately breaking rules.  Moral law is higher and more important than man made.

Neither one, Nicole or Kyle, are very adventurous.  Actually, I take that back, in recent times, Nicole has spread her wings and enjoys adventure.  Let’s not get silly, she is still a play-it-safe type of girl but she has enjoyed exploring new local fare, traveling and investing in new endeavors.  After all she is co-founder of The Piper Corporation, as well as SpyRing and Thrill of the Hunt.  A huge step for Nicole, heck a huge step for anyone, taking on entrepreneurship.  Kyle is part of the company too, after all he is our consultant.  However, at this point, he has the least to loose and participates the least.

Aunt Nikki helping our little Kyle with his boots.. his big toe was probably sticking up…

Making a decision doesn’t always come easy to Nicole or Kyle.  Sometimes it takes Nicole six years before she can make a decision and stick to it.  Well, maybe that’s an exaggeration but I’m not that far off the mark.  Example.  A little while after Nicole purchased her house, she wanted to change the colors of the walls.  Great!  I offered to help her pick out the paint and add the colors to the walls.  Sincerely, my plan was to wrap it up in a weekend, maybe come back the following weekend to touch up.  Friday night Nicole and I hit the paint store to pick out colors.  Rambling off what I think she should use for the trim, walls, and accent walls, I could tell Nicole was struggling with seeing my vision.  Instantly, Nicole became stressed and wouldn’t commit to anything.  Her solution?  She decided to purchase small samples of the colors as well as similar shades to see which one she liked the best.  Ok, I can live with that.  Once we got back to her place, Nicole had me paint large squares of colors on her one wall in the living-room.  Looked like a quasi Mondrian.  We both stepped back to examine our choices, and instantly I knew what colors would look great.  I was ready to go back to the store, get the supplies and begin work.  Nope, not Nicole.  She said, “Well, I don’t know.  Just wait, let me think about this!”  Stating a fact, I said, “Nicole I would rather get started on it tonight so we wrap this up by Sunday.”  She didn’t care.  Making a hard and fast decision was not going to happen.  I even tried to help her out by saying, “If you don’t like it, I will repaint it for you.”  Nope.  Still not budging.  Just like Kyle, holding strong to a decision until it has been thought through and through.  Do you know, it took her one full year to pick the colors for her living-room, dining-room and foyer?  It became a big joke.  Every time I would go and visit her, I would examine the large squares painted hap-hazardously on the wall and ask, “Nice artwork you got”.  That was usually replied with a grunt and a “Shut up!”.

Yes my sister is not the only one who sometimes has difficulty with making a decision.  It’s true, Kyle could care less about wall color, but ask him to pick one Lego off the shelf, forget it!  He will debate back and forth and even plan out the battles in his head, how he wants to play if choosing certain Lego sets.  Unbelievable!  The only reason he’s ever picked out a Lego set with me and fairly quickly might I add, because I have no patience for his deliberation and I force him to make a selection or we leave without a Lego.  That does it every time.

Enough with Kyle’s personality and intellectual DNA, let’s discuss physical traits.  Kyle and Nicole do resemble each other very much.  Again it helps with the blond hair and blue eyes, but they have the same body type, not even close to Ryan’s.  Nicole has never been much of an athlete.  In fact, I believe that was Nicole’s only subject in high school, which she did not excel.  Kyle, completely the same!  They even walk the same and move very slowly. Exactly the same way!

Aunt Nikki hanging with our little man at Chad’s Wedding

Once when Kyle and I were at the playground, mom commented to my dad, “Look Ron, here comes Heather and Nikki.”  referring to Kyle.  Just like my sister he walks a good ten paces behind me, so I have to crane my neck to have a conversation with either of them while on the go.  Let’s discuss when I slow down allowing each individual to catch up, they begin to slow down their pace.  Frustrating! But exactly the same!

Usually when I describe Kyle, I must say the words clunky, clumsy, and stiff roll from my lips.  He is not flexible at all.  At all!  Can you guess who else I might compare him to?  Yes, the one and only Aunt Nikki!  Again, neither are athletes by no means.  Both would be happy just sitting there either playing video games, reading (nothing wrong with that) or watching TV.  However, I will call out, again in recent years, my sister has explored her athletic abilities with hikes and such.  So I guess there is hope for Kyle.

Lastly, let’s discuss attire.  Presently this is not the case, but when Nicole was younger she always dressed sloppy, constantly walking around with stains on her shirt.  It took Nicole years before fashion sense was adopted into her daily life.  Again maybe there is hope for Kyle, because presently his outfits look like something picked as an after thought.  I’m not even talking about formal wear, even if his casual outfits were worn stylish I could certainly  live with that.   Of course, I guess I’m not necessarily talking about the actual clothing but the way it’s worn too.

Sometimes I may pick on Kyle but he is truly loved by all of us.  As I’ve told Kyle time and time again, “If you turn out to be half the person your Aunt Nikki is, your doing alright.”

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Who Does Kyle Favor More, His Dad?

Children need boundaries and ground rules.  When children don’t have structure, they makeup their own rules and negative behavior is what they use to get your attention.  ~Jo Frost

Kyle wouldn’t walk around when we first trimmed the fruit trees… he would only help by driving his quad…check out the flames on his quad!

It’s no secret that I like attention, that is only when I want attention.  Actually, I  probably lived for this type of recognition more so when I was younger, and now I could care less.  Sometimes I wish I could blend into the shadows, even though it never works.  Especially if I’m running around in my jp’s (jogging pants) with an old T-shirt and boots.  Now that’s a look!  In general, I must stick out like a sore thumb.  I know I do wearing an outfit like that.  Well maybe not, if I’m in Walmart.  But I’m not here to discuss my attention gaining personality, nor my attire.  I want to discuss my sidekick, Kyle Piper.

Kyle is the same way!  He loves attention!  No matter what kind of attention, positive or negative.  I know he’s just a kid, but he thrives on it something awful.

When Kyle was a little tyke, around a year old, maybe a little younger he would do this thing that absolutely upset everyone.  I’m guessing he felt like he was being ignored.  Now come on!  Seriously?  A cute little baby boy, the only grandchild in our family and the son of my recently deceased brother, ignored?  Now I’m not saying that is or isn’t the case, but certainly not from my family.  In fact, we probably were the opposite and gave Kyle too much attention, if there is such a thing.

What was this horrible act?  If I would set Kyle on the floor or if he was just sitting there playing and he noticed we weren’t paying attention to him, he would drop his head down to the floor, stop it before it hit, and then lightly bang his head.  Then, he would cry and hold his recently bumped noggin.  At first we would immediately respond to the unusual act that unfolded before our eyes.  One of us would run over and pick him up and consul this traumatized child.  That is until this happened too frequently to count.  Eventually, we would make it a point to ignore our center-of-attention-deprived child.  As he would continue playing the same show, we noticed he would look for our reactions, not getting much from us.  I take it that was his cue to maneuver his way over to our always open arms.  Naturally we would pick up the “wounded”, but no one ever dared mention the head banging.  I remember one time, I said to Kyle as he was holding his head and crying crocodile tears, “Then don’t hit your head and it won’t hurt.”  Even though he couldn’t talk, I knew he understood what I was saying.  Smart little kid, the whole thing was a set up.

The first time my sister saw one of Kyle’s performances, she gasp so loud and raised her voice to say, “Ahh O no!  Aunt Heather!”  as she pointed to the self destructive child.  I saw what unfolded and realized Nicole never witnessed this behavior before.  In a very blasé manner, I replied, “Nicole, don’t watch him!  He’s been doing that.  It doesn’t hurt him, he stops himself before he really hits the floor.  Without him knowing, watch next time, his head barely touches the carpet.  Just pay no attention or he’ll keep doing it.”  Nicole, clearly upset did as instructed but was not happy.  To reinforce what we were doing was right I told her, “When Kyle doesn’t get his own way or what he wants, he’ll go straight to the floor and act like he hit his head.  I don’t care, he’s not getting his own way.  He doesn’t dictate orders and he’s not seriously hurt.”

Kyle hanging with his pappy at Jim’s sawmill

On a side note, that’s almost too funny.  I actually remember saying that, and look at us now, Kyle does dictate orders.  We don’t always abide by them, but he does own us.

This act of getting attention has evolved over the years, but the goal remains the same.  Now it’s not always negative attention, even though that does consume the majority of the time.  Sometimes he goes out of his way to really be good.  When he does this, he always points it out.  There is no fear of missing Kyle doing something good because he always states the case.  He likes being praised and recognized for his work and efforts.  Example time!

A few years ago mom and dad were making sauerkraut and Kyle and I were helping.  The entire way through the process Kyle kept saying, “Am I doing good pappy?  How am I doing Aunt Heather?”  This is where Kyle really differs from the family.  We don’t need constant positive reinforcement.  In fact, we really don’t give it very often, only when a job is done and done well.  My theory is, if I’m doing something wrong, I will be told about it.  We are not a shy family about blatantly spitting out the truth or our opinions.  I guess Kyle is different, not about spitting out the honest truth or sharing his opinions.  He does plenty of that, but in regards to needing positive reinforcement.  Even while we were butchering up dad’s deer from this past season, Kyle would say the same thing, “Pappy how am I doing?” and so on and so forth.  Admittingly, I will say I have no patience for that need of constant appraisal.  Now I am not a tyrant, I do respond to Kyle, calling out his good work, but I have limits and I have no issue with saying “Kyle!  Yes buddy you’re doing a great job and we appreciate your help.  I don’t need to tell you that every two minutes.”  Sounds harsh, but I want Kyle to be secure when he’s doing anything and not always needing someones approval.

Sometimes I swear Kyle moves so slow, not really to get on my nerves, but to get my attention.  I know for a fact, that he moves like a snail when getting dressed to take the dogs for a hike, because he doesn’t want to go.  And let’s not forget two weekends ago when Kyle and I were both helping my dad trim back the fruit trees.  It was snowing on us as we worked, only because a cold day is needed so the fruit trees don’t bleed out.  I get it, it’s not the most exciting way to spend a Saturday morning but responsibilities come first.  Once dad cut down the branches, all we had to do was drag the manageable sized trimmings about 50 feet to a burn pile.  Granted we did need to help dad load up the quad with the saw and supplies, but really it wasn’t too taxing.  Completing the job in about three to four hours total, for this long overdue project was not a horrible sacrifice.  Would you believe all Kyle wanted to do was stand by dad and oil his saw when needed, which wasn’t very often, while I dragged the brush?  Are you kidding me?  I even told him if he really worked hard I would omit the hike with the dogs for the day.  Even when making a deal with him, that kid complained the ENTIRE time and walked as slow as he could, trying to do as little as possible.  I swear if he moved any slower he would have been standing still.  Literally, I walked circles around him, going back and forth with the brush.  Boy, his dad would have NEVER tolerated such behavior!  Ryan was an extremely hard working person, and I mean manual labor.  And to have his son, be the complete opposite while the rest of the family picks up for his slack would have never gotten past the first whine.

Mr Stickerhead… Kyle always loved stickers! 11/18/03

As we moved through the day, Dad even tried to lighten the mood by calling him a Sasquatch, and teasing him about the speed in which he moved, like molasses.  He continued on c0urse, except I did catch Kyle snickering, as if he was really enjoying this attention that we were giving him by joking around.  I about lost it and grounded him from cartoons, the computer and his ipod.  If he picked up the pace and stopped moping, I told him he could redeem himself.  Nope!  He continued at a snails pace, with a miserable ‘poor me’ attitude.  Once we got back to the house, Kyle pouted about his punishment, but it was almost as if he wanted to be separated from his electronics.  Whether he enjoyed the sulking or that was his way of showing me he needed attention and restricted from those devices, I have no idea.  There is one thing that I know for sure, even though he was in trouble, he was truly enjoying the attention.  Naturally, everyone was lecturing him on hard work, and pitching in and helping out the family, the standard speech.  He is too much!

A few weekends ago, and come to think of it, this past weekend Kyle was on this kick of making really annoying noises.  The clicking or tapping kind.  He even started doing it in the car, just subtle repetitive knocking, while he would give me a sideways glance.  He didn’t think I saw, but I did.  I let it go, until steam is escaping my ears.  Kyle’s getting good, he knows my limit for patience and tolerance.  He was being annoying the other day and I went to backhanded his shoulder or gut and didn’t realize he was bending over.  I made a direct hit with his forehead.  We both got a chuckle out of that one.  That’s how I know his behavior is more about the attention then the item in question.

You know it’s funny, but I remember doing the same thing as a kid.  Once I had this juice cap top.  The kind that would pop up when the seal was broken.  It might have been from Snapple or some other juice.  Regardless, it had this unique sound that I loved.  I would walk around clicking it and clicking it.  Sometimes, if I didn’t want to listen to Nicole while she barked orders at me, I would just click the bottle cap at her and walk away.  Clicking it in Ryan’s face was just fun to get a rise out of him.  He was like Nicole pretty laid back, until seriously pushed.  Although, even though I really enjoyed clicking it to be irritating, sometimes my intent wasn’t to get on everyone’s nerves but to enjoy this unique sound it made.  That is until one day it went missing.  I know Ryan or Nicole had something to do with its disappearance.  These little moments show me how much Kyle and I are really alike, except he did and still does get ALL of our attention.

Kyle playing with is cousins at Bruce’s picnic.

Surprisingly, or maybe not so, Kyle’s attention grabbing behavior is just a way to show he misses us and wants to spend time with the family.  This past weekend, my sister was home.  Kyle was up her butt and needed her to do everything with him all weekend.  She couldn’t just sit and relax because he was like a leach, a whining one.  Other times, I think Kyle is just board and wants some activity, even though I do keep him pretty busy.  He gets on these kicks of playing chess, which I encourage.  No one else will really play with him except me, only because my parents don’t know how to play and my sister really doesn’t like playing.  Yet he will walk around nagging everyone, because that’s what he wants to do, and he wants the interaction of the family.  Usually if we’re talking about chess, I’ll bite.  Kyle knows I enjoy a good game.  Again, I get it, he’s just showing us how much he loves us.  We truly love having Kyle around and spending time with him, even on the irritating days.

Even when Kyle is not seeking attention, he gets it.  Like anyone needs to fuel this already blazing fire.  I will admit, it’s almost always due to a good dead or a thoughtful action.  Others notice his behavior and want to praise him.  I guess I should be proud of that attention, which I always am.  I just don’t want Kyle’s already large round head to grow anymore.  My fear of Kyle failing in life because of his own ego or attitude is very real.  That’s why I try to knock him down a peg or two, just to keep him in check with reality.  No matter what, I love him very much and I’m so proud of the little man he’s become.  Maybe he’ll grow out of this need for attention.  It took me a while but I did, well kinda.

Music is a moral law.  It gives soul t the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything.  ~Plato

Kyle hanging out on the Big Piano FAO Schwarz. ‘Aunt Nikki & Kyle’s week of Fun’ in New York City, NY 2011

Yesterday was Kyle’s sixth grade music recital.  Yes, it was his last music assembly of elementary school.  He sang and played the trumpet along with the rest of the sixth grade class.  He’s grown up so much in many ways, and yet he is still truly just a kid.

Mom and I were in the second row enjoying the musical theme, From the Inside Out.  Dad and Nicole were both working, so I did my best to video tape some of the assembly, giving them a glimpse of what was presented.

As Kyle mounted the stage, I caught his eye.  He gave me one of his trying-not-to-smile smiles.  Naturally, I had to give him a wave to confirm my presence, and to instigate a bit.  I was sincerely excited to see him sing and play!

Kyle with his friends at his 6th Grade Music Recital 2/21/13

As he was clapping and singing and stomping and playing his trumpet, all the memories of Kyle’s love of music floated in my head like a painting.  Kandinsky’s theory came to mind.  Wassily Kandinsky (1866-1944) said he could see sound as color and visa verse.  The music I heard came across my mind as images of Kyle over the years, like I was seeing a symphony of pictures tied to their memories.

Always having an adoration for music, even as a tiny five month old baby that could barely hold himself up, Kyle would keep the beat and sway to music, or at least try.  Either for Kyle’s first or second Christmas, my grandma got him this stuffed musical penguin that played Jingle Bells.  On a side note, maybe that’s why Kyle has such a bond with that song.  When we played the penguin, Kyle’s eyes would light up, he would smile and his body would go into motion.  The best part, the penguin moved from side-to-side and Kyle would try and mimic the motion.  It was too funny!  I have no idea what ever happened to that beloved piece of entertainment, but Kyle’s love of music prevails.  I’m not talking about just music on the radio or pumping from my iTunes.  Any music or rhythms coming from anywhere and everywhere picked up by his ears.

Kyle’s 6th Grade Class. “From the Inside Out” 2/21/13

Watching Kyle view a movie is hilarious.  The best part is usually the end while the credits are rolling and the theme song is playing.  Without knowing he’s being watched or without a care, Kyle inadvertently busts a move to the tunes.  Actually, that goes for any show or commercial.  While sitting on the living-room floor either assembling or playing with his Legos, sometimes certain tunes will project from the TV.  Kyle’s body is automatically swaying to the music as if he’s a puppet on strings.  He loves music!

At the very beginning of last semester’s piano lessons, the instructor asked Kyle to bring in his old practice books so he could review and brush up on the basics.  During the lull in time while Kyle didn’t have piano lessons he got rusty, like anyone would.  So to ensure Kyle was learning properly and advancing, David his piano instructor, reinforced his foundation.  Great idea!

Kyle bust’n a move on the dance floor 2003.  Proof I did get him in a shirt & tie!

I remember that first lesson so well.  As we sat in the Seton Hill common room waiting for Kyle’s turn, he started to read through the piano book, a piece he hasn’t looked at for literally years.  Of course what’s old is new again, and Kyle being such an astute student, started looking thr0ugh his music books recapturing knowledge from the first songs that started out his piano training.  Always coming prepared with a book to read, I couldn’t focus on the words on the page for the distraction in front of me.  Kyle was flipping through the pages and humming the songs to reacquired himself with his old friends, the music.  Yes, he was actually humming to himself turning the pages rapidly as if cramming for a test.  His actions were not intended to bring attention to himself, but to prepare for his piano lesson.  He was so engrossed in his own thoughts, he really didn’t notice everyone in the room smiling in his direction.  As I sat there and stared at him, thinking he would notice me, he continued with his train of thought and didn’t break concentration.  I was ready to bust a gut and laugh out loud, that is until he was saved by his piano teacher.  David’s appearance interrupted Kyle’s focus and brought him back to reality.

We used to laugh and say music would sooth the savage beast, referring to Kyle.  It did!

I love seeing the joy and inspiration that music brings to Kyle.  For the sixth grade field trip this year, the students went to Heinz Hall and listened to the symphony.  He came home and told us all about it with sheer excitement.  In fact, while we were driving, Kyle remembered his trip to Pittsburgh because he started searching the radio for a specific channel.  He was trying to find the classical music station on the radio.  He said, “Aunt Heather, they told us we could listen to the music on the radio.”  Once he found it, he beamed with delight!  Since then, Kyle has been listening to the classical music station when we are on the move.  Nice change of pace!  Good thinking Kyle!